fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2420 ]

[ SECRET POST #2420 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2420 ⌋

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Notes:

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Well, most of my extended family up North are criminals. So...I just try and avoid them.

When I went on my trip back home to SC, one of my cousins (who was just released from prison) was there. My sister ran to her boyfriend and was like, "That is my cousin _______, try not to be alone with him. And be nice. He will kill you." And the BF was like (thinking it was the usual shovel talk), "Yeah, okay. lol." And my sister goes, "No. He will kill you and go to prison. He doesn't care. If I were to go out there right now and say you hurt me, he would hurt you. And. Go. To. Prison." Fortunately, Cousin ______ was well behaved and no blood was shed.

Some of the stories I could tell you about my family up North...they are nuts.

Edited 2013-08-18 19:49 (UTC)

Holy shit! At least the guy sounds uh... protective? Nah I got nothing.

Yup. Very protective. Like, he is friendly towards family and women. But god help someone who decides to show disrespect towards family.

He once through a guy out of our backdoor (we don't have a porch on the back) into some bramble bushes three times for interrupting my dad when he was talking. Though, you would figure after the first time, the guy would get the picture and stop interrupting.

I keep forgetting that you also have a fucked up family!

Have I ever told the story about how my aunt escaped from prison?

Most of the GIFs for tell me more are sarcastic :C

I don't -think- we have ever had a member escape from jail. They usually get released on their own.

I also have an uncle whom can escape if he wants to (he tends to be in a really low security prison, and they don't especially lock the doors or are that strict, and there is this gap under one of the gates), but as the sentence for escaping is worse than just staying out the time, they don't.

This might not be a daring escape story, but in my defence it is true:

Anyway, my aunt was sentenced to like a month in prison when she was 19, because of an unpaid fine (pot was found in her flat, but it wasn't hers, so she refused to pay). Anyway at that time the prison she was sentenced to stay at, was undergoing construction so the females were placed in temporary housing (again low security prison so no dangerous people) in an old building at the prison.

At this time it is worth to mention that my aunt read an news article right before getting her sentence about the fact that the prison she ended up in was "escape proof".

Anyway, my aunt being 19 and already pretty adept at not too legal stuff (though the female members of my family don't really break the law, it is the men) and well she was one of 7 siblings, so she had snuck out of her house before without raising alarms also different Children's Homes.

Sitting in the temporary jail cell one of the first nights she where there (low security prison, you walk around inside the prison grounds until bedtime, then they lock you in) and she noticed that she could easily get out the window and climb one of the walls. So she put her pillow and some stuff under her blanket and made it look like someone was sleeping in her bed (just like she did when she still lived at home) and jumped the fence.

It is here her problems started (though not where you would assume), she went to her and her then boyfriend's house and moments after getting there she had to run as her then BF owed some people money and they came to collect it (and as you might know, GF are the ones that get beat up).

As she had no money/ID/Stuff and it was the middle of winter up North she was cold, tired and hungry so she figured out the best course of action was to go to the police station reporting herself missing from the prison. She met a policeman (who probably also had read the same escape proof article as my aunt), he called up to the prison asking them if they were missing a imate, the prison guard said no (remember the fake person in her bed). So my aunt was sent away.

So my aunt was just walking around for a couple of hours having nowhere to go, before she decided to go back to the police station and tell him to call the prison again, now telling that he had to actually look in her bed, not just see in the door.

So 12 hours after escaping they finally figured out she was gone, so back to prison she went. She was sent directly to the head of the prison, he asked her if she would run away again, and as my aunt was 19 and just as hard headed and stubborn as the rest of my family she answered "of course I will, it is your job to make sure I am unable to do so". She ended up in the unfinished female ward of the prison where she hung out with the builders and getting sent love letters in comic books from the make inmates.

She didn't even get a longer sentence, because she was so difficult to keep in the prison (and as she didn't really do anything that wrong), then let her go after a month and after that my aunt have never been back to jail and my family got another story to tell around the dinner table.

~~I could of course tell more of them, but as I don't want my family to be recognized or anyone to go to jail again, this is the only story that is okay to tell in a public space~~

That's one awesome story.

You should her my aunt telling it, with sound effects and everything. She is an awesome storyteller, and if I ever do the practical video production course, I will film her telling something (legal) about my family!

They probably didn't give her a longer sentence because they were embarrassed! They would have had to write that up in a report, "Inmate escaped, tried to turn self in, was denied, had to turn self in again."

Yeah not to mention, the prison was supposed to be escape proof...

Ah, all prisons say that! And even Alcatraz had some maybe escapes.

I always think that if I ever want to turn to a life of crime, I'm going to move to Norway. You have the best (or worst?) prisons.

I suspect this will turn into an essay, sorry about that Anon, but I tend to drift a bit...

High quality prison, less people end up back in prison after going once, mostly because we treat prisoners like human beings in need of help, which in turns means that you can get a high school or university degree while in prison, also work experience and counseling.

Prison guards also go under the same work group as nurses and teachers in Norway so that might also be something.

Oh and when you have served your sentence you are forgiven for the crime which means you can get a job (with obvious exceptions, child predators don't work with children, and so on). We also offer help to inmates after the sentence so they can find a place to live, psychological help and so on.
~~and we have life sentences we just go about it in a roundabout way~~

Not Norwegian, but god I just don't understand why people find this such a difficult concept! Prison should be about rehabilitation, not punishment. Considering, one way or the other, society will be paying for it, why not make it so that these people can re-enter society in a useful way?

I honestly think most people just love to know that people are suffering in prison.

they don't especially lock the doors

Holy crap I almost died laughing at that part.

Well it isn't far of, the lock the doors to the outside world (and the gates), but not the cell doors.

It is a prison mainly for drunk drivers, people whom haven't paid fines and petty crimes, no violent offenders and none with sentences longer than like 2 years (or so), it is one of the lowest security prisons in Norways, mainly because some people have sentences as short as 14 days (driving too fast) and they would never try to escape, because that sentence is a lot more than 2 years long.

I kind of assumed that's what you meant but couldn't stop laughing at the thought of low security = "Well we lock the doors. Sometimes. When it feels right".

That is an awesome story!

Ah the relatives in jail. My mom used to tell me she would find out where her niece and nephews were by reading the local paper for the police blotter.

The dumbest part? They're in jail for not showing up for court dates.

God. I know some people that end up in jail because of a warrant they have for like...a $100 offense. -__-

That's my cousins! It happens all the time, it's ridiculous.

...At least he's protective? Okay, I got nothing.

You and Making-Excuses win this whole thread.

Edited 2013-08-19 00:52 (UTC)

Worst thread to win. :P

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[ SECRET POST #2420 ]

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