[ SECRET POST #2446 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2446 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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03.


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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]




















04. [WARNING for gore, blood, etc]

[How To Train Your Dragon]


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05. [WARNING for child abuse]



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06. [WARNING for rape]



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07. [WARNING for rape]



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08. [WARNING for torture]

[Fall Out Boy's "The Phoenix"]


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09. [WARNING for underage]

[pokemon conquest]


















Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #349.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[rocketgirl]

Not disagreeing that it's good to have a thick skin and learn to deal with all the shit people have to put up with, but it is nice to have places where you don't have to worry about that kind of thing.

[(Anonymous)]

Nice != Good.

[(Anonymous)]

Yes, but nice != Bad also.

It's not fandom's job to figure out if safe spaces are good or bad for you. That's your job.

[(Anonymous)]

Sometimes you just want to relax and interact with people in a context where you know you don't have to constantly defend yourself or put up with BS. However, if the trade-off is walking on eggshells around everyone and constantly living in fear you'll make some mistake and offend someone, then it's not worth it. That's why I prefer spending time with friends and family I trust not to be hurtful and to be understanding and forgiving if I misstep, than with strangers in a defined "safe space" where everyone's behavior is heavily restricted and no one knows what might set someone off.

[rocketgirl]

Maybe I'm just not ~tumblr enough for this conversation, but isn't that second one considered a safe space?

[(Anonymous)]

Having to walk on eggshells is not my definition of safe space.

[(Anonymous)]

yeah, for the people that get triggered by everything. for the people that don't know that some triggers even exist and that are not "educated" on the subject, it's hell cause you can't say anything out of fear of triggering someone or being misunderstand and seen as offensive, and if you indeed decide to say something like that anyway people will be at your throat.

[(Anonymous)]

da

yeah I think you're on the ball there, tumblr is meant to be a safe place but it isn't because people are so forceful about it being 'safe' that...no-one can really do or say anything without people getting upset? I guess?


Hell, I mentioned I was cutting back on coffee once and I got fat-wank anons in my inbox and idk why O_O tumblr is fun, but I wouldn't say it's a safe or relaxing place for the more anxious people

[(Anonymous)]

Umm I don't feel like i'm walking on eggshells. I just don't act like a dick, it's not that hard.

[nyxelestia]

For you. Not that hard for you.

If you haven't grown up in this kind of situation, then it can be quite difficult for anyone to realize when something completely innocuous to them will be extremely offensive to someone else - and that's just when dealing with social justice things, where there is at least some semblance of universal standards. When it comes to triggers, it's nearly impossible to know what will or won't set someone else off, which leads to, well, this egg-shell situation.

[thene]

The best safe space I've ever used relied on heavy moderation. Your posts had to be cut and you had to itemise in detail what was under the cut, and if you didn't (or if you missed something), the mods would tell you what warnings you had to add. You then had an hour to do so or the post would be deleted and then reposted by a mod with the correct warnings and tags attacked. This system works very well, and it allows everyone to say whatever they need to while keeping other members safe. But obviously it requires a lot of vigilance and moderator attention - the internet as a whole does not function like this, and doesn't want to.

Which is kinda what it comes down to, for me. We don't WANT everywhere to be a safe space where conversation is that laborious. Doing safe space right, without eggshells, is a massive effort. It is VERY distinct from either normal fandom spaces or real-world spaces, definitely a refuge rather than an alternative to reality. Most places that claim to be safe space aren't, imx.

[nyxelestia]

In all honesty, I have yet to really find this mythical safe space everyone keeps talking about. I am so very fortunate that I have a real life safe space - namely that I can curl up in my bed and expect my privacy to be respected about 90% of the time. I feel so, so sorry for anyone who doesn't have a real life safe space and is stuck looking to fandom for an online substitute.

[thene]

'Safe space' was originally a therapeutic concept. You can't be in therapy forever, and most people do not need to be in therapy most of the time. I wish we had a different term for what fandom wants safe space to be - 'comfortable space', maybe?

[(Anonymous)]

One of these things is a safe space, the other is people being dicks.