fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2467 ]

[ SECRET POST #2467 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2467 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Attack on Titan]

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[Harry Potter]

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[Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D./Phil Coulson]

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[Breaking Bad / Back to the Future]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #352.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Uhhh. Have you been to the doctor? I think your first step should be going to the doctor.

Yeah, I agree. OP, you should see a doctor about it.

This. Go see a damned doctor.

ayrt

After the seizure? No, not yet. Unless something shitastic happens, I'm leaning toward just leaving this whole thing behind me. I really don't want something on my medical record that could fuck up the rest of my life, especially when it may never happen again.

The problem is that it's not impossible to run across things that could set off. Strobe lights, for example, can do it and it's better to have it on there. [Also, the only things it would really bar you from are things that could set it off - so you shouldn't be doing them anyways.]

Not to mention bulbs that take on strobe-like quality before finally burning out. This happened at work and at points I was very glad it wasn't a trigger for anyone in the office.

ayrt

Oh fuck me, that's true. But man, I wanna get a job and shit. I have a cousin (not related by blood) who was diagnosed with (a much stronger version) of photosensitive epilepsy. That cousin cannot drive by law, and still lives with his parents, with no job. I do not want to end up like that.

I'm at such a critical point in my life, that if I get it checked out now, it will fuck my chances over for the rest of my life. And I mean, most places by law can't include the kinds of stimuli that would potentially trip seizures.

I'm really not trying to justify being potentially irresponsible, I'm just terrified that I've figured out how to really and truly fuck myself over.

But as you said, it's a much stronger version, and there may be other reasons this cousin can't get a job or drive. I can't think of many jobs you couldn't hold specifically because you occasionally have seizures.

AYRT

I know how that feels. I actually was completely disqualified for the career I was planning on going into when it was found that I had a mental illness - but at the same time? It's better to be safe than sorry, you know?

Okay look.

Having it on your record - could fuck up your life

Not having it on your record and landing a job where it might matter - could fuck up a whole lot of other people's lives, REALLY. Suppose you're operating sensitive equipment, in a situation where people need to rely on you to have full control at all times, and you have a seizure? I mean how many people are you willing to risk fucking over/killing so you can have a certain specific career? Or say you have a seizure on the job because your employer was not doing anything to prevent exposure to seizure triggers - how are they going to feel about causing that, and how is their insurer going to feel about anything that got fucked up due to your seizure?

Not getting this checked out is pretty selfish imo. You're saying it's all about how YOU want your life to be, fuck safety, fuck other people, fuck any future employers, fuck your friends and your family and how they'd feel if anything went wrong.

OP

Not sure you read through the rest of the posts, but I pretty much acknowledged all this in a few of my replies to other people. That it would be irresponsible and pretty much goddamn awful of me to pursue a job that would endanger other people's lives to protect myself.

This is absolutely the last thing I want to do. It's kind of pretty much the moral antithesis to all of the kind of jobs that I am interested in and devoted to.

I am, however, human. And I am allowed to have a freak out moment at the idea that having a serious disease might prohibit me from engaging in a career field that I had been devoted to for a long time now. I am allowed to acknowledge that loss-- of both health and identity. I am allowed to be scared.

But you are right. I'm not allowed to endanger other people with my own problems. And I don't plan to.

"I'm allowed to acknowledge and freak the fuck out over this enormous loss that I'm currently only suffering in my imagination."

Fixed that for you.

AYRT (above anon is not me)

That's fair, but, it's not like you were certain of getting the job you wanted anyway. Most people don't end up where they expected to. If you were basing your identity on a job you didn't yet have, that's put you in an unfortunate bind, but you'll find something else out there.

You don't want to wait until something shitastic happens. Really. Seizures can have serious consequences.

Uh, a seizure IS shitastic. And where do you live, and what work do you do that it is contingent on approving your medical record? AND if you DO have a condition that would preclude you from a certain job...there's probably a reason you should not be doing that job. By not disclosing a condition, you're not only fucking yourself over, but your (potential?) employer, too, And if this job you want/have makes you responsible for other people, you're fucking them all over as well.

Basically, if there's nothing wrong with you, there will be nothing in your medical report that would give somebody pause. If there IS something wrong with you, then you're dead-on with this thread title, because you're being a fucking irresponsible moron.

OP

I know it's kind of shitastic already, but I meant more like long term effects or a lowered threshold for light sensitivity.

And it's not that it precludes me from a certain job-- it's that it may preclude me from a huge range of jobs that are in my main area of interest.

But you are absolutely right. If I have a condition that would endanger myself or others, I need to get it checked out.

I'm sorry I'm just... really really freaked out about the possibility that I've effectively opened the goddamn biological Pandora's box and fucked myself over for the rest of my life.

This is real life, not Greek mythology. Whatever issue you have existed before you watched some "test video" on the internet. But fact is, you don't know what's wrong, how severe it is, what the implications are, what treatments exist or if said treatments (if you even need them) would make you fit for whatever you want to do.

And you won't know those things until you see a doctor. I know that you're nervous and scared, but the key is not to waste so much energy on being nervous and scared that you get blinded to the right thing to do -- which also happens to be the thing that can alleviate your nervous fear.

You know what's shitastic? SEIZURES.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2467 ]

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