case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2013-12-31 06:36 pm

[ SECRET POST #2555 ]


⌈ Secret Post #2555 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.
[Attack on Titan/Shingeki No Kyojin]


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03.
[The Muppet Movie]


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04.
[Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen]


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05.
[Frozen]


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06.
[Once Upon a Time]


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07.
[Dissonance]


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08.
[Zooey Deschanel]


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09.
[My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic]


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10.
[Eona: The Last Dragoneye]














Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 038 secrets from Secret Submission Post #364.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 2 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Re: I did something horrible and I can't ever atone.

(Anonymous) 2014-01-01 01:36 am (UTC)(link)
I had an abortion. Nobody knew I was pregnant. I'm 16. I got drunk and had sex. I swore to save myself for marriage and threw it all away by drinking and acting like a whore.

I feel so dirty. I feel like I let everyone down. I broke the promise I made to myself. I can't have my virginity back. I can't have that baby back. The life I knew is over. There is a new me living my life and nobody else knows this except me.

Re: I did something horrible and I can't ever atone.

(Anonymous) 2014-01-01 01:45 am (UTC)(link)
Wow. First of all, thanks for telling us, that took bravery. Secondly, I echo what one of the other anons said, all you have to do to atone is say you're sorry, and (try to) not do that thing again...which it sounds like you're not going to, anyway. Did the clinic not offer you counseling or advice for what to do/where to go after, if you have problems? Can you contact the clinic where you went, and ask them to give you a referral?

I would not say your life is over. You are still you, even though it may not feel like it right now (being a teenager on top of all of this is not easy, either.) I would say your life has taken a direction that you didn't foresee, but it's not a road you have to stay on. (Especially the drinking part.)

Give it time. A lot of time. I promise you things will look vastly different than they do now, ten or twenty years out from adolescence. That's a part of growing up.

Re: I did something horrible and I can't ever atone.

(Anonymous) 2014-01-01 01:56 am (UTC)(link)
Having sex doesn't make you a 'whore'. Being a woman and having sex does not make you dirty. Virginity is not a badge that women must keep to be worth something-You didn't lose anything, and you aren't any lesser for it.

You did what you had to do, for your life, your choices. You're only sixteen, anyone who faults you for having an abortion can go take a long walk off of a short pier. I know this must have been extremely hard for you, but don't hate yourself for it. Don't. People make mistakes sometimes, and it doesn't have to mean the end of your life. Is there anyone you could talk to? If only for moral support?

Re: I did something horrible and I can't ever atone.

(Anonymous) 2014-01-01 01:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Having sex doesn't make you a 'whore'. Being a woman and having sex does not make you dirty. Virginity is not a badge that women must keep to be worth something-You didn't lose anything, and you aren't any lesser for it.

This. Your life is worth far, far more than your virginity.

My only opinions on abortion are that it's a personal choice and it isn't for anyone to judge. OP, you recognize you aren't ready for a child, so you had the pregnancy terminated. There are far worse outcomes to this situation. Trust me. Far worse. I understand feeling bad or guilty about it, but like anon before me says, is there someone you can talk to? Someone who will listen and sympathize, someone who won't betray your trust?
lunabee34: (Default)

Re: I did something horrible and I can't ever atone.

[personal profile] lunabee34 2014-01-01 02:24 am (UTC)(link)
If you would like to PM me to talk about this Anon, please do. *hugs*
caerbannog: (Default)

Re: I did something horrible and I can't ever atone.

[personal profile] caerbannog 2014-01-01 03:13 am (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry you feel so bad anon, but you're not a horrible person. You're young and make mistakes, but you're not dirty or horrible. :( *hugs hugs* Grow and learn from it as much as you can.

Re: I did something horrible and I can't ever atone.

(Anonymous) 2014-01-01 01:51 pm (UTC)(link)
The best thing you can do in this situation? Learn from it. Which it truly sounds like you have. Alcohol lowers your inhibitions, and things that you would never even consider sober can start sounding downright reasonable when you're not in your right mind.

No, you can't have your virginity back. But someday you will find someone who loves you. No, you can't have that baby back, but maybe someday you'll have other children. Yes, you'll always remember the one you didn't have, but the pain will lessen with time. I don't know you or your life situation, but if you honestly felt that abortion rather than adoption or raising the child was the best option for you and your situation.. then you did the best you could, and that's all you can really do.

If you're religious, and your crisis is rooted in that, remember: God loves you. He knows we're human, and thus we make mistakes. We mess up all the time. Yet he constantly forgives. He forgives you, and hopefully in time you'll be able to forgive yourself.

Of course, this comes from someone who staunchly believed in saving herself for marriage.. then when I hit my late twenties with no prospects, I simply got tired of being virgo intacta, so I took my own physical virginity. So take that as you will. :)