fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2609 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2609 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 076 secrets from Secret Submission Post #372.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

My favorite part of this is his "warning"

Warning: generalizations are used liberally below. Mentally preface all statements with "in general" and don't yell at me.

Then he goes on to immediately make sweeping statements like

Gay sex in fanfic is all wrong.

But wait! You can't yell at him about any of his statements because he put a warning up! Not even going into all the other irritating stuff about this 'essay', I hate shit like this. If you want people to think you're making generalizations and that you in fact realize not everyone does this then write it that way. He's trying to get people upset while simultaneously negating and brushing off that upset. It's fucking annoying and makes me not take anything he has to say seriously or for that matter not even want to read the rest of his shit.

I lied. I went back and read some of it and the entire thing annoys me. Because yeah, we're not writing this for his particular enjoyment. He seems amazingly oblivious as to why things are catered to him in every sphere - gay sex is being written about so it should automatically be exactly what he prefers and has experienced!

But what annoys me even greater is the people in the comments thanking him because women have so few real life accurate resources for their porn! And few, they were really afraid they had gotten stuff wrong but it turns out they can breath easy because one gay dude thinks the way they wrote their sex is okay. Crisis averted!

I've seen stuff like this before. A gay dude walks into fandom out and proud and the fangirls flock to him as some sort of can do no wrong guru. There's one in every fandom, it seems.

AYRT
Exactly! That is my problem. This stuff isn't written to be catered to him, fandom is pretty much the one place where we can write whatever the hell we want.
Not to mention that his experiences=/= everyone elses experiences. Just because he doesn't like teeth doesn't mean other has.

SIGHS.

At what point after dozens, hundred, or thousands of people have read your inaccurate, skeevy, and stereotype-loaded porn do the members of the oppressed (in some cases violently so) groups you're writing about get an opportunity to comment?

And, "walks into fandom?" We're already here, have been from the start.

I don't think you've encountered the type of fandom creature that I'm talking about. Of course there are fandom people from all demographics in fandom.

And you want to complain about inaccurate, skeevy, and stereotype-loaded porn and comment on it? Go for it! But don't make general sweeping statements that "all fic is wrong" and that women are inexperienced with male anatomy and then go on to say that your experience alone is Doing It Right.

Curious, did you read the link or just react to my, admittedly over the top emotional, response?

Yes, I did read the link in question. I found his claims mostly accurate to my experiences, your response not fair to the author in question, and deeply anti-gay in saying that gay men shouldn't talk about how people write gay sex.

I didn't say gay men shouldn't talk about how people write gay sex, and that's not what I mean. I'm sorry you read it that way. What I think is no individual has the right to come into a fandom space and tell the entirety of it that they are doing it wrong because of their own experience. He had a few valid points, but his overall approach and attitude ruined any credit he may have had.

But if you agreed with the author and found no problems with his piece then obviously we are just two individuals who will not agree on this point.

Perhaps his comments on fanfic should be read as "admittedly over the top emotional" as well. Sure, I think he's exaggerating a bit, but it's his personal livejournal, so he's allowed some license to rant.

I'm not going to do a content analysis to say how often one-two-three preparation and orgasm in three strokes appears in fanfic.

how often one-two-three preparation and orgasm in three strokes appears in fanfic.

I could do a similar content analysis on how often it appears in het fics, ostensibly written by straight people with direct experience.

Porn is fantasy.

Yes, and we can talk about the ways in which a given pornographic work is flawed or unrealistic.

But he's directly positing that it's women's lack of experience that's causing them to write this brand of "flawed, unrealistic" pornography.

Which is a flawed assertion in the face of the fact that heterosexual pornography - which with they would have experience - is equally flawed and unrealistic.

Well, as the first wave of sex-positive feminists pointed out, that's because few pornographic films for the straight market are directed by women.

But he's not talking about mass produced pornography for men. He's talking about amateur erotica by women for women, as am I. And in both cases, the sex described (by women, about gay men's bodies or their own bodies) is unrealistic and flawed.

Which is often because the women writing it haven't actually had sex, let's be real here.

DA

Or maybe they have and they realize it's an unrealistic fantasy and they prefer the fantasy? Anyone who knows better doesn't go looking for smut expecting realism... but plenty of them go looking for it anyway. It's escapism. It's fantasy.

Everyone knows dragons don't exist. We still love reading about them.

[ SECRET POST #2609 ]

Re: Irritating Attitudes in Fandom

SA

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NAYRT

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