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[ SECRET POST #2686 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2686 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 059 secrets from Secret Submission Post #384.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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So in other words you're a feminist, you just don't want to use the label.

Yo, I generally agree with you, but it's incredibly rude for you to decide what people should label themselves as.

But "I'm not feminist, I'm an egalitarian!" is silly. They're the same damn thing ffs. If it quacks like a duck...

I get the impulse. Conservatives and misogynists have done a very good job of completely destroying, distorting and discrediting the meaning of the word "feminist." Combine that with counter-productive SJWs on the other side and it's easy to see why some people don't want to use the label. But it doesn't change the fact that regardless of what label you use, it's still feminism.

Pretty sure feminists have helped a lot in that regard. Because guess what, radical feminists are still feminists. And I don't want to be associated with those people. And since it looks like sane feminists don't care to distance themselves from their insane brethren, I will NOT be calling myself a feminist.

That's fine. Gold star for bravery.

Dude, if you refuse to associate yourself with anyone because of the loud fringe assholes, you're never going to accomplish a damn thing.

Re: Controversial opinions

dethtoll - 2014-05-12 00:52 (UTC) - Expand

feminists dont want to be associated with radfems either, dipshit.

WOW! Can you also tell me what my sexuality should be? I mean, I am pretty sure I am straight (I have never wanted to have sex with a woman) but occasionally I think, "That actress is attractive." Please, Sir Dethtoll, what should I call myself? I need your wisdom.

Here's what you can call yourself: a goddamn dipshit.

That's the only label you'll ever need.

Thank you for that wisdom. So, now I know that I am a feminist dipshit because you told me so! Thank Dethtoll for your wisdom! PRAISE DETHTOLL!

I said "a goddamn dipshit" -- obviously you don't want to be a feminist so who am I to stop you?

But dipshititude? That's pretty much a given!

(reply from suspended user)

For real.

holy shit, sexuality =/= ideology

apples and oranges, anon

Well, heck. I thought if Deathtoll was just going around telling people what they should label themselves as, he'd give me a bit of advice!

Maybe they think sexuality, like ideology, can be chosen.

Not necessarily. I (nayrt) consider myself egalitarian, not feminist, primarily because I'm pro-life* and this is not permitted if you want to be a feminist. I do not discuss this with people, ever, because virtually every time I have ever stated it anywhere, no matter how I said it or the context, I get personal attacks and harassment for days. I've been internet stalked before by someone who took it extremely personally that I wouldn't change my mind after she told me to kill myself as an enemy of all other women. Stalked for MONTHS, with more of the "you're a horrible person who deserves to die for the hate you're filled with, you should be raped" stuff. I refuse to attach myself to a movement that mandates I should celebrate and promote something I view as murder. I won't go around attacking people for disagreeing with me, but for the 7 years I WAS a feminist, I got so incredibly fed up of every. single. other. feminist. attacking ME for disagreeing with THEM. There are plenty of good things that feminism does, but this is a dealbreaker for me wrt how I identify myself. There are other issues as well that I'm sure others would consider dealbreakers. Feminism doesn't have the market absolutely cornered on thinking gender equality is good, and even when I was a feminist I thought it was kind of weird that so many feminists seemed to be really adamant that it did.

*Because I don't consider it morally permissible to kill anyone at any stage of life unless in self-defense, such as carrying to term would put the mother's life in extreme danger.

This kind of behaviour among self-professed progressives is exactly what conservatives want. Social justice warriors are their own worst enemy because they're too busy running ideological purity tests and not doing anything meaningful.

an enemy of all other women

Not saying you deserve to die or be raped because no one does but you kind of are an "enemy of all other women" if you don't think a woman deserves control over her own body.

By saying you're "pro-life" does that mean you think abortion should be outlawed? Being pro-choice is not "promoting murder", it's promoting a woman's right to make the decisions about her own body and life. Making the decision to have an abortion is one that's incredibly difficult. No one goes around saying "Yeah, abortion!" and pressuring women to get them if they don't want to.

Do you include mental distress as putting a woman's life in danger? You really think a 13 year old girl who's raped by her father should have to spend the next 9 months of her life depressed and borderline suicidal just because you say so?

I'm sorry but if you genuinely think your views should dictate what every other woman is allowed to do with her own body then you are an enemy of women.

See, this is (a mild version of) what I am talking about. Why is okay for YOU to have feelings about something and I am not allowed to? I don't go around pushing my beliefs on people. I don't go around picketing people. I don't go around shaming people. I don't try to make anyone do anything they don't want to. I merely feel that I cannot CONDONE, which is to say, APPROVE OF OR SUPPORT, the idea of killing when it is not in self-defense. And people like you act like it's a crime and I'm a gender traitor and an evil bitch who deserves punishment because I don't wholeheartedly endorse a type of killing I disagree with. And I have, in fact seen people promote abortion over other alternatives. I've seen it plenty, including people saying that it should always be the FIRST choice and that adoption was a BAD. You hear about that woman who taped her abortion so as to show what a positive thing it was? You think that isn't saying "Yeah, abortion!"? Because I saw a lot of people saying that it was great that she did that because now people can see that abortion is fine and good. If you think that no one goes "Abortion is great!" you...probably don't spend a whole lot of time in feminist spaces. And don't you fucking DARE tell me that I'm an enemy of all women because I don't ENDORSE something I consider harmful, that's legal, and that I couldn't do anything about if I tried, which I don't. Great strawman, that is. "Not saying you deserve to die or be raped or anything"? Great, you're in the fucking minority of feminists who have gone after me on this topic.

Whoa whoa whoa WHOA.

I think the anon was fairly polite to you, yet your reaction is to tear their head off like they're the stereotypical dissent-hating baby-murderin' feminazi you claim harass you so much.

Re: Controversial opinions

ibbity - 2014-05-11 23:48 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

(Anonymous) - 2014-05-12 00:01 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

dethtoll - 2014-05-12 00:05 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

(Anonymous) - 2014-05-12 00:19 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

dethtoll - 2014-05-12 00:23 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

(Anonymous) - 2014-05-12 04:42 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

dethtoll - 2014-05-12 04:49 (UTC) - Expand

See, this is (a mild version of) what I am talking about. Why is okay for YOU to have feelings about something and I am not allowed to? I don't go around pushing my beliefs on people. I don't go around picketing people. I don't go around shaming people. I don't try to make anyone do anything they don't want to. I merely feel that I cannot CONDONE, which is to say, APPROVE OF OR SUPPORT, the idea of killing when it is not in self-defense. And people like you act like it's a crime and I'm a gender traitor and an evil bitch who deserves punishment because I don't wholeheartedly endorse a type of killing I disagree with.

I never said you weren't allowed to have feelings about the subject or that you deserved any type of punishment. I said your opinion shouldn't dictate what other women are allowed to do with their lives.

And I have, in fact seen people promote abortion over other alternatives. I've seen it plenty, including people saying that it should always be the FIRST choice and that adoption was a BAD. You hear about that woman who taped her abortion so as to show what a positive thing it was? You think that isn't saying "Yeah, abortion!"? Because I saw a lot of people saying that it was great that she did that because now people can see that abortion is fine and good. If you think that no one goes "Abortion is great!" you...probably don't spend a whole lot of time in feminist spaces.

I should have clarified that I meant no one sane, because you're right on that. There are definitely the fringe people who think abortion should always be the answer 100% of the time, and I disagree completely with them. The whole point is that it should be the woman's choice. Whether that choice is abortion, adoption or carrying the pregnancy to term and then raising that child, it should be up to that woman, period.

As far as that video, we obviously differ in opinion because I DO think it was a good thing. There's a lot of misinformation about abortion out there and the video is a step towards dispelling the myth that abortion is always a horrible, awful, traumatizing thing when in many cases it honestly is the best choice for that individual woman and her individual situation.

And don't you fucking DARE tell me that I'm an enemy of all women because I don't ENDORSE something I consider harmful, that's legal, and that I couldn't do anything about if I tried, which I don't.

I never said you had to endorse it! You are completely entitled to your own opinion and 100% free to make whatever choices are best for you and your own life. All I said was that you don't get to make those choices for other women.

And you ignored my questions so it's really hard to comment any further on this.

Re: Controversial opinions

ibbity - 2014-05-11 23:56 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

dethtoll - 2014-05-11 23:58 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

(Anonymous) - 2014-05-12 00:35 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

ibbity - 2014-05-12 00:44 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

(Anonymous) - 2014-05-12 01:24 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

(Anonymous) - 2014-05-12 22:19 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

diet_poison - 2014-05-13 15:13 (UTC) - Expand

fwiw, I'm "pro-life" in the most basic sense but I don't think it should be illegal. (by "the most basic sense" I basically mean: all people at any stage deserve to live. I DO think it's a nuanced issue. And I don't really want to get into it. Just offering my POV. I'm am not pro-legalizing-abortion, but I don't think abortion is usually the moral choice.)

I'm am not pro-legalizing-abortion

You do realize it's already legal, right?

Re: Controversial opinions

(Anonymous) - 2014-05-12 01:07 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

diet_poison - 2014-05-12 03:27 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Controversial opinions

diet_poison - 2014-05-12 03:27 (UTC) - Expand

Not necessarily. I (nayrt) consider myself egalitarian, not feminist, primarily because I'm pro-life* and this is not permitted if you want to be a feminist.

I hear you, sister! I'm in the same boat. And right now, I don't have the energy for the protracted discussion I see followed your post, so I'll just leave it at that. But I totally get what you're saying, and I feel the same, down to the point of preferring to tell people that I "believe in equality" vs labelling myself as a feminist.

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