[ SECRET POST #2704 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2704 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 022 secrets from Secret Submission Post #386.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

15. http://i.imgur.com/wVdnbmx.png

[(Anonymous)]

Don't be so autistic, it's just a word.

[(Anonymous)]

Try harder next time

[sarillia]

Pedantic=autistic now?

I'm so confused.

(frozen comment)

[comradesmiler]

You're not on 4chan, idiot.

[(Anonymous)]

Don't be such an asshole, it's just an opinion.

[jaybie_jarrett]

Fuck off.

[(Anonymous)]

I really hope you have to dance barefoot on a floor covered in legos for several hours

[(Anonymous)]

Fuck off and die. Whether your trolling or not. Just die.

[(Anonymous)]

If you haven't downloaded a dictionary/thesaurus app to help you find the correct word for your statement, I will be happy to assist.

[kaijinscendre]

If people want a great example of co-dependence in media look no farther than Sam and Dean Winchester.

[(Anonymous)]

Who's the one controlling/manipulating the other one? It seems like they've both taken turns doing that, if anything.

[(Anonymous)]

I DIDN'T KNOW THIS DIFFERENCE, THANK YOU OP!

+1

[(Anonymous)]

This actually makes me happy. I mean, I realize that interdependence isn't super-healthy either, but I'm glad that this (platonic) RP pair I'm half of isn't quite as terrible as I thought it was.

[diet_poison]

Me neither. It is good to know these details in a place like fandom.

ETA: (even if the secret wasn't entirely correct - you learn a lot by reading threads too)

[feotakahari]

What fandoms is this used in? I've only seen it in Ace Attorney, which had a canon character who was described with the term.

[(Anonymous)]

Pretty much every fandom where two characters (or more) are very attached to each other and would do close to anything to keep the other one safe and/or happy. (Supernatural being the biggest one I know of.)

This especially pisses me off because I'm a diagnosed Codependent, and yeah, it's not sweet or romantic. I WISH I could have a relationship like the one above, where at least you have some equal give and take. But the term "Codependent" usually applies to ONE person in a relationship, the other person being the DEPENDENT that (knowingly or unknowingly) takes advantage of the Codependent's need to be needed. (Not saying the Codependent is a victim or a saint. We tend to think we know what's best for EVERYONE, and manage to alienate a lot of people that way. (The Dependents usually being an exception to that, because they WANT to be taken care of.) And we're enablers, so if we help out an alcoholic or a drug addict, we aren't helping them, even if we think we are.) A quick Google search will tell you what Codependent actually means, which I guess most fans (and writers) don't bother with.

[a_potato]

I keep trying to respond to this secret, but I'm having so much difficulty organizing my thoughts. Eh, I guess I'll just give it by best shot.

I agree with you that the term "codependent" is misused. However, I don't quite like the way you're defining "interdependent." An interdependent relationship isn't necessarily one in which two people cannot function without one another, as that is unhealthy. Interdependence is the "sweet spot" between complete independence and complete dependency.

[(Anonymous)]

The term itself is the problem. If it's only one person who is dependent, there is no "co" involved. Co-workers are people who work together. Co-parents are people who parent together. But there's no togetherness in codependency. So really what people mean is that both people in the relationship have dependent personality disorder. But codependent makes perfect semantic sense and is shorter than dependent personality disorder.

[(Anonymous)]

Either way, whatever word you're using, it's a really unhealthy way to function in a relationship.

[littlestbirds]

IAWTC. Outside fandom as well. My room-mate used it to describe her relationship with her thesis supervisor, and I was like "pretty sure you don't know what that means!!"

[intrigueing]

Yeah, that's um. A preeeeetttttty damn relevant difference. :) Although like some of the commenters have said upthread, interdependence is not that extreme either. Although your examples for interdependence aren't dangerously extreme either so I guess you didn't mean to imply interdependence was extremely unhealthy?

I think you mean (inter)overdependence for people who can't function without each other.

[(Anonymous)]

And that 'co' is probably confusing to many people as mentioned above.

[seventh_seal]

thanks for educating me, I have been using that word wrong!

[(Anonymous)]

Is anyone else now trying to work out where all of their favourite pairings fall?

Jack/Ianto, codependent in the canon, leaning more towards interdependent in fanon.

Doctor/Rose, codependent. Doctor/anyone codependent, really.