fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2776 ]

[ SECRET POST #2776 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2776 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 085 secrets from Secret Submission Post #397.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Says the one that's been dodging with evasive questions all thread.

You're just as guilty though. Why you keep replying, nonny? :T

Why do you?
You're the one that started it and can't seem to let go.

Because I'm interested to know why you're so invested in my feelings and protecting OP.

I am a feminist and I believe women should be able to freely express their desires when they concern themselves, as OP's secret does. I do not take kindly to people telling women to repress themselves.

Her saying the man she's with is "not a real man" is awful though, why would you defend a person who thinks this way?

Because he obviously doesn't meet her needs and she has every right to complain about that. Even more so within the context of an anonymous confession where no names are given.
Why are you so invested in this? You're taking it quite personally, did your girlfriend dump you because you did not meet her needs too?

I'm female and I've already explained in my original comment why OP ticks me off. Someone being with someone whose worst fault is that they're "not a real man" (whatever that means) and then complaining/insulting them behind their backs instead of just breaking up with them is just a douchey thing to do. Not to mention, as a woman, I'm fed up with the notion that "hurr durr women all wanna be with abusive alpha jerks, they don't like betas" and then having someone like OP reinforce that. It's a hot button issue for me and I hate that I'm constantly lumped in with people like OP.

Other people assuming women are all the same doesn't rob OP of her right to complain, even more so when she only spoke of herself and for herself.

Still, I don't see how you can condone her behavior. She knows he's not right for her, yet she's still with him and insults him behind his back because ??? And I have a right to be annoyed by OP, her stance is far more prevalent in the mainstream and is more damaging than my stupid little comment. I know women should be allowed to be attracted to or like whatever they want with impunity, but that's unfortunately not the world we live in and this "all women want abusive alphas" mindset bothers me terribly. Surely you can understand that, right?

Complaining is a good way to vent frustration. You're doing it yourself.

If her stance is far more prevalent in the mainstream, all I can infer is that it's because that's what a huge number of women are attracted to. It is not "more damaging" then because it is actually what a lot of women desire, and please note that I am inferring this from your own comment. What's damaging is not those women, but people who jump from "a lot" to "all" and you giving them credit.

But I don't desire that at all. I know a lot of women don't. It's tiring to be presumed submissive or wanting to be with an aggressive man just because I'm female, yet that is always the case. What's damaging is women like OP, hating a man for not being 'a real man' (which is not a cool thing to say), and then others (mostly neckbeards) seeing things like this and using it as confirmation.

OP is still not a good person judging from her secret alone. She insults her boyfriend for the heinous crime of being a wimp and wants a man to abuse her. Judging by the replies, I'm not alone on having a low opinion of her. I don't know why you're singling me out though.

You don't. OP does. A lot of other women do, you yourself complained that that's the "mainstream attitude". And they have as much as a right to express and have their desires be respected as you want yours to be. OP is not damaging in the least and you telling her to shut up are only causing more and more frustration. If there's anyone you should be angry with, it's neckbeards.

The replies here are not many, most are sympathizing with OP and just telling her to dump her SO and find someone better matched to her. You're the only one who went as far as saying she has no right to complain about matters that concern her.

I didn't mean she should literally shut up though, that was me saying "fuck you" in a roundabout way. I'm mad at neckbeards and I'm frustrated by women who perpetuate that belief. It's a "mainstream attitude" for a myriad of reasons, but mainstream things can also be misconceptions. Like the misconception that women having rape fantasies = most women want to secretly be raped in real life.

And most of the comments seem rather flippant and passive aggressive if you ask me. "Grow a spine", "enlighten us, princess", "you're the spineless one in this situation", etc. are not sympathetic. The ones that are sympathetic are to her boyfriend, not her.

OP wrote "sweetly abuse" so I think the misconception here is yours. Much like the idea a jealous, possessive lover to whatever extent they're comfortable with is abusive to you but extremely flattering to many other women. And they still have a right to want a SO fitted to their tastes and complain when they can't get one.

It wouldn't surprise me if those comments were from the same few persons. Regardless, I think now that she's vented OP should definitely dump him and find herself someone better, but I for one am still sympathetic, and I'm not the only one in the thread.

The word "abuse" still gets misconstrued by men and the general public though. Women shouldn't have to censor their desires, but assholes still exist and conflate everything and mercilessly generalize all women. OP has a right to vent, just like I have a right to tell her to fuck off. Perhaps I should've just said that in the first place, because your main issue with me seems to stem from telling her to shut up. Could have saved the both of us a lot of time.

Eh, if you're familiar with FS then these comments are par for the course here. I doubt they're from the same few persons. Still, seems like a majority have more sympathy for her boyfriend's plight than hers.

Of course betas would sympathize with betas.

Snarky comments aside, the word "abuse" still gets misconstrued by men and the general public though because sjws and radfems call "abuse" what goes on in 50 shades of Grey and other such women-oriented romance, even though it's the fantasy of an adult woman who never puts her heroine through ****actual**** suffering or danger.

I was under the impression this place was populated mostly by women. I was surprised you thought I was a dude at first but judging by my behavior earlier, I understand why you did. I'm sorry for acting like a tool and making this into a bigger thing than it is. But it's hard being a not-submissive female in a world that just automatically shoves women into the submissive category.

I haven't read 50 Shades, but it seems pretty abusive from what I can tell. It romanticizes a relationship in which the main character constantly tells her lover to stop while he goes ahead and does it anyway. That's not a proper BDSM relationship, yet the general public thinks otherwise due to the popularity of the series.

There's been many a comment saying not every commenter here is female.

5SOG doesn't present itself as a manual to BDSM and the general public is wrong to take it that way.

Weren't you the one who spoke earlier about rape fantasies? Women's rape fantasies center around the idea of a man they want not stopping when they say "no" because thy don't really want him to stop anyway. There's been many an article on this and calling them "rape" fantasies is entirely misleading. 5SOG is a book about that, and women have a right to those desires especially since quite often it's what best gets them off.

...oh. So you're not a feminist. You're an MRA.

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2014-08-10 19:59 (UTC) - Expand

Look, I hate to tell you this but neckbeards will use anything as justification for hating women because they want to hate women. They don't actually want to be convinced that women are human beings. Be mad at the OP for being a douchebag, but don't get suckered into the meritless idea that when someone ignores three billion humans' worth of evidence against misogyny because they want to be misoogynist, it's somehow the fault of the women who weren't nice enough. It is not.

"Not all women"

What about "not all women"?

lol

NO U

NO U

NO U

NO U

OP and Sarah the boring, is that you? Keep wanking. I've not seen a thread get this physically bent in forever.

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