fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3027 ]

[ SECRET POST #3027 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3027 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Any advice.

Always wear clean socks.

Damn good advice.

Also underwear

If you're going to quit, don't quit cold turkey. Check yourself into a hospital and have medical supervision. Alcohol withdrawal symptoms can be extremely dangerous.

This.

Also, get yourself professional help in general. Not just for your mental health, but therapy usually also involves informing about how alcoholism works and the like, which could help you understand yourself better.

Don't make a secret out of it. It is an illness, you don't have to be ashamed of it. It will suck big time and people will be idiots about it, but hiding it is a relapse waiting to happen.

Don't treat yourself worse than you would treat other people yourself.

+3 Try and slowly dial yourself back.

Have less and less alcohol in the house until it's a dry house. Don't beat ourself up if you have setbacks. Maybe let friends or coworkers you go out for drinks with know what you're doing and ask for their support by not offering you drinks.

If you're trying to quit and you slip up, it's not the end of the world. Obviously it's not ideal, but it doesn't make you a failure. It just means you have to keep trying. Never think that a slip-up means you won't ever be able to get the problem under control! It just takes time and patience. If addictions were easy to overcome, they wouldn't be addictions.

It's such a cliche, but you really do just have to take things one day at a time.

Stop drinking.

You're a dick.

I'm also not wrong.

Or are you suggesting "Keep drinking" is the correct course of action?

Re: Who has advice for an alcoholic?

(Anonymous) - 2015-04-18 21:01 (UTC) - Expand

If someone's an alcoholic, think we can assume they've already tried that and failed at it.

Get professional help. And I don't say this often, but addiction is one of those things that you can rarely beat yourself.

Make sure you have a water jug to rehydrate in the morning, and use uber instead of driving. Also avoid gin, it will give you such a horrible mouth residue. Genuine Scotch from Scotland is what you want to be drinking.

...I was going to say that this thread isn't the place for that advice, but I realized that OP didn't actually request "advice on stopping being an alcoholic". If in fact they meant "advice on maintaining alcoholism safely and sustainably", then your advice is excellent.

Re: Who has advice for an alcoholic?

(Anonymous) - 2015-04-18 21:46 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Who has advice for an alcoholic?

(Anonymous) - 2015-04-18 21:54 (UTC) - Expand

Measure what you drink in units.

Even if you can't contemplate cutting down now, it can help you be aware how much you're drinking, and give you a baseline to reduce from if/when you're up to it.

It sounds like a small thing, but measuring rather than swigging from a bottle or pouring random amounts into a glass can begin to give you feeling of control, maybe especially if you start doing it without any pressure on yourself to stick below a certain figure.

cracked has some really good, honest articles about it, especially from John Cheese, who managed to quit.

I don't know your situation, but my mom always drank when she was under stress- for example, when organizing my birthday parties as a child. It made me wish that we wouldn't celebrate them, because she was drunk in front of my friends. I still feel guilty for that shame, because she wanted to make it really nice, not just pretend it for superficial reasons, but I couldn't help it.
Try not to do that. Be honest with what you can handle. Get help.

Get professional help. Don't try to do this on your own. It'll sound tempting because admitting you need help is embarrassing for a lot of people and it's a fantasy that people should pull themselves up by their own bootstraps, but seriously, there is no shame is needing help.

Try to be as kind and caring for yourself as you would be for someone you love.

If you want to quit,, get help. I stopped drinking a few years ago after I nearly destroyed my life. I was dealing with chronic pain and ptsd, I couldn't get a job because I was too much of a fuck up, all of the money I was getting was going to alcohol rather than the shit it needed to, I made some choices that alienated most of my family, I nearly wrecked my relationship with my partner. Everything was fucked up.

Most of us get drunk to deal with other shit going on. I needed a lot of help to deal with everything else before I could quit. Without my partner to support me, and without people pressuring me into therapy and AA, I'd probably be dead in a ditch somewhere now.

Besides the advice to getting professional help, I'd also suggest finding a sober buddy or sponsor. I know AA isn't everyone's cup of tea, but go once or twice to find some people. They'll give you their numbers, and if you find the right person they seriously will always answer and be there for you. Seriously it's amazing sometimes the lengths they'll go to for you and the resources they have. I'd recommend finding a someone who's been sober at least 10 to 20 years though.

Also realize it's a slow process, and you're liable to slip up. Don't beat yourself up, just pick up and start again.

If you can't deal with AA's focus on god/religion, there is Secular Organizations for Sobriety: http://www.sossobriety.org/

I'm a recovering alcoholic. I have a little over 14 years clean. Advice:

* Find sober people. AA, group therapy, chatting people up at the coffee shop, homeless people who don't drink that hang out at the park - whatever. Hang with them, even if you're not willing to get sober yourself. We get so wrapped up in our addiction that we forget a whole world exists out there with people who aren't destroying themselves. It's good to be reminded of that outside world.

* I second medical help if you want to get sober, or if you can't reach that, find free group therapy (AA or secular, non-religious 12 step programs.) You can google or even look at Meetup.com for them.

* The biggest thing - don't die. Sobriety, active addiction, whatever, it's all negotiable. Death is not. Keep yourself safe enough to get it (sobriety) when you're ready.

Good luck. Addiction is a horrible thing, but you're not alone. Tons of us ex drunk-junkies out there.

Kill themselves.

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