fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3498 ]

[ SECRET POST #3498 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3498 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 32 secrets from Secret Submission Post #500.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
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catharsis time my darlings

When I was severely depressed in high school, and no one knew it. Everyone thought I was just lazy. And at one point my parents, trying to be helpful, told me they'd be okay with me not going to college and that maybe college wasn't the right path for me. It wasn't meant to be hurtful, but it really felt that way to me.

That sucks. :(

People trying to be nice but essentially saying "I don't believe in you" is the worst. :( <3

"you coming out is exactly like when your mother had a miscarriage"

bonus: he said it twice!

Oh my gods.

I'm sorry anon. :(

What a vile thing to say. Fuck him.

A couple weeks ago my uncle told me I shouldn't even be in college cause I'm getting a useless degree, and I'm not going anywhere in my life. I'm going to be graduating in a few months, so its too late to tell me that anyway.

Also my mother calls me manipulative and yells at me whenever I cry around her, and that always hurts too.

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

a_potato - 2016-08-02 00:34 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

sarillia - 2016-08-02 00:35 (UTC) - Expand

It...doesn't seem so bad, comparatively speaking, but:

"Don't worry, I'll try not to let it bother me."

It was said to me by my boyfriend when I was 16, after I told him that I loved him.

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 00:36 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

sparrow_lately - 2016-08-02 00:48 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 03:04 (UTC) - Expand

Can't remember. So it clearly wasn't that effective.

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 00:40 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 00:43 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

herpymcderp - 2016-08-02 00:47 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

sarillia - 2016-08-02 00:55 (UTC) - Expand

When my grandmother saw me snacking a bit one night after dinner and told me I should watch what I eat because I will blow up.

Mind you, at the time I weighed 115 lbs (I'm now about 120 lbs, so really not a noticeable difference), and I had eaten THREE 90 CALORIE CHEWY BARS!!!

It's become a family joke now, but I was really hurt at the time.

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

sparrow_lately - 2016-08-02 00:49 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

shortysc22 - 2016-08-02 00:55 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 01:08 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 04:07 (UTC) - Expand

"You're an ugly cow. You're an intelligent child who fucks up everything she touches." My dad's got a way with words.

Alt option would be whatever was said that time my mother lied to the police about me!

Edited 2016-08-02 00:51 (UTC)

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

a_potato - 2016-08-02 00:58 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

sparrow_lately - 2016-08-02 01:00 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 01:09 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 01:13 (UTC) - Expand

"I have to go, Supernatural is on."

I'd just told her another friend of mine was dying.

(In all honesty, I don't think she was trying to be cruel. I don't think she really knew how to respond, so she decided to get off the phone before she said something dumb. I never confided in her again after that, though.)

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

sparrow_lately - 2016-08-02 00:52 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 01:02 (UTC) - Expand

From my mom--a tie between that I'm like a fat tick on her back, and that I'm heartless and can't love.

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

sparrow_lately - 2016-08-02 01:26 (UTC) - Expand

That I'm ugly.
That I'm a loser.
That nobody wants me around.

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 03:08 (UTC) - Expand

Off the top of my head? maybe the couple of times my brother (several years ago, I think he has grown up a lot since then) used my mental illness as a clobbering stick to try to shut me up or make me feel bad. Also made disparaging comments about my previous relationship while knowing how upset I was about the breakup ("I don't know what [ex] ever saw in you!").

I think there are worse things but not things I want to think about. I'm in a pretty good mood so I'm gonna leave it at that.

My mom would follow me into the kitchen whenever I went there and make mooing noises at me whenever I made something to eat. It got so bad that while living there I'd be eating one sandwich a day and nothing else and still getting the cow noises.

I had a hysterical crying fit when I moved out and realized for the first time that no one cared what I ate and that I could eat like a normal person. I still hate eating in front of other people though. I'm always waiting for them to make fun of me for eating.

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 02:08 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 03:03 (UTC) - Expand

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Some back story:

My father literally never spoke to me as a child unless it was to tell me what to do or tell me what I had done wrong (everything, and I had already fucked up if he had to tell me what to do, because he thought I should do everything without needing to be told). I didn't get any physical or emotional or verbal affection from him until I was a grown adult, and before that he never paid attention to me at all except to command or punish me (hitting or yelling at me). I have had chronic depression since I was a teen, I've self-injured almost all my life, absolutely terrible record of relationships, the list of ways his lack of love and affection toward me has hurt me goes on and on.

But since I've been an adult, he's changed a lot and is now a much warmer person. That said, we recently had this conversation:

Him, talking about his two new cats: ...They've learned so much already, I'm really proud of them.
Me, slightly teasing: Wow, that's something I've never heard you say before.
Him: *spluttering* I've always been proud of you!
Me: What?! Since when??
Him: Since the beginning. I was always telling people how proud of you I was.
Me: Well, you never said that to me.

And he said: Well, I didn't want you to get a big head.

I'm sitting there, my arms and legs covered in scars that I inflicted on myself, one suicide attempt under my belt, two horribly abusive relationships, my shame and self-hatred threaten to choke me to death some nights, I'm in my 40s and will never marry or have a family of my own...but, hey, at least he saved me from having a big head.

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 02:11 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 02:22 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 12:56 (UTC) - Expand

Whatever it was my dad said to make me self-conscious about my teeth in primary school, probably. I can't really remember it, but I still don't show my teeth when I smile most of the time, so it obviously had a pretty major (negative) influence on me :/

"you don't know how to love; you only pretend to love people when you want something." (from my mother)

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

sadiesockmonkey - 2016-08-02 06:23 (UTC) - Expand

"Your face is such a joke."--my father

"You're not a real lesbian" "you weren't really sick" "you never do anything with your hair so why are you upset (about all my hair falling out)" "you're the heaviest so you should sit in front"

:( :( :(

Edited 2016-08-02 05:40 (UTC)

My mother once told me something along the lines of:

"If you get raped, don't come crying to me." or "I won't care if you get raped."

I was 12. She said it to win an argument forcing me to go visit a historical site with stone masonry, which her ancestors had worked on, supposedly.

I was 12 and wanted to stay in the motel where there was TV and an outdoor pool and I had books to read. My dad sided with her after she pulled that trump card out of her pocket.

I'm 23 now and I've talked about it in therapy and with friends numerous times, but it never stops hurting when I think about it. It's just about the most awful thing I can imagine saying to your own child. The most absurd part is that she didn't trust me to take care of myself in a motel room alone at 12 and, if I'd gone swimming, effectively use a key to the room, but I'd been a latchkey kid starting at the age of 8.

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 17:31 (UTC) - Expand

in elementary school there was a party, people were dancing and I was too, next to the popular girls - I was just having fun. one of the teachers went around and gave candy to the girls for dancing so well, she then turned to me and said "I guess you were there too". she had noticed I didn't belong to the group and felt the need to point it out.

it's hard to explain why it hurt so much, I never quite belonged in school.

I also almost had sex with a guy, like up to trying to penetrate, it hurt and then something happened so we stopped. sometime later we had a completely unrelated fight and he said smth like "did you think your squealing was attractive?"

Re: What is the most hurtful thing ever said to you?

(Anonymous) - 2016-08-02 22:07 (UTC) - Expand

Oh! And one time I said I couldn't go to a dinner thing cause was going to a another dinner and one of the dudes messaged me to ask me why I "really" wasn't going so again. Hanging with other circle of friends and he was like "lol no you're not come to this" and kept pestering me

Just. Rude and hurtful. I don't like it when ppl say I don't have other friends. Old insecurities even though I've got fuck loads of friends and acquaintances and best friends and I'm pretty emotionally secure in all of them.

Reminded because he just messaged me to ask how's it going which means he's organising a thing and idk I can see that old convo right there so not super keen.

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