[ SECRET POST #3582 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3582 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.



__________________________________________________



02.
[Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries]


__________________________________________________



03.
[Daredevil, Wilson Fisk/Vanessa Marianna]


__________________________________________________



04.
[Overwatch]


__________________________________________________



05.
[Mob Psycho 100]


__________________________________________________



06.
[Malcolm in the Middle]


__________________________________________________



07.


__________________________________________________



08.













Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 39 secrets from Secret Submission Post #512.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: narrative question

[(Anonymous)]

I'm unclear as to whether the bulk of the story is in 1st or 3rd person. If it's in 3rd, you can swap POVs for the scene easily via scene breaks. If it's in 1st, you can still swap POVs for the scene by scene breaking and giving it a title such as "Interlude," and maybe italicizing it.

This is assuming the scene is absolutely essential and not a darling you should murder. I like the solution of the person above who said "have the behavior change and the character have to figure out why."

Re: narrative question

[(Anonymous)]

"If it's in 1st, you can still swap POVs for the scene by scene breaking and giving it a title such as "Interlude," and maybe italicizing it."

Ehhhh. Tbh, OP's idea of "surprise, MC is gay!" twist is already a tad heavy-handed as a way to bring the MC and his friend together. Making a fuss over the scene and setting it off with italics or as an "interlude" is only going to make that more conspicuously out of place.

Re: narrative question

[(Anonymous)]

It's not a twist/surprise for the reader. Earlier scenes establish MC is bi, and trying to process whether Friend is into guys and if telling him will hurt their friendship and their work relationship (this part is v. important, because it's not just their interests, but their employers', and the media and the public eye is on them all the time).

A majority of the story actually even takes place after MC and this friend have broken up romantically (time skips, as I said), but they still have to work together. There's snapshots of the period they were together, but they're all in the past, sort of a "how did we get to here?" I liked my scene as an idea of one of those snapshots/vignettes, but it doesn't quite fit right.

Re: narrative question

[(Anonymous)]

Sorry, I shouldn't have used the word "twist". What I meant was that sometimes when plots that involve a misunderstanding/miscommunication that serves as an obstacle between two people and their romantic relationship, it's common (and a little cliché) to have this ridiculously simple missing puzzle piece that makes everything okay and knocks that obstacle down. In this situation, the puzzle piece is "MC is actually bi and friend didn't know it".

The reason why I said these devices were a little unsubtle was that unless the writing is very good, it's super obvious that this is a contrived obstacle engineered by the author, an easy obstacle that's easily overcome with just one teensy bit of information. This isn't to say it's a bad idea, just that it's probably a good idea NOT to draw any more attention to it than absolutely necessary.

Re: narrative question

[(Anonymous)]

Okay, that makes sense. There is more to it than that, involving the secrecy of the relationship-- I'm the same anon who was asking for some thoughts on issues involving closeted characters a few weeks ago.

Basically, in the grand scheme of the story, this is unimportant for plot reasons (as you say, getting together is not that big an obstacle), but years later the boyfriend still finds that scene significant for emotional reasons because the older brother was his mentor and it's the last thing he told him before he moved on.

So I'm torn between something that's better-structured and YES THE FEELS.

Re: narrative question

[(Anonymous)]

If it's in 1st, you can still swap POVs for the scene by scene breaking and giving it a title such as "Interlude,

This^.

I mean, yes, doing something like this probably does bring down the quality of the writing a little bit. But unless you've arbitrarily decided to hold yourself to a particularly high writing standard, then I say go for it.

In my opinion, this is one of those instances where fanfic calls for something different than original published fiction would. If you were writing original published fiction, I suspect your editor would say to make the scene fit smoothly and cohesively into the narrative or else drop it. Because that's the kind of rule professional writing tends to hold itself to quite strictly.

But what makes fanfic enjoyable for the majority of readers is typically more about giving the reader the emotional payoff they want. And it sounds like the scene you're grappling with will strongly contribute to doing that for the reader. To axe it for the sake of "better writing" would be to put the principles of original, professional-caliber writing ahead of the principles of fanfic writing.

Re: narrative question

[(Anonymous)]

True, fanfic readers don't want good writing as much as feels.

DA

[(Anonymous)]

And that's ok.