fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #4171 ]

[ SECRET POST #4171 ]

⌈ Secret Post #4171 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 21 secrets from Secret Submission Post #597.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

How should I organize a baby shower for someone when I hate half of my sister's friends? They are okay people, I just don't like them.

The same way as if you really liked them all. It isn't about you, it's about the expectant mom and her friends having a good time and laughing and bonding.

Yeah, this. Step one, it's NOT about you. Being a good sister - or a good friend - means you are doing this for them.

I don't even get what you mean, honestly. Being an adult is about getting along and being civil, even friendly with people you don't necessarily enjoy. Unless they are truly evil people who have personally hurt you in unforgivable ways... get over it?

Yep, this.

Why do you hate them so much if they're okay people tho

Plan the shower your sister and her friends will enjoy. Escape to be busy in the kitchen with hostess duties periodically if they're squealing or talking about you being next or something.

Make the desserts in unpopular or controversial flavors, like licorice.

Don't be that kind of sister.

What?! No! This is exactly the petty kind of stuff that will be brought up for years and if there isn't a divide between the sisters it could certainly create one. We may not get to chose our family but we can certainly choose how much or little their involved in our adult lives. Be the sister your sister wants in her life, OP. Don't be the petty bitch she avoids. Don't cut yourself off from your nieces/nephews before their even born. Be a sister and a friend and you'll get the same in return and so much more.

Come on, don't do that. Being a petty jerk and ruining someone's shower just because you don't like the guests? That's a huge asshole move.

Relatives should not throw showers.

Ask one of her friends to take over and then you extra don't have to be involved!

What? Since when? Where I'm from, it's always relatives - sisters or aunts, typically - who throw baby and bridal showers.

It's one of those etiquette things that most people either don't know about, or ignore completely, but ayrt is correct. Showers aren't supposed to be thrown by your family.

I've never heard that. I know that moms shouldn't throw this stuff, and brides shouldn't plan it themselves, but it seems to be more appropriate for family to plan these kinds of events, and friends to plan the bachelorette party.

Yeah it's an etiquette thing basically just so that it's not seen as a selfish gift grab from the Mother-to-be/bride, etc.

Huh. I guess it's different here. I've never been to a baby shower that wasn't planned at least partly by family. Then again, we only do small gifts. If you have one of those gift registry things with stuff that's all super expensive I could see it looking kind of tacky. I don't think I've seen anyone spend more than $30 or so on a gift unless it was parents buying a crib or stroller for their new grandchildren.

You do as good of a job as you can, just as you would if they were cool and you liked them a lot. This shower isn't about them, or you. It's about your sister. If you'd like her to have a nice time, suck it up and throw an awesome shower.

Was just in a similar situation; bachelorette party planning for a friend and I just ... DO NOT understand or like a few of her other friends. The mantra you use is:

This is a party I am throwing for my sister.
My sister enjoys her friends.
So I will throw a party where she and her friends can enjoy themselves.

And then find one thing you SUPER enjoy about the party to focus on. (For me, I love baking and food, so I threw myself into that. YAY! CAKE! is a sentiment you can share with pretty much anybody, no matter how little you have in common)

You presumably like the OTHER half of her friends. So concentrate on hostess-ing (this usually precludes much socializing anyway) and when you DO have a breather to enjoy the party, too, then hang out with YOUR SISTER, whom you love, and the friends of hers you DO like, and yeah, be polite and inclusive of the others because, fuck it, it's just one day and they're okay, after all.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #4171 ]

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