[ SECRET POST #4478 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4478 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.



__________________________________________________



02.


__________________________________________________



03.


__________________________________________________



04.


__________________________________________________



05.


__________________________________________________



06.


__________________________________________________



07.


__________________________________________________



08.


__________________________________________________



09.















Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 21 secrets from Secret Submission Post #641.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

05. https://i.imgur.com/ElHFWzN.png

[(Anonymous)]

Don’t you know? JKR planned everything years ago. She just chose not to include wizards shitting themselves or Nagini being a former human in the books. Everything she says is according to her keikaku and you can’t call yourself a fan if you don’t believe 100% in the Word of God.

[(Anonymous)]

The Jenny Nicholson bit, about how when JKR first scrawled her idea for Harry Potter on a napkin, she wrote down two things: "boy wizard lives in cupboard under stairs" and "snake is a Korean lady", is such a good bit

[kaijinscendre]

Great, now I gotta watch it AGAIN!

[morieris]

"It would make more sense if she was called...........Susannah Chandler!"

[(Anonymous)]

Wow, talk about a strawman.

[(Anonymous)]

I completely believe her about Nagini being a former human, though. Ever since Scabbers, I was prepared for any animal actually being a human. It would actually be weirder to me if she never once thought about Nagini having supernatural origins when writing the original book.

The wizards shitting themselves thing sounds like a joke, though. Is it not?

[(Anonymous)]

Harry has foreshadowing dreams and Ron’s made a prophetic joke or two. I think she wasn’t joking.

[(Anonymous)]

Even if Nagini is a human, the details surrounding her being a human don't make a ton of sense or add a ton to the setting.

And as far as I can tell the shitting thing is serious? It was definitely tweeted from the official Pottermore account and AFAIK nobody has indicated in any way that it was meant as a joke

[(Anonymous)]

How does that change it at all? She still came up with it, her social media team still re-upped it, and it's still ridiculous

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think it's ridiculous to magic away your poo. Sounds darned convenient to me. In fact, I don't know why wizards would ever deviate from that? Plumbing seems like more work for them.

[(Anonymous)]

That's not the only part people are laughing at. It's the whole relieving themselves wherever they stood bit.

[(Anonymous)]

One, shutting your pants and then vanishing it is both funny and absurd

Two, it adds nothing to the universe and creates a bunch of fun new questions like "why did they add plumbing? Do purebloods still vanish their shit as a status symbol? Do the Slytherin dungeons have toilets? Does Draco Malfoy know how to use a toilet?"

[(Anonymous)]

I've never understood why people freaked out about this. Plumbing, or lack thereof, in pre-modern times was pretty gross, as anyone who's watched Horrible Histories knows.

Unless the "evidence" was onlyvanished, and still hung around. That would be gross.

[(Anonymous)]

LOL, I never thought of that. Invisible but physical excrement. Yeah, that could become a problem relatively quickly, I imagine.

[morieris]

Now I'm imagining some poor wizard going "Aw bollocks, I stepped in invisible shit again."

[(Anonymous)]

You don't understand why people freak out at the idea of wizards shitting and pissing their pants where they stand? Uh, OK.

[(Anonymous)]

If the fucking Romans, who brushed their teeth with urine, could manage the idea of a sewer system, wizards have Zero Fucking Excuses.

[(Anonymous)]

If you truly don't get why it's freaky to shit your pants wherever it is you happen to be standing, then I feel very, very sorry for anyone who has to be around you on a regular basis.

[(Anonymous)]

I have nothing to add, but I agree completely, OP.

[(Anonymous)]

You crapped your pants in solidarity as you posted this, didn't you?

[(Anonymous)]

ffs it's not the timing of that particular piece of trivia, or any other ridiculous piece of trivia, it's the actual "fact" itself. I don't care when it was revealed or on which site, I care that it's absolutely stupid to think that "wizards shit themselves where they stand while Muggles have been digging latrines and using chamber pots since 2500 BC" is a quality way to solve the plot hole of "where was the entry to the Chamber of Secrets before plumbing was invented?"

if you want it in more general terms, I care that whatever else is said about the HP universe, usually in response to someone attempting to "gotcha" on a plot hole, just winds up being dumber than "I meant for things to be whimsical not realistic, calm down Karen." And I've said as much here before and someone even made it a secret for me once. It's a whimsical story about magic but every time she tries to plug a plot hole it just makes things dumber and less magical.

[(Anonymous)]

"It's a whimsical story about magic but every time she tries to plug a plot hole it just makes things dumber and less magical."

IA... if she'd shrugged and handwaved it nobody would have an issue. It's magic. The default fallback explanation is literally built-in.

[(Anonymous)]

The weirdest part to me is that a lot of people are jumping to "shitting their pants" when this information, while still moderately ridiculous, doesn't need to imply that at all.

[(Anonymous)]

I known that I keep my underwear and other clothing on while in class, but if your argument is that prior to installing plumbing, teachers and students frequently hiked up their robes and crapped or pissed into the wind before vanishing the evidence, then I stand corrected. That definitely makes more sense and isn’t ridiculous or needlessly gross at all.