fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #709 ]

[ SECRET POST #709 ]

⌈ Secret Post #709 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 17 pages, 416 secrets from Secret Submission Post #102.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 4 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

127. I remember my school actually seeing that movie as a class trip. We were all in our early teens, and loud and obnoxious throughout a good portion of the movie. But, you could hear a pin drop during that scene.

137. That's a joke, right? Because almost all the FF fans I know are girls. Try being a Devil May Cry, Soul Calibur and Prince of Persia female fan, then get back to me.

140. This secret made me happy. Rock on, OP.

157. Nice grammar there. -_- But yeah, I never really got into the series, either. I just... Never saw the appeal. And hell, I love G Gundam.

167. Wow... Way to not help your side of the argument. I was flinching too much from all the fake blood to take you seriously. Not to mention, while you are allowed to like your kink, people are allowed to think it's sick. Though, thinking a kink is gross (and yeah, I'll admit I find you kink fucking sick), and finding the person who has the kink gross are two separate things. I won't judge people based on their likes. I will, however, judge them based on their reactions to judgment in of itself.

173. I do find the "Bisexuality exists!" excuse really annoying sometimes. Because a blanket excuse should just not exist. It should be based on the each character separately. There are just some characters I could never see being anything but straight or gay. And then there are characters that could definitely be both. But yeah, it is rather sad that a person can write a character that is canonly straight (Hello, Maes Hughes), and make them gay without anyone questioning it. But grab a character from Gravitation and have them even just experiment, and fandom flies off the handle. Good times!

174. Troll or idiot. Either way, fail. "He could beat up him" discussions are just as overdone and lame as "He's screwing him" discussions. Find something decent to baw over.

Edited 2008-12-14 22:58 (UTC)

167. That's not what the OP is saying. OP is complaining about people who can't seem to separate someone's fantasy from the person themselves, i.e. someone who has rape fantasies =/= someone who actually wants to be raped for real.

It's fine to not like a kink because it hits your squick button. It is not okay to label someone who enjoys reading incest between two characters as, "Oh, so you must like fucking/want to fuck your brother in real life, too, huh, is that it?" or someone who enjoys reading a rape fic as, "Oh, so obviously you want to be raped, too." That's just a failure in logic.

Thing is, I agree with the OP, but I don't agree with how he/she portrayed it. It came off more as bitter than as informative. And then saying that other people apparently just have weak stomachs, by saying that what they find disturbing is "boring" to her. Yeeeeaaaah. STFU yourself there, OP. Maybe the OP has a high tolerance for disgusting things, but that doesn't make anyone else's squick factor weak or such. It's just a matter of tastes. So, the OP is coming off (IMHO, and should be taken as just that) just as judgmental as the people who misjudge her.

I agree.

Too many people refer to particularly controversial movie rape scenes as reference as to why I shouldn't or on occasion as an attempt to turn me off my kink. This happens with astonishingly annoying frequency.
In being at such a ridiculous end of the scale, these attempts bore me out of my mind because they are showing some of very mild explicitness with only very minor sadism to a gurofaggot so far off the deep end a looking at missing limb is like looking at a paper cut.
Because it disturbs the weak stomached people who find my kink horrible they repeatedly expect me to be disturbed by something which roughly equates to children's television in comparison to my usual reading material.
I am a judgmental douche, I know people have squick factors much lower than mine, my point was something along the lines of 'just because it squicks you does not mean it will turn me off my kink'.

In being at such a ridiculous end of the scale, these attempts bore me out of my mind because they are showing some of very mild explicitness with only very minor sadism to a gurofaggot so far off the deep end a looking at missing limb is like looking at a paper cut.
Because it disturbs the weak stomached people...
I am a judgmental douche...

Yeah, pretty much. And that's why I have a hard time sympathizing with you, at all. Actually, now that you just replied to me, whatever sympathy I did have is entirely gone.

You're angry that people judge you based on your kink, but then judge them right back based on their gore tolerance. It's a ridiculously hypocritical situation, and now I can't even say I care very much for your viewpoint. You want people to not judge you while you freely judge them? Oh,PLEASE.

I don't give two shits how I'm judged, however a friend of mine has had someone call the police on them because they had guro on their computer.
I enjoy being a freak and scaring people shitless, if I didn't I'd friends lock my LJ and not post 90 percent of my art.
I'm a very, very bitter individual who is extremely pissed at a large amount of people for harassment of extremely good friends of mine.

Though certain people rocking up to my LJ going on about me being a misogynistic, male chauvinist pig and going to hell for this and saying so and so will turn me off this shit forever does get extremely annoying when people do it three times a week and are not trolls.

(I'm a 'equal-opportunity asshole' I accept any judgmental bullshit that is directed at me and direct similar treatment back. I will make fun of all religions, genders, psychological disorders, sexual orientations, weights, ect. and thus do not give a rats ass at what is directed at me.)

So, let me get this straight. You apparently act like a total ass to everyone you meet, swear you don't give a damn about what anyone thinks of you, and yet you still make a secret stating how people shouldn't judge your kink.

Baaaaaw more, hypocrite. *lol* Now you're just being silly.

I made a secret on how they shouldn't judge people on /their/ kink.

My kink doesn't exist as far as people are concerned and thus they don't and can't judge me on it until they even know it exists.

But it's still your kink, too. And you seem to be awful self righteous about how people shouldn't judge it, while you think it's perfectly all right to judge other people. It's bullshit to be unashamedly judgmental, and then state how other people shouldn't judge.

Basically: Pot. Kettle. Black.

Not particularly, I wouldn't particularly care if I was judged on it. Who knows how they'd manage it when no one even believes it exists even if it is shoved in someones face they'll always think it's the rape kink or use the catch-all term of sadism and never actually catch it.

I judge a person's intelligence and nothing else in case you haven't noticed.
Consider the intelligence of referring to someone as a male chauvinist pig right under the big ass sign saying they're female.
Consider the intelligence of a person saying some rape scene where a woman is crying will turn someone off forever on the post where they write some girl being vivisected and raped and emphasizing her thoughts on how she doesn't want to die.
Consider the intelligence of someone saying video games will turn everyone into rapists and murders.
Consider the intelligence of saying everyone who likes slasher films is a murderer.

Now, try /not/ to judge these people's intellects.
Making fun of someones kink is entirely different from judging them, under the ruling of make fun of others as much as you make fun of yourself.

Now, consider the difference between judging someone as an idiot and judging someone as an incestuous, paedophilic, rapist/murder.

Hell, I'm drunk and I'm thinking more than you are.

Bah. You keep adding things to your argument that you never mentioned before. Your defensive behavior only reinforces the idea that you take the misjudgment just as personal as your friends do. After all, I'd doubt someone who "doesn't care" as much as you claim would bother making a secret unless they in fact did care.

Here's the sweet and sour facts of life: People will judge you on anything and everything (Which I'm sure you'll state you already know. In which case, stop acting like a whining child about it.).

Bitch, moan, and complain all you want. Whine about their intellects (or lack thereof) until you're blue in the face, or drunk off your ass (which you claim to be). It won't stop them from judging everything you do.

That's human nature. It's a survival instinct. We judge people because, in a very primitive fashion, we're trying to figure out if that person is safe to be around. If they're someone we'd be comfortable being in proximity to.

Whether their judgment has a ring of truth in it or not, that is how just about everyone in the world is in some way, shape, or form.

Obviously, not all judgments are fair. Some of them are ridiculous. Thinking a person's kink corresponds to whether or not they're a good person is outlandish. Does it happen? Yes. Will it always happen? YES.

Suck it up, kid. Life's not fair.

You can't expect people to understand every aspect of you and your friends' lives. Especially when it involves something that, in mainstream society, is severely frowned upon. Especially since most of mainstream society is not into fandom, and therefore are even more out of the loop of such ideas. People judge your friends based on a kink that includes immoral acts. What a shock! You can't really expect most people to try to relate to it, can you? It's not exactly a fluffy bunny kink, and being bitter over people looking down upon it is a bit ridiculous.

I'm not denouncing your fetish. You like what you like, and I understand that it doesn't necessarily reflect on who you are as a person. But getting angry that people in general judge by what is considered by most a rather dubious kink is acting far too self-righteous.

Edited 2008-12-17 00:12 (UTC)

I care about my friends.

The peoples judgment of me is generally a delicious loli or the utterly batshit internet lurker with some of the most fucked up things out there -I accept these judgment because that is how I have chosen to be judged. I'm in a spot of social manipulation I can be anything I want people to think of me as. If I chose to be viewed as a furry I could make that so, if I chose to be viewed as a naive child I could make it so, I can be whatever I want a person to see me as and they don't know it.

Though honestly, I'm not bitter about people looking down on those kinks I am just bitter in general -misanthropy tends to do that.

My anger comes, always, from someone not doing the research. Not picking up on the most basic things of common sense. Human's will always single things out.
But what I have pointed out in the secret and multiple times in this conversation is the violence in tv and violence in video games arguments.

Yeah, but that's pretty much a strawman argument because nobody in this comm has ever said anythiing of the sort, and people who have said the kink is sick have still been attacked by defensive noncon fans.

1. There was a secret awhile back saying how someone found Wincest sick and said something along the lines of how they didn't think it was right to look at your brother and want to have sex with him and they were merging two characters having sex and the person enjoying incest wanting to have sex with their own sibling as the same thing.

Hell, there was someone a couple of days ago who posted a secret about pretending they were in Silent Hill and people immediately jumped in with, "Oh my God, are you retarded, why would you want to be raped and killed, you're obviously mental" as if this person having a fantasy about being in a certain setting meant that they wanted to be torn to shreds for real and that clearly, they're abnormal for having fantasies.

2. That aside, what does something being said in this comm or not have anything to do with it? Kinks exist outside of F!S. Kinks exist outside of internet. And people have expressed these views in my experience. Maybe it's not here and maybe you personally haven't seen any of it, but that doesn't mean it isn't out there.

3. Some people say the kink is sick and not for them, and that's fine. But others have phrased it in a way where it seems like they're accusing the person of being sick in the head themselves or that they want the same thing, which is not okay.

4. Not all people who enjoy noncon are automatically defensive just as not all people who don't enjoy these kinks are people who fail to understand the line between fantasy and reality. There are very level-headed people on both sides. So just because some kink fans have attacked those who feel the kink is sick doesn't legitimize the view that people who enjoy kinks are wrong and not normal.

1) I remember this instance, and the comment in question: It said "I can't handle incest because I can't read it without thinking about my own brother, and it squicks me out." I fail to see what's wrong with that, or how it qualifies.

Also, I don't see anything wrong with the question they asked, because in fact, they weren't implying reality: They were saying "Why would you fantasize about something like that, you're obviously mental." Reality remains irrelevent, here. They just can't comprehend how that could be someone's fantasy.

2) Because I thought I'd limit my statement to the context in which we're having this discussion, and I'm not so presumptuous as to assume I know everything that goes on outside of this community. I can only speak about what I know.

3) I can't ask this question without sounding rude or facetious, but why isn't it okay to be repulsed or confused by another person's fantasy to the point of thinking that there might be something wrong with them? The only assumption that's really being made there is that fantasies happen to come from somewhere. Personally, I don't think that everyone that has a fantasy that grosses me out is automatically fucked up, but I also think that even the most inoffensive fantasies have to come from somewhere and it's worth examining why you feel the way you feel.

To put it another way, it's a really volatile issue on both sides and I sympathize with people who have really strong initial reactions to fantasies that they can't understand. I don't think that they're being quite as judgemental as the people who have these fantasies think, because the people who have the fantasies are understandably defensive and nobody likes to be judged.

4) I never claimed that all were. But many are. Level-headed and defensive are not mutually exclusive, and it's quite possible to be both at once. People get defensive when they're being judged. It's just a human thing.

I never said the view was legitimized, but basically, you're just reinforcing my point: you're projecting. The view that the kink is wrong and not normal isn't one that's been widely espoused. Also, you could make a very good argument that it isn't exactly normal, but that's just a technical point really.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #709 ]

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