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Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2021-04-19 06:25 pm
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[ SECRET POST #5218 ]


⌈ Secret Post #5218 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 35 secrets from Secret Submission Post #747.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
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(Anonymous) 2021-04-19 10:46 pm (UTC)(link)
I feel the same way about losing my dream career.

(Anonymous) 2021-04-20 07:44 am (UTC)(link)
Hugs if you want them nonny.

(Anonymous) 2021-04-19 10:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Oof, I felt this. I got a degree in drama but due to my abusive upbringing (which included years of isolation and me believing nothing good was possible for me) and the world going to hell, I just gave up. I had no connections and had no idea how to make any without feeling like a burden on anyone else. I never got that validation I needed, though in retrospect, I don't think any amount of validation would have fixed my fucked up background and PTSD. Still, there are days I feel I took the coward's way out instead of throwing myself out there. And now I'm stuck in a job I don't enjoy but feel like I can't leave because it's safe (for now), but it wouldn't matter if I left now because I'm a middle-aged woman and the industry doesn't have any use for middle-aged women wanting to break into the industry. I get heartsick knowing on all the stuff I missed out on, and all the stuff I will never get to do. And it really sucks knowing I did this all to myself.

teal deer; Sorry for the rant, just saying I get it.

(Anonymous) 2021-04-19 11:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Anon, you didn't do it to yourself. Other people did it to you, by abuse and neglect and refusing to take up their responsilities towards you.

Many people who succeed do so because of nepotism, or simple parental support or involvement. (My sister wrote a big article on success in training and apprenticeships, and that was her conclusion; she was pretty surprised when I pointed out that I'd had none of this, unlike herself who was our father's mini-me.)

I looked up an old school friend a few months ago; I remember her in pigtails. Don't do this, is my advice. She's now leader of the cancer team at a huge hospital. Which is great! ...Her father was a doctor.

It's hard to build on no foundation. The building just keeps slipping. Very few people manage that, and we tend to remember them as the greats.

You're doing well - you've got a job and can do it. Make the most of what you've got while you can is my advice. Enjoy yourself.

(Anonymous) 2021-04-20 07:43 am (UTC)(link)
Hot take here nonny, but say you did put yourself out there and the brutal acting industry tore an already vulnerable you to shreds and you ended up even more traumatised. Nonny you can never know. You might have had a lucky escape and never known it.

Can you take up amdram? You could get back into it that way and have fun with it with no pressure attached. All the best to you nonny.

(Anonymous) 2021-04-19 11:06 pm (UTC)(link)
Feel the same way about traveling. We only have so much time left.

(Anonymous) 2021-04-19 11:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Nah, honestly, anon.
As much as I do feel you in a sense (I mean you can't debut as a k-pop idol at 30-something and sometimes I feel kind of jealous of young children...) I know it's very much untrue for most fields in the 21th century.

Nowadays we can publish stuff anonymously online where no publisher has to know our identities - so they never mattered so little in comparision to what we do :) We can throw something amazing into the world and live off revenue and never publicly reveal our names. More than ever before we have freedom to experiment and show what we want to and people will like it if they like it because: Internet bro. So. Yeah. I don't think identity has ever mattered so little and it's certainly horrible in a sense, but in another... the freedom to create is very welcome personally.

I can't be a k-pop idol anymore but I know I can independently produce a local "k-pop inspired" group if I want to - and you can produce your own movies too.

Sure, it's different from "sigh, why wasn't I famous and relevant at 20!" - guess what, most people weren't - but when it comes to creating I feel so free - maybe more now than I did when I was younger :)

(Anonymous) 2021-04-20 04:34 am (UTC)(link)
As a career, yes, it's very difficult to get into because so many people want to do it and most of them won't (and many of those who do have wealth or connections or both).

As a hobby, what's stopping you? What elements of film-making do you want to do most?

(Anonymous) 2021-04-20 04:34 am (UTC)(link)
Don't give up, anon.

Look, maybe you won't be the next Stephen Spielberg, but you might be the next big indie hit, or maybe you'll make the next viral mini-movie.

There's more than one way to achieve your dreams.

(Anonymous) 2021-04-20 09:16 am (UTC)(link)
SA. Motivational video on this!

https://twitter.com/andrewhuang/status/1384244468262477829

You are never too old to make art.
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