fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #5282 ]

[ SECRET POST #5282 ]

⌈ Secret Post #5282 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 22 secrets from Secret Submission Post #755.
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06. https://i.imgur.com/g9hz54i.png

Same! I think that's why I really like certain forms of Soulmate AUs/ABO/Or even just fics where the character is [Character name]-sexual only. I am under the ace umbrella as well.

Yeah! Like... there are characters that I don't see as ace-spec but in OTPs I have with them I still feel a little rubbed the wrong way by going into their pasts if they don't have some other kind of repression that's kept them from forming other deep romantic/sexual relationships, because I'm just too ace to understand being horny for multiple people.

But I do have a lot of ships where I do feel like at least one half is ace-spec.

I'm just too ace to understand being horny for multiple people.

OP - I'm cackling because, uh, same? I mean, yeah, I don't think me being ace (and vibing super hard with demisexuality despite not actually being demi myself) is the ONLY factor in why I headcanon my OTPs the way I do. But it's definitely a big part of it.

I mean, I understand being horny for multiple people in the abstract sense (and I would hope I didn't have to even say this, but obviously I think it's 100% cool if someone has sex--safely--with a lot of people, or is just horny for a lot of people). But it's not something I can vibe with, at all. My understanding of it is purely abstract.

It really depends on the character for me. For me I mostly want the character to feel IC. For some characters, I think this is absolutely true and they only have eyes for one person. But for other characters, they can look around and lust even if they only love one person because they can mentally separate sex and love. And then there are still other characters who can have multiple true loves in their life. And then others who never have true love, don't even want love, and just enjoy sex a lot.

Ooh, I do this haha. I think that's natural when you have an OTP! Of course you only want them to have life-changing feelings and mind-bending sex with each other! I don't know why we're supposed to be all caught up on the "realism" of something anyway. Isn't that the entire point of fiction, to indulge in fantasy?

I don't know why we're supposed to be all caught up on the "realism" of something anyway. Isn't that the entire point of fiction, to indulge in fantasy?

OP - I agree. Fanfic especially becomes a lot more fun when you embrace the "I like what I like" mentality. :)

Yup. I mean, I'm picking fanfic for my pairing because I want them together not to hear about their other exploits

This would so depend on the story for me. If I'm reading a story for a pairing and they're endgame, then I don't mind them having other encounters so long as:

- It makes emotional sense as part of the story; and
- I don't have to actually read any details about the other pairings lusting after each other or hooking up unless there's a valid narrative reason to go into that.

It depends on the characters for me. If they canononically have had past lovers then it won't bug me if they're referenced or spoken about, but I wouldn't say I'd want to read in-depth about those escapades. But for the most part I'm very similar to you: I want them to be each other's Ones because I like that kind of thing in fiction.

OP - Yeah, I feel this. I don't need to erase or bash the character's exes (or canonical LI's). I can accept that the character genuinely loved someone else in the past, and that the relationship was meaningful to them, and is still meaningful to them to some degree. Though as ever, it also depends on the character and the canon. With some characters I prefer to headcanon that they've never been truly in love.

I think you're a victim of purity culture. There's nothing wrong with having and satisfying a need for sex outside of a long-term relationship. The body wants to exercise.

ooooo, this fucking bugs me. While this could be the reason, it also can be something very different like projection of sexuality/OP's own relationship with sex

I guess this statement just bothers me because I'm similar to OP, but I'm well aware that my preference toward it has to do with my sexuality (being asexual) than purity culture.

OP implied their OTPs all have satisfying sex with each other, only. That's purity culture in a nutshell.

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(Anonymous) - 2021-06-22 23:47 (UTC) - Expand

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(Anonymous) - 2021-06-23 00:08 (UTC) - Expand

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(Anonymous) - 2021-06-23 01:35 (UTC) - Expand

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meadowphoenix - 2021-06-23 03:37 (UTC) - Expand

While I would agree in some cases, I don't think it's the case with this OP because they're fine if the characters have sex outside their OTP because they physically enjoy it. That's kind of the opposite of purity culture, where the OTP would be 100% totally fulfilled by the other person all the time and never have looked at anyone else.

‘Satisfying a need outside of a long term relationship?’ Sounds like an excuse a cheater would say. Yikes! OP isn’t a victim of ‘purity culture’. They have standards.

Anyway, OP, that seems logical. When you ship an OTP, you expect things about that specific pairing. No third character should get in the way, or else the acronym loses its meaning.

OP has a fictional preference, that is fairly common among OTP type shippers, that isn't purity culture, it's them having a particular thing they like.

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2021-06-23 02:25 (UTC) - Expand

This is like saying

Person A: I prefer Apples, they're really satisfying to my taste and could happily just have apples.

Person B: Uh - there's other fruits other than apples you know. This is blatant apple propaganda that erasing the existence of the fact that people like fruits like pears and oranges.

Wft?
Sounds like "purity culture" OP has no idea what purity culture actually is. Most people don't "satisfy a need for sex outside of a long term relationship" unless they're cheating, or unless there is clear consent and boundaries set on both sides for an "open" relationship.
"Purity culture" is more about abstaining from sex before marriage and general abstinence not just wanting to have sex with the one you're in a long term relationship with.

Anyway, original OP, I agree with you. I don't want to read about my OPs lusting after anyone else other than the ones they're interested in. I don't care how unrealistic it is ;).
(I don't identify anywhere on the asexual scale btw)

Oh, fuck off.

(Not, OP, just another anon who has clear preferences for the way she likes her romance stories, but would die on the fucking hill for everybody elses' right to have as much sex as they want with whoever they please).

uhhh, I think you're too into fandom discourse. For example, I'm completely on OP's side and I come from the old old fandom times and the current purity culture annoys me. If anything, I'm a mad-jealous type and think my otp should be with each other, period, and everyone else can get lost. (Either you're a troll or just latched onto the 'demisexual' part of the secret, tied it to tumblr and jumped to conclusions.)

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2021-06-23 17:20 (UTC) - Expand

Nope, it's not purity culture. Just your aphobia rearing its head.

This is honestly really common, OP, and you can see it in historical romance novels and frankly, in fairy tales. I personally think a lot of this is the anxiety of choosing a partner, when multiple partners could be fulfilling in similar ways. It's a calmer OTP experience, when that OTP does not have the choice of such a conflict.

I can easily headcanon my OTP being unable to have fulfilling romantic relationships with other people, but if it’s sex that challenges believability too much. Especially when canon often contradicts it.

Nah, the REAL unrealistically romantic headcanon is believing your OTP would choose to be together even when the sex is bad or nonexistent (when neither of them is ace at that).

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