fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #6611 ]

[ SECRET POST #6611 ]

⌈ Secret Post #6611 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Artemis Pebdani of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia"]

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Notes:

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Content warnings: pedophilia, school shootings, disturbing themes

So here's the thing...I teach high school literature in the American South and I'm convinced, in my heart and gut, that one of my teenage male students is a sociopath. His eyes are cold, no light in them. That sounds cliche but when you see that gaze in real life, that's the only way to describe it. You can tell, in a really gross intuitive way, that he gets off on upsetting female teachers. It's amusing for him. Deeply satisfying. He smirks and practically preens when he angers, saddens or scares adult women. He's brilliant, and bored by everything that isn't chaotic or harmful. His Dad is a cop, and every time he acts up, the admin at my school massages it away. But I'm scared of him. Truly. He looked up child porn on a school computer, and said he did it for fun, to see if he could. Why wasn't he expelled? I don't know, and I'm so angry and feel so helpless. He doesn't even need my class to graduate, doesn't even want to be in it, but won't switch out. I think it's because he knows he bothers me, and he's having fun with that.
At this point, I have a handful of months with him, and I'm dreading it. How do I survive this? How does one deal with an adolescent psychopath?

sounds like a kid who knows he can get away with things BECAUSE his dad's a cop

This feels beyond FS's paygrade to provide assistance with. I'd advise against taking actions recommended to you by random internet anons. Do you know anyone who's a lawyer or something that could help you with your legal options re: the admin?

Yeah, this, probably.

I agree, you need advice from someone familiar with the system you're working within.

Call CPS. Just explain the situation and they might be able to advise a course of action. They might not, but there is absolutely no harm in calling and talking to them.

I’m just commenting to help make this wall of triggery text collapse.

You need to talk with the other teachers at your school. It doesn't matter whether he's actually a psychopath or not, it matters that his behavior is terrible. And if he can look up child porn on a school computer, that's a serious criminal issue. Don't talk to admin, talk to teachers. Talk to child welfare if you need to, and especially if he showed anyone else.

If you have proof he looked up child porn, contact the FBI. He can get in huge trouble for that, and if he does that may very well take care of the problem of putting up with him in your class.

(If the thread contains spoilery/triggery content please warn/post as 2nd comment so it collapses!
Please collapse images, too!)

tl;dr YTA

They did put a CW on the top of their comment, so I think it falls under "warn/post as 2nd comment" if you take it as an either/or. I do prefer when people collapse triggery comments, but as long as they put the warning at the top so I know to scroll if I'm not feeling it, it's okay.

Post had a very clear warning at the top. It's not op's fault if you failed to read it.

You can't diagnose sociopathy or psychopathy in adolescents, that is because the way the human brain forms. Too many false positives.

You can brand a kid a real bad seed, if you want; I'd call it very unprofessional to do that, but you can if you want. Probably what they need is a good role model, and that is part of your job, so keep on teaching them to the best of your ability including in basic empathy. More teens and tweens could do with lessons in basic empathy anyway.

What should you do if you still have concerns? You've already talked to your principal, and presumably the kid's parents. What you do is document every single interaction you have. Document it on paper. Write it down. Keep it dispassionate and judgement and value free, stick to the facts not the appearance off the facts. Speak to your union rep about it. Speak to an employment lawyer if you have to. And, if worst comes to worst, change schools. You're a goddamn adult, you can get a different job if you want.

Are you new to teaching? Do you think you are the first teacher to be trolled by a student? This is not the first kid who discovered the joy of making teach or coach uncomfortable, they certainly will not be the last. They won't even be the last you'll have. In fact if you've only one in your current cohort, you are doing better than most high schools. Adolescents push boundaries and try to provoke emotional reactions, that is just the nature of the beast.

Do your damn job, get them to graduation and then forget about them.

I hope you're not speaking from experience, or if you are, I hope you've quit being a teacher, because this is not the way a good teacher would respond to a comment like this. And with all due respect, you probably got trolled more than most teachers because even your more decent students didn't like you.

A teacher's job is not to be liked by their pupils, it is to get them the best marks they can get in the subject at hand. No more, no less. Teenagers need a firm hand, with clear boundaries, and that is pretty much all they need from their teacher.

It's not a teacher's job to be liked by everyone, but if a large number of their students don't like them, the most probable reason is that they're not a good teacher. Making people dislike you creates an environment that's more difficult to learn in, and it IS a teacher's job to facilitate learning.

That's a broad generalization that doesn't match my own experience as a teacher and a student. Some students need to find their teacher likeable to be motivated to work, some just don't care and will do well in any environment, some won't put in the work even if they're interested in class, some won't work any way because you represent some form of authority but will be friendly and such outside school, some don't care about you as a person but have to find your classes enjoyable or suitable to their way of learning, and so on. Add to that that it depends which age your students are, how your school system works, what kind of environment students have at home, etc. In my country, there is a direct correlation between your social background and how successful you will be at school than no other factors can mitigate.

And a good teacher doesn't think they're competent at diagnosing psychopathy in teens. There's a lot to unpack in OP and AYRT's posts but drawing baseless conclusions like you do isn't a good answer either.

There are two types of people in the world.

You're the type who thinks everyone else should suffer because it's the status quo and god forbid someone else's lack of suffering should somehow take away from your personal experience.

I'd try very hard not to react the way he wants you to, so as not to reward him. Be boring, don't act shocked or scared. Watch some cop interrogations on YouTube and see how they listen to people's confession of murder and worse without batting an eye. They adapt a demeanor of polite but mild interest. You can be politely disinterested, as if you're listening to your neighbor's anecdote about their hemorrhoid trouble.

Document every incident with dates and times, stating only the facts of what happened - NOT your feelings or opinions. Not because your feelings and opinions are invalid, but because you want the evidence to read like a report. Keep this record just in case.

If your school has a counselor, maybe speak to them regarding your concerns about the student without mentioning any diagnosis labels. Describe his behavior, and the cp search. Maybe drop a mention of the school's liability, having such a thing on their computers.

Agree with this comment.

A lot of arrogant teenagers and young adults get a huge ego boost from getting a big reaction, especially people in positions of power said teens/YAs think they are better than.

Simply staying quiet with a passive face can often disarm them because they realize they can't get anything out of you.

I don't know the specifics, but try not to engage too much with this student, and when you do try to keep it surface level and cordial. You have to have a stone cold poker face.

And at the same time document everything because you never know when that will be needed. And I do hope you have resources to go for support with your emotional and mental health.
I hope there are other resources or people who can also be aware of this student. Of course you have to say it's for the student's wellbeing and safety, but mostly I'm hoping for your safety and others' safety.

Take him out first.

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[ SECRET POST #6611 ]

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