fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1174 ]

[ SECRET POST #1174 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1174 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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Comments here

I will do that, as soon as you can explain to me why you find whatever porn you do watch or read hot.

win

It's porn. Get over yourself.

You're not going to get a single answer, because all lesbians are different. In general, a person's taste in fanfic doesn't necessarily match their real life sexual orientation; I've known quite a few straight female femslashers and remember seeing a gay male one.

Just keep in mind that human sexuality is complicated, especially when it comes to fantasies.

You sound 14.

Well-written sex is hot, no matter what equipment's involved.

Exactly! :D

Uh... how about no?

Re: 146

wolfie.livejournal.com - 2010-03-24 03:06 (UTC) - Expand

Re: 146

marsdragon.livejournal.com - 2010-03-24 20:50 (UTC) - Expand

totally agree

I see the judgment fest is already beginning, but...anon, I hear you. OMG. in my fandom there's a self-identified lesbian who has become obsessed with RPS involving men and men only. She's said that women 'gross her out' in smutfic. I am...confused as hell.

Sounds like she has some body issues to me. A lot of women find their own bodies disgusting; I don't see why being a lesbian would magically fix that.

It might just be that she hasn't come across any well-written smutfic featuring women; for a long time I avoided het and femmeslash because I couldn't seem to find a single writer who thought of the female body the way I do. Enough tries with enough different writers, it's easier to blame the problem on the one common factor than the thousand writers.

i'm pansexual so maybe this kind of thing is just hard for me to understand in general, but, i really don't get why a person's sexuality should correlate with the pairings they ship. you can think two people make a good couple without being sexually attracted to both of them, one of them, or even anyone of their gender. you can think they'd have hot sex. you can write/read said hot sex. hot sex is hot sex, pure and simple, and what people get off to in fantasy isn't necessarily what they desire in real life. sexuality's reaaaally not as black and white as people want it to be.

I've been involved in many a debate about this kind of thing, exactly, but from what I understand there are so many different reasons why women (and lesbians included in this obviously) find yaoi so appealing. There's the fact that when it's just two men, people tend to write it more... hardcore? Passionate? Rough? Generally Het writers tend to be gentler on women. Aside from that, with no woman in the fic it's easier to break off from yourself and just enjoy whatever is going on in the fic.

Anyways, as a lesbian myself, I honestly just read yaoi because I like it. I don't feel as though I need to be getting off on it or anything, but there's just something about it that I find appealing. Probably because there isn't a woman in there and so it seems less like there's someone that I'm supposed to relate to because I am a woman as well.

Regardless, I don't think there's anything wrong with someone not liking yaoi, regardless of their sexual orientation just like I'm sure you'll come to understand that there's nothing wrong with someone liking it regardless of their orientation.

I thank you very much for providing a clear answer. I never said I thought that it was wrong, though. It just confused me. Personally, I find it disappointing (and a little weird) that I can't ask a lesbian for good yuri recs. It also seems a bit ironic.

I like this comment because of how well put it is. But it is interesting because your reason of not having someone your supposed to relate to is one of the reasons I have no interest in m/m slash, and indeed less interest in gen fic and even shows and movies without women. I don't find identifying to be a problem in reading or enjoying stories. But I get it, different strokes for different folks, I just find the differences interesting.

Also, I wonder what fandoms your in, 'cause most of my het and f/f is just as passionate and rough as the few pieces of m/m I've read. I've found what is more often the case is that in het women will be ignored for descriptions of the men and that is the only time when the writers are "gentler." But most of my ships are usually not entirely based in fluffyness.

(Though I do kind of disagree with your last paragraph only because there is something that smacks me as a problem in our society if women don't want to relate to women. Like somehow we don't think of ourselves as being good enough. Which probably isn't even true and me being an anthropology student and over-analyzing. It just skeeves me out that there is such a discrepancy of yaoi versus yuri in fandom spaces like LJ where there are so many females.)

What sort of yuri are you looking for? Fanfic? Anime? Manga? Explicit or not?

Anime and manga, (preferably not explicit), but fic is good too. (I actually prefer shoujo ai to yuri; I'm mostly in it for the fluff.) I'm fine with smut in fic, though, but I can never seem to find any that's well written except in kink memes. And most of the kink memes I've been to are either dead or full of requests with no fills. >.>;

Re: OP

mizuno-youko.livejournal.com - 2010-03-24 00:32 (UTC) - Expand

Re: OP

wolfie.livejournal.com - 2010-03-24 03:02 (UTC) - Expand

Re: OP

(Anonymous) - 2010-03-27 12:06 (UTC) - Expand

Re: OP

wolfie.livejournal.com - 2010-03-27 17:46 (UTC) - Expand

For me, I think it's just I'm more into in-control and forceful women and shy, femme guys. Yaoi just happens to have the latter in abundance.

Simple: Your sexuality doesn't determine the porn/kinks/fetishes you have.

I think part of it is there isn't a word for female genitalia that doesn't induce giggles or cringes, whereas "cock" pretty much works for everything.

Personally, I sort of discovered my sexuality through reading fic, and the first fic I came across (and the only fic I knew existed, for a fairly long time!) was slash. It was through reading that slash that I realised "oh yeah, this whole same sex thing makes much more sense to me than opposite sex sex!", and though I can't really explain why that is (though at a guess, perhaps it was because I was reading at a time when I thought I "should" be straight, so because I was reading about males, that it was alright, and still a "straight thing to do"?), that feeling of it all clicking into place has stayed with me. And because of that, I still enjoy reading about same sex, male couples.

I see your confusion, because I do find boy-bits icky from a personal perspective - I don't want to be near them in my own sex life, thank you very much! - but I can totally get that the characters in the fic are really turned on by each other, cocks and all, and it's the turned-on-ness that works for me, rather than the genitals themselves.

Throwing out a guess here: It's easy to be unashamedly hot when writing exclusively about the opposite sex because you don't have the urge to reality check it against your own experiences. This isn't to say that yaoi writers want to write unrealistically, it's just that they don't have that party pooper inside that reminds them that they wouldn't enjoy it. Who knows, maybe the prostate gland does make anal feel a whole lot better.

Re: 146

asimaiyat.livejournal.com - 2010-03-24 14:41 (UTC) - Expand

Since a lot of characters in yaoi are pretty androgynous and are usually drawn without penises, try to think of it as butch-on-butch. That’s the only thing I can think of for why lesbians might like it.

Either that or they don’t want to seem hateful of men/gay men.

But then again, I'm a gay guy who likes het and yuri. So what should I know about other people's kinks?

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