[ SECRET POST #1799 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1799 ⌋


Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

IP logging is on because of the youtube redirects.

Secrets Left to Post: 06 pages, 144 secrets from Secret Submission Post #257.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeats ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

When I've heard people (guys, exclusively) say "I only prefer Asian women", they are also frequently quick to point out how delicate and doll-like Asian women are, or how much they love this sexy anime or that one.

Also, I know this is just my experience, but I've never heard anybody say "I'm only attracted to white people" and not be called out for racism.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm just curious, but have you ever heard a minority say they were only attracted to white people and then get accused of being racist? Usually when my friends say something like "white guys are my type," we all just cluck and sigh in exasperation. I mean, I can see why it's so problematic for another white person to say something like that... but it's not the same for minorities (and rightly so).

[(Anonymous)]

Yes, but the tongue-clucking disapproval is much more common.

[silverau.livejournal.com]

No, I've never seen that (though I won't claim it doesn't happen.) Most people I see just go "Oh." But I have some non-white friends whose say their families don't want them to date outside their race, which I guess is similar.

I've seen the reverse, though - I knew a black girl who got called racist for saying she didn't like white boys. But, that was in middle school, and I think most of the people who said that were teasing her and not actually offended.

[(Anonymous)]

So much this. It's like they don't even think of Asian women as human. That's what defines yellow fever to me. Chasing girls who can barely speak English, dating a girl based on her perceived submissiveness, and/or being massively predatory in other ways. (i.e. guys who move to Asia to 'teach English' and fuck their students). I'd call them disgusting as dogs, but that's an insult to dogs.

I don't see this behaviour from other racial preferences or interrelationships -- only white male / Asian female ones. Which makes me suspect even the honest loving ones, if there are any. Yellow fever is exactly what is says on the tin: an ugly disease.

[hopeandmemory.livejournal.com]

guys who move to Asia to 'teach English' and fuck their students

omg this is horrifying, as a woman who wants to go to s. korea to teach EFL. D: most of the dudes in EPIK seemed pretty cool, but now that you mention it, it wouldn't surprise me if there were some guys who did that. :/

[(Anonymous)]

most korean students come out of high school despising westerners because of the royal assholes who taught them english. it's not exclusively a male thing, either, although the men who go have a reputation for being skeevy. some of the more terrible female teachers have a reputation for being arrogant and condescending.

it's sad that a lot of young koreans these days are being exposed to such awful individuals, and drawing their conclusions on western culture around these limited interactions.

[(Anonymous)]

99% of Western guys in Asia are douchebags with yellow fever and American military slackjaws (with yellow fever). The only reason there hasn't been a race riot is because... well, guess who has the guns?

[relmneiko.livejournal.com]

some of the more terrible female teachers have a reputation for being arrogant and condescending.

...as an ESL tutor this makes me wince. I was told once by a fellow teacher (who was asian) that I'm condescending with students and I asked him in what way/give me examples but he couldn't give me anything specific. It's been driving me crazy since; I don't know what I'm doing that's condescending but I think I must be doing it. I want to fix my behaviour but I just have no fucking clue tbh.

ESL teachers get no damn feedback. Most people who do the "teach English in Asia" thing have no idea what the fuck they're doing/are seriously underqualified, really. I think a lot of it is unconscious/out of sheer ignorance. That doesn't make it okay, but we go in pretty blind... there's no one to school us and the fact that most people just go for a year or two and leave just as they're figuring shit out makes it worse. The way the entire thing is run is shitty and doesn't make for good teachers. A TESL certificate and a BA do not a teacher make.

IN summary: HALP.

[(Anonymous)]

well i was using the word condescending from a cultural viewpoint, like, a lot of my friends have told me that their teachers used to say things like "we do it like this where i'm from and you should do it like that too because it's far superior to your way of doing things", or "haha you guys are so cute, the way you do your silly little things", or "look at you trying to hard to speak english! you're so precious" as actual feedback when they wanted serious advice on how to improve their accents, and stuff.

as far as your own experience goes, your problem doesn't sound like an exclusively esl issue, more of a teaching issue. or maybe, on some level, it comes across as though you're purposely dumbing yourself down when you talk to your students because you don't think they can handle anything else. i've never taken esl, but i have plenty of friends who did, and that was usually their biggest problem-- they might not have had a full command of the english language, but they resented anyone who didn't give them to opportunity to at least try.

[ruadragon.livejournal.com]

If it helps, I taught English in China for a while, and none of the guys were like that. A lot of them did end up with Chinese girlfriends, but none of them were their students, and it seemed to be more of an availability thing.

[(Anonymous)]

Don't tell me you didn't consider this happening before. Do you think a lot of white guys are just 'interested in Korean culture' as they like to say? Really?

Half of the guys I know who went to Korea were horrific perverts who were probably in Korea to escape charges for sex crimes back home. There was a particularly repulsive pick-up artist from Montreal I knew who liked to brag about how many Korean girls' virginities he'd taken, but that's neither here nor there... The other half were fairly normal guys who hated the whole experience because of the previously mentioned perverts who soured it for them and made them all look bad.

These places ought to have background checks, I swear to god...

[(Anonymous)]

Ugh. This x1000.

I went to Japan a couple of years ago on an exchange student program, and about half the Western guys in my class were only there to pick up Japanese women. We went to Hiroshima, Osaka Castle, Tokyo Disney and all sorts of other tourist locations during our stay in Japan, yet instead of seeing the sights and learning about the culture/history of Japan, the guys spent the entire time chatting up Japanese girls and having sex with them, then bragging about how many girls they tricked into thinking they were special then ditching them after sex because the girls either couldn't understand English or didn't know their real names. Some of the guys even bragged about having unprotected sex with virgins, then joked that the girls would have to bring up babies on their own if they got pregnant. I hope that's not true, but I wouldn't be surprised if it is. So gross tbh.

[relmneiko.livejournal.com]

Holy fuck those guys sound like dickbags and remind me uncomfortably of some of the guys I knew while on exchange. So many goddamn white guys there to pick up Japanese girls. But I also heard the other side of it - Japanese girls who exclusively dated foreign guys so they could a) practice their English and b) have a casual relationship that was sure to be over within a year. I don't think Japanese girls are that naive; there's a lot of mutual use going on.

My spirits were lifted also but one really decent guy I knew who was in a long-term committed relationship with his Japanese girlfriend - they'd met in America, done the long-distance thing, and he went to Japan and studied Japanese for her. Totally sweet guy.

[silverau.livejournal.com]

That sounds a lot different from what those guys were doing, though. I mean, if they were lying to the guys and saying "I looove you I'll go back to your country with you and we can get married and live in a cute suburban house and have three kids and a dog and get old together! <3" but were secretly planning to dump the guy before he went home, that's pretty cruel. But casually dating to practice their English isn't that bad and can easily go both ways (the guy is probably practicing his Japanese, too, either with her or with whatever Japanese friends he makes there) and having a short relationship, provided both parties understand it's intended to be just that, is totally different from "trying to trick girls into thinking they're special and planning to dump them if they get pregnant."

[(Anonymous)]

Honestly I think Japan had the right idea in the 1600s when they boiled foreign interlopers alive...

[silverau.livejournal.com]

D: That's disgusting.