[ SECRET POST #1984 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1984 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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13.
[Little Shop of Horrors]


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14.
[Sherlock BBC]


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15. http://i.imgur.com/Jxlnf.png
[sort of porny and possible underage; photomanip, Snape/Hermione]

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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]












16. [SPOILER WARNING for Arrested Development]
[TRIGGER WARNING for incest]



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17. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape]



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18. [TRIGGER WARNING for abuse, suicide]



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19. [TRIGGER WARNING for sexual violence, rape, coercion, cult like mentalities, and violence]



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20. [TRIGGER WARNING for pedophilia]

[Let the Right One In/Låt den rätte komma in]


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21. [TRIGGER WARNING for body horror, gore]

[Parasyte]


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22. [TRIGGER WARNING for abuse]



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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #283.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

A stopped clock is right twice a day. My main problem with SJWs isn't that they are always, always wrong about everything, it's that their culture of shame and dogpiling and buzzwords and "intent doesn't matter" and cliquishness hurts their causes more than it helps. They've become a cancer in fandom.

And it really vastly underestimates the contribution of all those people who have been keeping fandom friendly all these years without the hobnail boots. To listen to the SJW crowd, fandom was /b/ before they came around to clean it up. No it really wasn't.

[(Anonymous)]

Few things piss me off more than "intent doesn't matter." Yes it fucking does. It's used as an excuse sometimes, yes, but sometimes... people genuinely did not mean any harm and don't even comprehend how what they said might be harmful. These are different situations, accept it.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not the poster you responded to, anon, but: OMG, yes. I see that "intent doesn't matter" crap going on all the time on Livejournal, unfortunately.

[insanenoodlyguy]

Intent is the only goddamn thing that matters on the internet at least.

Granted, if I get a little sleeply after a hard day at work, nod off in my car and hit and kill a child, and then I keep saying I didn't mean to do it?

Well, I'm right! I didn't mean it! I wasn't drinking or something that could make it more directly my fault! I'm responsible, absolutely, but I didn't mean it! And you know what? People are going to hate me anyway. Members of the child's family, for one, and friends, and so on. As horrible as that would be, I could understand it. Intent didn't matter there, there isn't a take-back or apology that makes it okay.

That and many other real life situations could apply. If I say something that inadvertently offended somebody on the internet? what I meant to say kinda matters there. It's not like I hit your kid, Jesus.

[fadeinthewash]

Even in the run-over-a-kid example, intent does still matter. It's why we have different laws designating first-degree murder, second-murder, manslaughter, and so forth. And as much as people might hate you for killing a kid through vehicular negligence, I bet you they'd find it in themselves to hate you even more if you were actually a child serial killer.

[insanenoodlyguy]

Granted, there are degrees. I don't think intent really stops mattering, and I didn't explain that well enough.

Rather however, I mean there are thing you can't take back, and can't expect forgiveness for. Where any and all attemps to fix it will never be adequate.

A piece of art or a comment with inappropriate language on tumblr? Those things will never be like that.

[(Anonymous)]

I can't even express how angry it makes me to hear people say that a friend calling me "bitch" in a joking manner to express solidarity with me is the same as someone who obviously hates my guts shouting "bitch" at me as a way to scare the shit out of me. Only the most tone deaf person can't tell the difference between a word said in hate and a word said in friendship.

[stainless]

I agree so much.

I do think it's possible sometimes to look at something specific and concrete and say: "You did [this.] [That] resulted. The result was hurtful, as shown by [that] unintended consequence." Which is "intent doesn't matter" in a sense. If I'm playing with a loaded gun, it goes off, and you lose a foot, well, it's not going to grow your foot back that I didn't mean it.

But talking about social trends and attitudes is not cut and dried in the way "Fuck, now my foot's bleeding, you asshole" is.

And even in something cut and dried like the foot bleeding scenario, you could blame me for shooting you... but you couldn't claim I aimed (assuming there was evidence I didn't.)

[elialshadowpine]

Mmm. I kinda agree and kinda don't.

I think that intent doesn't matter in as far as the other person's reactions. You might not intend to offend someone, but that doesn't change the fact that you did. And I think this is true in all areas of life, not just SJ. I have seen way too many times where someone said "Oh, I didn't mean it that way" and expected that to be all. It doesn't work that way.

That said, I do think that intent should be taken in context. Somebody saying they didn't intend it to be taken that way, and asking for clarification, and apologizing? Yeah, I generally think people should be more lenient because hello, the vast majority of people do not grow up knowing these things. *sigh*

[barnabys_bane]

This is kind of how I feel about it. Some of the most racist things I've had said to me were said with supposedly good intentions behind them, but it doesn't change the fact that I was offended. However, intent matters to me because it often determines the reaction of the other person when I let them know I was offended and explain why if necessary (provided I too am calm and rational about it, of course). When there was no true intent to hurt, there is an apology, I let whatever it was go, and we move on with our lives. No problem. When there was intent, I've found that people get defensive about what they said and/or they get even more blatantly offensive, and that's where trouble starts.

[elialshadowpine]

Yup. I try to approach it the same way, and the response thereafter really is telling.

[(Anonymous)]

I think that intent doesn't matter in as far as the other person's reactions. You might not intend to offend someone, but that doesn't change the fact that you did.

But that's just the thing. If I know someone was intending on offending me, my reaction is very different from what it is if they just didn't realize what they were saying might be offensive to me. I can't imagine someone treating the two scenarios the same way and being equally offended and hurt by both -- one is premeditated the other is accidental, and I have no doubt at all that the first person is far more dangerous and more of a threat (and more of an asshole) than the second.

[elialshadowpine]

If only that were the case! No, unfortunately, I have seen far, far too many situations where people regularly did treat them exactly the same. :(

[(Anonymous)]

+1

Someone (I forget who/where) in another discussion about this pointed out that this phrase was originally "intent isn't magic," and that is so so so much better to me. If you say something super hurtful, the fact that you didn't mean it to be hurtful doesn't make it all magically better, and you should probably listen and learn instead of getting super defensive and shutting down, at least if you want to avoid hurting people in the future.

But that is WAY different than "if you've said something offensive YOU ARE TERRIBLE no matter what your intent or if you even knew it was in any way offensive."

[veronica_rich]

This. There's a real culture of "never forgive, never forget" on the Internet.

[fuchsiascreams]

omg, yes. Completely agree with this. Not every situation warrants the same explosive response. If someone legitimately didn't know what they were saying or doing was wrong or hurtful, feels genuinely bad and apologizes, then move on. It's NOT appropriate to respond by

*Insulting them;
*Calling them stupid, ignorant assholes and then refusing to tell them what they did wrong;
*Further insulting them when they have the AUDACITY to ask that you explain to them why you're insulting them;
*Ask them to apologize and when they do, go on to tell them how their apology was fake, not good enough, passive-aggressive, or that it didn't matter anyway because "YOU'VE HURT PEOPLE AND YOU CAN'T EVER UNDO THAT, SO DON'T EVEN BOTHER TRYING TO APOLOGIZE, YOU'RE JUST AN ASSHOLE IF YOU DO AND IT SHOWS ME THAT YOU HAVEN'T LEARNED ANYTHING";
*Stalk, harass, bully, malign, shame, and dogpile them for weeks, months or years through different communities, websites, and their personal own journals;
*Go through their journals/other community posts, find things that you know bothers/hurts/triggers them, and promptly use that information to upset them.

[insanenoodlyguy]

/b/ is preferable. I'd rather everybody be a dick then anybody be afraid of harassment for speaking their mind.

[(Anonymous)]

This so much. Thank you.

[fuchsiascreams]

Pretty much this.