[ SECRET POST #1998 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1998 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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09.
[Peter Gabriel]


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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]












10. [SPOILERS for the Hunger Games]



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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]













11. [WARNING for abuse]



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12. [WARNING for rape]

[Hetalia]


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13. [WARNING for abuse]



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14. [WARNING for gore, animal abuse]
http://i.imgur.com/SjfD3.jpg
[images of actual dead animals and stuff.]



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15. [WARNING for rape]

[Video Games Awesome Live]


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16. [WARNING for abuse]

[Avatar: the Last Airbender]


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17. [WARNING for rape]

[American Horror Story]


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18. [WARNING for dub-con, grooming, brainwashing]



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19. [WARNING FOR general discussion of triggery topics (there's bound to be triggering material in the comments)]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #285.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 (warning for rape) - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 2 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fanaberia]

Women dominating their male partners is seen as odd. It's "commonly accepted" (just look at some articles about "women's fantasies") that all women want to be secretly dominated. Men being willingly submissive are seen as emasculated and not hot and worty of general female attention. Just my general media observation. My friends in RL are of similar mind I'm afraid.

[elaminator]

Women dominating their male partners is seen as odd.

I don't understand that. I guess when you mention it, it does seem like the general media tend to put most women into a 'need to be dominated' mindset, but...that just doesn't ring true to me, because people are too different to generalize them like that. (Don't doubt people do it, mind you, just don't get WHY they do.)

And I never realized dommes were seen as odd or that there weren't more of them. Then again I've never had experience in such things so I always assumed there were more people into it than I ever would know of, and that there were plenty of people of all types no matter the gender.

[fanaberia]

Yeah, media grew on a sexist society and thus that's what you get in mainstream productions. If there are dominative women then they are portayed as "dangerous", "deviant", "broken", "mysterious" or "toxic". The most recent example is Irene Adler in "Sherlock", but you can sure find similar characterisations in any procedural crime show. Same with actual people, when you look at sex business websites you see female domination presented as a novelty and a selling point while male domination is something natural and not "interesting".

[elaminator]

If there are dominative women then they are portayed as "dangerous", "deviant", "broken", "mysterious" or "toxic"

Hmm, you're right about that. I've never sat down and thought about it much, but it's true. The few that I can think of off the top of my head are the criminal type, and most of those words are befitting of them. Bah. The media gets a lot of things wrong, so it's not surprising they would drop the ball on this one as well.

[teh_sandwich]

Men being willingly submissive are seen as emasculated and not hot and worty of general female attention.

I really wish this stereotype didn't exist because 1)I think it takes a lot of courage for men to admit they want to be dommed. (Especially wanting to be dommed by women) But no, men must be masculine and in control at all times!!!

and 2) both my boyfriend and I find it incredibly hot when I domme the shit out of him (especially since he's twice my size!) :P

[fanaberia]

Culture demands for men to be undomable, but yes we'd all be lots happier when sexual/gender stereotypes disappeared :D . More nice sex = happier society!

[teh_sandwich]

I completely agree! Men and women would be much happier if everyone didn't care who tops.

I feel like there needs to be more top!women in fic too, but idk if it's just the fandoms I'm in but those fics seem pretty rare.

[fanaberia]

*Looks at your fandoms*
Only familiar with few, but Supernatural is the worst offender in ignoring dominant women EVAR! And Season3!Ruby/Sam ... damn, need to look for fic.

[teh_sandwich]

I know! Which sucks because there could be some really hot dom!female/male ships in that fandom. Like Season 3!Ruby/Sam, Lilith/any man ever, Meg/Cas, Jo/Dean...

[fanaberia]

:D I like your choices, I'll just throw in Bela/Dean. I bet they are somewhere buried deep inside...

[teh_sandwich]

Thank you. :D I knew I forgot an awesome lady somewhere! Bela was one of those characters I loved to hate. XD

[elialshadowpine]

Yeah. My now-ex was all on this shit about how he was "passively dominant" but if you told him to do something he was all like, "Yes, ma'am!" and really seemed to get an inordinate amount of pleasure about being told what to do. But when we were talking about kink and I mentioned he came across more submissive than dominant, he freaked out. Because, OMG, MEN MUST BE DOMINANT.

(He got over that and realized he's much happier being a sub. :P)

[teh_sandwich]

I'm glad he eventually came around, but that must've been just a little bit annoying. It's ok (not to mention hot!) for men to be subs!

I feel fortunate that my boyfriend has told me many times he genuinely LOVES being a sub. He doesn't give a shit if people see him as ~manly~ or not.

[fanaberia]

Good for your ex ;). Hm, maybe there are more "passively dominant" men out there covering themselves with labels?

[diet_poison]

blargh that assumption that men who do anything SLIGHTLY UN-MASCULINE ACCORDING TO SOCIETY are AUTOMATICALLY GAY

it makes me so mad.

The notion that a man who likes it in the ass must be gay is simply ignorant. But also annoying.

[fanaberia]

Duh, pegging is some obvious code word for gay ... that I've never heard. Ugh, pegging is extreme for manly men, try suggesting anything with arse and watch the reactions.

[tabaqui]

That just makes me rage. Way to make men even *more* defensive and knee-jerky in their reactions and actions. Bleh.

[philstar22]

This so much. There is a perception that a common male fantasy is being seduced by a woman with her initiating. But he always ends up being in control in that particular scenario. Full-on woman in charge and man as submissive is not commonly accepted at all.

[(Anonymous)]

This. Don't even get me started on guys from fetlife.

[philstar22]

Seriously. I finally had to leave that site. I joined only to gain knowledge on the dominant side of things because it is so hard to find stuff out there. But the number of creepy guys messaging me actually scared me. And they seem to be missing the point of D/s if they are trying to initiate and control the situation as the submissive.