[ SECRET POST #2012 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2012 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.


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03.


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04.
[Infinity Blade II, Chaos Ring]


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05.
[Kushiel's Legacy, Avengers, Harry Potter, Star Trek]


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06.
[America's next top Model]


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07.
[Common Law]


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08.
[MST3K ("Space Mutiny") and Final Fantasy VI]


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09.
[the bachelorette]


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10.
[Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon]


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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]













11. [SPOILERS for Deus Ex: Human Revolution]



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12. [SPOILERS for Legend of Korra]



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13. [SPOILERS for Legend of Korra]



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14. [SPOILERS for Pandora Hearts]



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15. [SPOILERS for Merlin]



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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]














16. [WARNING for suicide]

[Park Yong Ha]


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17. [WARNING for abuse]



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18. [WARNING for abuse]



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19. [WARNING for rape]



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20. [WARNING for incest]



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21. [WARNING for incest possibly (OP's request)]



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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #287.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

03. http://i.imgur.com/AZSYd.png

[(Anonymous)]

Ooh yeah I know what that's like to not be able to/want to do the things you did when you were depressed. Don't sweat it, anon, if you enjoyed it at one time you'll probably be able to enjoy it again. It might take a while, but just try to enjoy your health for now. The creativity will come in time.

[(Anonymous)]

OP, I don't want to diagnose you or anything, but as a person who has been in and out of depression and medication and all that, I'd bring this issue up with your doctor/psychiatrist. Because not being able to be motivated and take an interest in things you enjoy is a sign of depression, and it's possible that with drug therapy you may have treated some aspects of your depression, but you're now experiencing symptoms. Obviously you don't want to go back to a state where your life is at risk, but I think this is worth talking to your doctor about. My therapist is very supportive of my fandom activities and me using creativity to work out my issues rather than treating them with alcohol and drugs, and whoever is treating you may be too. I hope you get your creativity back soon, that lack of motivation for things you love is definitely not a fun place to live.

[(Anonymous)]

You know... a warning on that would have been nice.

[(Anonymous)]

How would it have been warned for? Warning for depression requires using the word depression, which is all the secret really does: say "depressed" a few times. There's nothing that goes into detail.

[(Anonymous)]

Jesus. A warning for reality? How dare you imply that a person's psychological state needs a warning. Grow up.

[illiadandoddity]

From what I understand from my experience and my friends on antidepressants, that frequently happens for a while after you first go on the medication. Your brain is readjusting to this new chemistry, and creativity suffers because of it. But have no fear! Every single one of them got their creativity and enthusiasm back - you just have to wait a little while.

Just relax and live your life. It's summer (unless you're Australian), so hit the pool. Get some errands done. Give your brain and body some time to adjust to the rhythm of a non-depressed life, and I guarantee your inspiration and drive will come back.

[(Anonymous)]

From personal experience, I think it's possible that your lack of creativity, etc. is a medication side-effect. Wanting to have a creative part to your life is NOT a screwed-up priority, and medication shouldn't take that away from you, so you might want to consider asking your doctor to help you find something that will make you feel better without anesthetizing your creativity.

[(Anonymous)]

This actually worries me quite a bit in general. Not for me, or even anyone I know, but for the state of art in general: great artists and novelists have often shown all the symptoms for depression, and it makes me sad to imagine what medication would have erased. Or what it's preventing. :/

/my priorities suck as well

[(Anonymous)]

Depression does lead many to art, but I assure you that plenty of not-depressed/other-negative-states-of-mind people totally do awesome art.

Consider that medication has probably helped many artists to not kill themselves, and probably helped careers be longer than they would otherwise have been by virtue of helping the artists to stop dying.

[castorochiaro]

Honestly? I've felt I can create MORE with my depression under control. When I was so down on myself, I just couldn't create because nothing I did was good enough. Now I have the energy and the motivation to start drawing again.

[(Anonymous)]

When I'm badly depressed enough, I will destroy things I have created, because I find that I hate them and think they're not good enough. I also can't create anything new, because again, I think they're awful.

So instead of thinking of meds destroying art, think of all the stuff that wouldn't be created/wouldn't exist if it weren't for them.

[cloud_riven]

I hope you get your drive back :(
My spells suck my productivity and ability to enjoy what I'm doing, but I would hate it just as much if I couldn't during my upswing.

[elaminator]

I think it's great you're getting your depression under control OP, and hope this is just a passing phase caused by the medication. Give it time, and I'm sure you'll be better than ever.

[kallanda_lee]

Sadly, I understand you anon. I was the most creative at the most miserable times in my life. And strangely, I also felt the most alive when I was closest to killing myself. With time, I got some of my creativity back...but, it's different. There's a sport that I've lost.

But the thing you have to ask yourself, if it's really worth your sanity.

[(Anonymous)]

Not sure why you think your priorities are mess up, OP. Being able to do things you enjoy is kind of important. It's clear you need to look into changing medications.

[(Anonymous)]

Like many other people here have said it's probably an effect of your antidepressants and not an effect of you not being depressed.
For me, it took around 3 months in on my antidepressants to start having any thoughts that were even remotely interesting to me- I still feel like my mind had been dulled, but not as much as before. However, keep in mind that this is all variable from person to person.
Also OP, I wish you all the luck with fighting your depression!

[(Anonymous)]

Sorry, just to add, I feel like I worded myself poorly and made antidepressants sound like they suck the life out of you.
What I meant to say was that I think you should stick to your medication if it's working and to keep in mind that how you first respond to your medication is not how you will respond indefinitely.

[(Anonymous)]

See I feel like the exact opposite. I used to love to draw and do fan art but over the past year I've been battling with depression and I've lost all inspiration and interest to do any art at all :(

[shinsengumi]

I think it's important to keep in mind that only depression—and the possible tragic results thereof—can take away those drives permanently. You always have the chance to recover them while you're well.

[(Anonymous)]

Hey there. :)
I was in a similar boat to you, OP.
After I recovered from depression I found it incredibly difficult to get back into writing.
I think maybe it was because I had been used to thinking in a depressed way and writing in that state, and I had to adjust my thinking and adjust to writing WITHOUT depression.
I am slowly starting to write again. It's hard, but it is so worth it. One thing I've found that helps (maybe it'll work for you?) is to just DO something. Put words on paper (or draw, whatever's your style). It can be anything, you can ramble on about nothing, as long as you're doing something.
You can get through it, OP, I know you can!

[(Anonymous)]

For writing, a good goal is 500 words. It doesn't matter what you write; it can be your shopping list, or what your day was like, a silly story, your dream crackfic, anything! It doesn't matter if it's not well-edited.

For drawing/painting, one simple sketch each time is awesome. Even if it's nonsensical scribbles while you are doing other things can help you unwind. I've found myself doing nonsense in paper and the little by little the abstract lines turn into figures.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh wow. Me too, anon. Meds--they take a lot away along with the bad.

[childings.livejournal.com]

You're probably still depressed if you lost interest in things that important to you. But you might not realize it because you don't feel the melancholy aspect of it anymore. I just got over a depression like that, where I thought I was okay emotionally because I didn't really feel sad (or happy actually), just kind of "ok", but at the same time I wasn't drawing anything which is insane for me because I've been drawing crap since I was old enough to pick up a pencil.

In short, you don't really get over depression, you just learn how to manage it so it doesn't become a problem, like other mental illnesses. If you have the ability to see a doctor or other professional I would and I would definitely bring up your inability to be creative, because it seems like you are still having difficulty managing your depression