[ SECRET POST #2059 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2059 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 045 secrets from Secret Submission Post #294.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

02. http://i.imgur.com/PQtU0.jpg

[kallanda_lee]

Are you perhaps being so harsh because you're not a native speaker yourself, and you feel that if you can do it everyone should be able to?

Thing is, it doesn't work that way. English comes easier to people who speak, say, Dutch, than it does to someone who speaks Japanese.

Also different people will have varying ability to master a new language.

We're all in fandom to have fun - stop being so harsh, both on yourself and others. Stop being bitchy, if you know that that's what you are.

[(Anonymous)]

English comes easiest to people who practise it. End of story.

[(Anonymous)]

Well, uh, I'm pretty sure that's not uncommon.

To your merit, you recognize the hypocrisy and keep it to yourself instead of airing it and getting someone hurt, so good for you!

If it bothers you so much, try to do some introspection to figure out why you are taking your insecurities on others, and try to rectify it.

[cloud_riven]

^What they said. all of that ♥

Even if it has nothing to do with insecurities, I still think it's worth noting that you recognize the doucheness. Can't exactly control your inner thought process though, so at least you have tact.

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, anon, you're offensive and arrogant. Unless your writing is perfect, you have no right to feel elite. Hence the reason why I've never been elitist about anything. However, based on the S!B section, I think you're brain is doing some psychological trickery. Chortling over flaws in the writing of others is probably easier than acknowledging that you sometimes feel inadequate.

[(Anonymous)]

is it because you feel insecure about your own skills that you're so judgemental of others? you might be using it to feel better about yourself.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh wow there's some issues all up in here. Better call Dr. Phil, OP.

[(Anonymous)]

So you're not just a jerk and a hypocrite, you're two-faced as well. Nice.

[logicbutton]

Okay, so your insecurities about what other people must think of non-native speakers are almost certainly the source of bitchy!you, and you probably know it. It might help to remind yourself, when you're feeling that way, that many (most?) English-speaking people take non-native speakers on a case-by-case basis and don't just paint you all with the same brush automatically, and that many of us know what it's like to try speaking another language and that we don't do it as well as you.

[(Anonymous)]

You are a fool.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm going to skip over your holier-than-thou attitude about other non-native speakers and get straight to the point about your beta deleting parts of your story you liked.

When it comes to writing, sometimes you have to kill your darlings. I write original fiction, in the have-been-paid-for-it way, and one thing I've learned is that you can write something that's creative and original and gorgeous and smart--and doesn't advance the story at all. And when that happens, it needs to go. No matter how much you like it, if it doesn't advance the story, it's dead weight and you need to get rid of it. That's what it means to kill your darlings. It hurts and it sucks, but it will improve your story. Consider it practice to becoming a better writer.

[visp]

Well, so long as you are a snob about all shitty writing, not just non-native speakers, I'd say it's ok.

I mean, where would we all be without the ability to talk shit about Shades of Grey?

[dazzledfirestar]

Obviously everyone's said most of what can be said about your shitty attitude and how maybe you should do some self-examination about it. Btw, I'm a non-native speaker too and I did just fine because I learned English early on. There are factors you don't know for everyone that has or is learning this language.

That being said... is your beta talking to you while cutting chunks out of your story or just doing it willy nilly because... WOW! Not cool. Make a note, say "Hey, this really drags things down" or "this really interrupts the flow, maybe you should cut it" but to flat out delete? That's cold.

[blueonblue]

I think that if you can be kinder to yourself, you'll find it easier to be kinder to other writers.

Fandom is supposed to be fun. If your beta deletes something you love, you can put it back in. If later on you decide your beta was right, there's always an edit button.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not overly fond of your run-on sentences, and the wording seems a bit awkward as well. Are you German, by any chance?

[(Anonymous)]

Honestly, if you're keeping your comments strictly detached from their fics -- either offline-only or scoured of any identifying details -- and leaving positive feedback, you are being much nicer than many, many, MANY people, and I'd let the hypocrisy slide.

[(Anonymous)]

You sound bipolar.

And completely insufferable.

[(Anonymous)]

Seems to me that this is a pretty clear-cut case of insecurity manifesting as arrogance.

You feel yourself to be inadequate. So, you seek out individuals who are performing more poorly than yourself in order to make yourself feel better. And, well, you can't make yourself feel better without denigrating the poor performers.

Next time you find someone whose grasp of the language is not as good as yours, try to stop yourself from making fun. Instead, start thinking, "this shows that the mistakes I make are normal for a non-native speaker." Maybe you can reprogram the way you handle your own feelings of inadequacy. And maybe you can turn the source of your arrogance into a reason to feel a sense of community.

[(Anonymous)]

Two things I find interesting:

- you're a non-native speaker who make fun of other non-native speakers because you feel ashamed of them
- you cry over harsh criticism, yet then deliver "bitchy" critcism to other writers

It's as though you're attacking all the bits of yourself you don't like when you see them in other people. That's really sad, OP. :(
The good news is you're at aware of this, and are uncomfortable enough with yourself to make an anonymous secret about it.
Maybe you need to start accepting those parts of yourself, OP.

There will always be parts of your writing that aren't good. Even the greatest of writers have things they're bad at, because no one is perfect.
And there's nothing wrong with being a non-native speaker. In fact, belonging to another culture means you have a unique perspective on that that native English speakers don't. That's such a wonderful writing opportunity.

[(Anonymous)]

I feel horrible for this, but after I finished reading this all I could see were the mistakes in the English...

[velvet_mace]

There's all kinds of wrong going on here.

First of all your beta -- what. the. fuck. No. She doesn't get to delete paragraphs that you loved. You are the writer, she is merely an advisor. She can tell you that something sounds awkward. Or you used a word wrong. Or that she disagrees with your characterization or doesn't like a plot point. But you can take her advice or not, but she does not get veto power over your words.

Now you'd do well to seriously consider what she has to say, but ultimately, your writing needs to please and pleasure you, not her. Remember, your beta is just a person, she's not better than you, she's just another set of eyes, and you aren't going to agree on everything, especially when it comes to matters of taste.

And you are passing the judgmental abuse on to others. I almost don't blame you if this is what you think is a normal writing environment.

As great as it is to improve and become a better writer, it has to be a balance. Fandom's biggest expectation is that you be entertaining in your writing, not perfect.

[netbug009]

Sadly, I'm not half as concerned about you making fun of people in secret as I am you giving them nothing but positive feedback anyway.

Laughing to yourself is your business. Lying to others when they may appreciate polite, constructive criticism, especially people trying to learn a new language, is extremely rude.

[(Anonymous)]

a) You don't leave people asshole comments with the intent of making them feel bad, you leave them nice comments. So that's good.
b) If you enjoy mocking their fics or writing secretly, who is it hurting? They don't know. If you have fun with it, keep doing it. Who cares. If you feel bad enough about it that you want to stop doing it, then take actual steps to modify your behavior. But it seems like you're just stressing to give yourself something to stress about. What's the point of that?
c) If your beta makes you feel so shitty all the time, maybe you need a new beta, or need to explain your feelings to your beta and come up with a process that doesn't leave you crying all the time.
d) If you're crying all the time because of getting fics betad, you might want to look into therapy for depression.

[(Anonymous)]

You're a wretch. Pulling other people down does not lift you above them.