[ SECRET POST #2079 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2079 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 057 secrets from Secret Submission Post #297.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

She hasn't shown up for work in a while. Management was confused and they think she's left the country. All I could think was

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ma6qeqO5P91r3c0rao2_1280.jpg

Now I wonder what that 40k debt was for.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[mekkio]

What happened? I must have missed the thread.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

Idr exactly when I posted before, I'll try to find the threads.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

I'd remembered it was about 2 weeks, that was easier than I expected.

http://fandomsecrets.dreamwidth.org/663308.html?thread=577507340#cmt577507340
http://fandomsecrets.dreamwidth.org/664052.html?thread=577672948#cmt577672948

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[mekkio]

Oh, now I remember that.

All I have to say is that someone must have major gambling debts. And the mob wants their money.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

Well...yikes. At least the boyfriend didn't have to get forcibly involved in whatever it was.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

That dude dodged a serious bullet

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[gobbledigook]

Holy shit. At least she can't step on your nuts now, huh OP?
It sounds like you did her fiancee a pretty good favor.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[insanenoodlyguy]

Well, at least none of what happens is your fault. Despite some of the cowards on here, you did what you had to do, and you can live with yourself no matter how this ends.

You'll probably never know the whole story, but you were a side character, not the protagonist.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

I still think this was none of your business and you just didn't like the lady and wanted to feel morally superior and self righteous so went and ruined a ladies life. Go you! You scared her out of possibly a happy relationship where the dude seemed okay with the idea and even made her leave her job which could have possibly helped her pay off all of that debt! You should feel great!

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

I never said anything to her except the first conversation where I told her she should tell him before they get married. Whatever happened to make her leave must have happened between the fiance and her, which I wasn't privy to.

If he were totes okay with the idea, I doubt she'd have left. He was willing to talk to her about it, but that doesn't mean he liked what he heard?

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

You said before that he was not happy but okay with it and willing to work/talk with her. I imagine she knows you talked with him. Not exactly a giant leap in logic to put the two incidents together. And yeah, even if he were totes okay with the idea the fact that strangers were talking about her debt and talking to her fiancee about her debt and then an unplanned confrontation - that all could have spooked her. Not saying the lady is a saint or did nothing wrong, I just don't think it was your place to interfere and I hate how everyone on this thread is jumping to conclusions about how awesome you are and how obviously evil this lady is.

That being said, I could be taking this too personally since I have massive debt (around 100k) and am really sensitive about the topic. A lot of shame and embarrassment connect with large debt.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

nayrt

But it is pretty skeevy to marry someone and know that you have serious debt problems and not tell them about it. Just fucking be honest. I would be pissed as hell if my SO waited until after we were married to let me know about their debt. Far, far more upset than I would have been if they let me know earlier in the relationship. If you lie about that shit, what else would you lie about? Not a great way to start a marriage is what I'm trying to say.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

I would never lie about that, but at the same time I don't think I'd ever be all that upset? I can't know for sure how I'd react to a situation until I'm in it but I honestly don't think I'd be too upset if someone I loved and planned to spend the rest of my life with confessed to being in debt. Not like they confessed to being a pedophile or a rapist or something.

Yes, the lady should have been up front. But I don't think it was OPs job to spill the beans. And it seems like OP is taking way too much glee out of this lady's poor predicament just because she personally didn't like her.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

Do they plan to take care of the debt themselves though? This girl obviously wasn't since she had got the guy to pay for her debt before. I get not caring if the other person's like "yeah I have debt but I'm gonna pay it off" but if they hide it from you then tell you later after you gave them money for the debt they said was smaller the first time uh. Warning bells.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[fingalsanteater]

If the woman was keeping this a secret from her potential spouse, someone needed to let him know. Depending on where the couple lived and what kind of debt it was, the non-liable spouse could be held liable if the debt ended up in collections. It is never a good idea to keep debt secret because you could ruin your spouse's credit and finances as well.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

It's not a big deal for you, anon. For some people, this is a huge issue. When you're married in some countries, you are responsible for your spouse's debt. 40k is a huge amount of money.

I would file for divorce if this happened to me. :x

This is a basic violation of trust.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

He sounded okay with the idea of the debt and said she likely had reasons for not telling him. He said he wouldn't mind talking about it with her. But I wasn't privy to that conversation and I don't know what went down. It's possible that a whole bunch of things made him wary, like where the debt came from- she never did say where. What if it was something shady?

And remember he literally did not have the means to help her pay it off? And he was looking for a way to tell her so? It's possible she left of her own volition for that reason as well.

I wasn't the only one she'd told, either. That was clear enough in the really proud and casual way she told me the first time in the office kitchen where other people were sitting right there.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

That being said, I could be taking this too personally since I have massive debt (around 100k) and am really sensitive about the topic. A lot of shame and embarrassment connect with large debt

I don't anyone here is saying that having a large amount of debt makes you a bad person or anything. It's a pretty common problem. Just don't wait until you're married to someone to bring it up with them. It's not hard. Anyone can do that.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

IA. I think the anon with the debt and my coworker had really, really different feelings about debt. Anon doesn't sound like she would brag to coworkers about how she got her fiance to pay off the first 10k and was hanging on for the rest, which this lady was doing. :/

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

lolwut

man if my fiance had 40K in debt and had no plans of telling me until after we were hitched, I'd want to know about it before I married the loser. Just sayin'. unless you're the kind of person who would conceal massive debt from your partner until you married them, then I would think you'd agree...

*points and laughs*

[insanenoodlyguy]

I'm calling this now. This isn't just about debt. You did some stupid suit a while back. And somebody blabbed on you. And the relationship ended.

You feel for this guy cause like you, all of this was an overreaction, right?

Nope. You really were that shitty fucko. And now it's all dredged up again.

Haw haw!

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[(Anonymous)]

What on earth are you on about? If my soon-to-be spouse was massively in debt and didn't think that it was worth telling me, I'd want someone to let me know, so that it wouldn't come as a surprise after we were married. It isn't exactly a great start for a life together, if the other party feels like not mentioning something this important.

Re: Fiancee with the 40k debt anon

[brightblueink]

This is probably a little cruel of me but I find this entire thread VERY entertaining. The drama just keeps continuing.