fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2120 ]

[ SECRET POST #2120 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2120 ⌋

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...not sure if I want you to elaborate on that or not.

I'm 16, and my boyfriend is 18. We live in California. :(

Sorry.

Yeah, it's ridiculous... some people have been placed on the registered sex offenders list for the rest of their lives because of this, and there's nothing to distinguish them from REAL sex offenders. Like, being a couple of months different in age could ruin a life. It's messed up.

I kind of side eye this every time I see it. So, you don't want to be put on a sex offender list because of a couple months of age difference. The solution? DON'T FUCKING HAVE SEX UNTIL YOU'RE BOTH OF AGE.

FFS. Sex is not a crucial part of life. If it is illegal to have sex with the person you want to have sex with, and you know damn well it will only be for a few months/years more...I have no sympathy for you.

You're kidding, right? Sex IS a pretty damn crucial part of life. It's our instinct, our nature. Just because there's a dumbass law that a few crazy people will enforce doesn't mean you should shut down your sex life.

The law is there for a reason but it's so general that it should be refined. And in the case of someone having sex with a consenting partner a few months younger than them, they should NOT be placed on a sex offenders list for the rest of their life. Jaywalking may be illegal for a reason but it would be fucking nuts to get locked up for life for it, wouldn't it?

I won't argue with you that the law should be refined, but unfortunately right now, as the law stands, the two of you gettin' funky is illegal. All relationships require a certain degree of compromise, concessions, sacrifice, etc. and I guess you've discovered what your's is. At least it's a temporary one, you won't have to wait long before you're old enough.

Alternatively, you could just, you know, have sex and not get caught. It's really not hard. And if you do get caught, the chances of him being prosecuted are still very slim. Because who fucking cares? Not most people, that's who.

So yeah, either suck it up for a year or two or get busy and keep your mouth shut about it. Those are not bad choices, so there's really no sense in whining about it.

I'm not that anon who posted the thread, so I'm not wah-wah-ing about my own situation here. I'm way past the legality issue, and I'm still capable of seeing that it's an unfair situation.

I think it's stupid to take the stance of "stop whining about it" when it's a stupidly written law with a ridiculous outcome for some people who get caught. There are some places that overlook the case of two teens close together in age, and that's the route everywhere should go.

It's not just whining. Some people get massively fucked over for the rest of their lives because of this. But it's nice to know it's such a pointless issue to people like you and that those people should stop complaining.

"have sex and not get caught"

That might not be so easy if she gets pregnant, in the case the preventative measures she uses fail.

OP, Is it legal for you to buy birth control pills at your age? Would they sell Plan B to a sixteen year old in California? Would you be willing and able to have an abortion? That's something you should think about before having sex with your bf. Just don't take the situation lightly!

Safer option: Playing around in secret, but no parts touching each other.

Remember, you won't be sixteen forever. You will be able to make decisions for yourself one day!

Sex IS a pretty damn crucial part of life

You won't die without it. A lot of people don't even want it. To me, that means not fucking crucial.

I don't give a shit who you bang, anon, but don't act like it's a great injustice that you aren't allowed to swap fluids and get STDs like the rest of us until you're both legal adults.

A lot of people don't even want it.

Aces =/= a lot of people js.

Asexuals are only part of that though? You can not want sex for more reasons than being asexual...

And yet sex is still the way to propagate our species... so yeah, it IS crucial to life. JFS just cause some people don't want it (which is fine) doesn't mean it's not important whatsoever.

I don't think the human race is going to die out just because immature teenagers in the United States can't reproduce.

I'm not the anon who posted the thread, I'm 23 and I think the laws are stupid as shit. It IS an injustice if someone gets fucked over royally the rest of their lives for something so stupid. Stop trivializing that.

So you're a minor and your boyfriend is a legal adult. Them's the breaks. You both should try dating people your own age.

Exactly. Plus, in terms of your average 16 year old and your average 18 year old...that's a big difference in terms of outlook/maturity/societal expectations. What is a high school senior doing dating a high school freshman/sophomore anyway?

NA

Um, I graduated high school at 17 because I have a summer birthday, but there were plenty of people in my year who were 18, and at least one who was 19. So there's not necessarily a big difference, especially if you met as equals in some non-school context (club, camp, job, whatever). I think statutory rape laws have their place, but seriously, I don't think "date someone your own age" is a reasonable thing to say when the difference is two years.

OP

Exactly. I actually met my bf in a school-context since we're taking the same math and science classes. I've even tutored him a bit.

OP

Um, I'm a junior. Also, he just turned eighteen, so the age difference isn't even two years.

Yeah, nope. Still don't care. If the age difference is less than two years, you can suck it up. Or--as so many people helpfully suggested--have sex and don't get caught. Not that difficult.

It's not that hard to have sex in secret and not have people find out. If you just want to wave your hands around and dance through the streets with condoms in your hair declaring "I have sex with my eighteen year old boyfriend and I'm sixteen. Woooo" then you're going to have to wait until you're eighteen. You'll live.

Right, because people are entirely interchangeable, so OP should just swap out her boyfriend for a more acceptable model. People totally work that way.

If you want to, just have sex, be safe, and don't let anyone find out you did/are doing it. And if someone accuses you of doing it, DENY DENY DENY.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2120 ]

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