[ SECRET POST #2137 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2137 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 015 secrets from Secret Submission Post #305.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

"I'm glad that makes them feel better" sounds really patronizing. I'm not a part of FA, but I know enough about it to know that it's not about making themselves feel better about being fat. It's about trying to get doctos to take them seriously and not just say their problem comes from being fat. It's about not getting jobs they're qualified for because they're fat. It's about being able to walk in a store without a stranger commenting on the contents of their shopping cart. There's a problem in the world with thin people acting like it's their business to "save" fat people from being fat when it's not actually any of their business, and that's what the FA movement is about.

[(Anonymous)]

Most of that I agree with and I don't care if other people are fat or not, but most of the time the doctors really do have a point when they are trying to get the patients to lose weight. They are not trying to shame the patient just for the fun of it, like some of the FA folks are making it seem.

[(Anonymous)]

few doctors. there are plenty of stories of doctors REFUSING to listen to their own patients, and i am not talking just about people who are like 300 pounds. plus the idea that anyone can lose weight easily if they just try hard enough + keep it off is something that needs to die a swift death.

[(Anonymous)]

Plus the idea that anyone can lose weight easily if they just try hard enough + keep it off is something that needs to die a swift death.

Oh my god yes this so much. It's actually almost impossible to lose more than 10-15 pounds and keep it off indefinitely, here's a Cracked article about it that links to a bunch of studies on the subject (http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/fat-officially-incurable-according-to-science/).

[(Anonymous)]

Carrying extra weight does come with heath concerns, yes. But when -- as a friend of mine actually had happen -- you have been overweight most of your life and suddenly develop acute shortness of breath, and you go to the doctor and say, "all of a sudden I'm having periods where I can't breathe and have to sit down before I black out" and he comes back with "lose weight; obviously you're out of shape".... yeah. Not. Helpful. This happens a lot. I have dealt with some doctors who could look at a patient with a broken arm and tell them to lose weight. *eyeroll*

(she did find a doctor that listened and treated her, and that was through FA-friendly listings)

[(Anonymous)]

God, this. When I was thirteen I told my doctor that my period had never been regular and I felt like I was having PMS symptoms almost all the time. She just told me it was my weight and to eat more vegetables.

Ten years later I move and get a difference doctor and we come to find out I have PCOS. We get my hormones figured out and all that stuff starts to get better- including my weight. I mean, it's still hard to lose weight and it'll probably take years to get to my goal, but at least now diet and exercise actually DO something.

[kallanda_lee]

True; but not everything is caused by it.

For example, I have tendonitis which I originally got from over-exerting my tendons by hiking/climbing to castle on top of a rock.

Thin people can get that too, from the same activity. Fortunately I have a doc who's great about that, but currently I'm limping ad I can already see some people looking with a "oooh loookie, she's limping because she's fat" kind of look.

Obviously, some diseases are more frequent in fatter people, but that doesn't mean every ailment you have is related to that.

[(Anonymous)]

I've heard accounts of people who have had doctors refuse to listen to their medical complaints and attribute all kinds of unrelated symptoms to their weight, refusing to look into other causes and find the actual source of the problem (which often had zero to do with weight). There's also the issue of bedside manner and treating people with respect; it's one thing to make medical recommendations that someone take steps to improve their health, but treating someone like crap for their weight is unprofessional and cruel.

[(Anonymous)]

Who has two thumbs and dealt with this? This anon.

Went to the doctor because my lips would swell up at random intervals after I ate. It was getting annoying so I was hoping they could do an allergy test to figure out what I was eating that was causing it.

The bitch doctor I had's advice? "It's because you're fat, you should lose weight."

...really? Thanks, doc.

[insolentwitch]

My husband is bi-polar, he has struggled with it for as long as he can remember. He has PTSD, and other issues from serious events in his lfe. When we moved into a new area he went to see a local psych at the Mental Health Clinic (the only place our insurance covers). The doctor actually made him stand on a scale. He told him that all of his psychological problems were because he was over weight and not a Christian. and said that he just needed to excersize. No getting him on his meds (he was off at the time because of a coverage lapse), no talking about his real issues. He told him to lose some weight, read the Bible, and pray more. Mostly he emphasized the losing weight because he was obviously sad over being fat.

BTW: My husband does't give a damn about his weight, and he's not even that heavy.

A very close friend had to fight to get the doctors at the VA to look at his leg. He's over-weight (425 lbs) and was having trouble walking, far more than ever before. They told him to lose weight and ignored his complaints no matter what he said. He finally found a doctor who looked at his leg and realized there is a 21-pound growth on it.

I know a few more horror stories like this. I'm not saying they're the norm, just that this is a problem.

[(Anonymous)]

And his weight couldn't have had anything to do with the bipolar meds, which are notorious for causing weight gain.

[insolentwitch]

The doctor also didn't believe that most people who were diagnosed with bipolar actually had it. Even though my husband had been diagnosed with it repeatedly over the last 30 years by several different doctors. This guy was awful and had a history of dismissing overweight patients.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh god I thought I was the only one who had problems with doctors.

I have social anxiety and have a hard time keeping conversations going with strangers and people I don't know well. Because of this, I've always had problems with being taken seriously by doctors/nurses.

I'm about 35 lbs overweight with a sudden diagnosis of heart arrhythmia and shortness of breath. Sometimes I'll even become out of breath while I'm sitting. Things like putting on clothing or styling my long hair make me feel like my chest is going to burst open (rules out panic attack for me). I have become close to blacking out before. I have nuero symptoms too (muscle spasms that are becoming stronger and more frequent. had em for the past 3ish years). MS runs in the fam.

Got a nuero referral and the fucker didn't think muscle weakness, muscle spasms, spinal tingling, and family history of MS was enough cause for concern or anything. He told me it was probably an electrolyte imbalance and sent me on my way.

I just got a new primary and she keeps telling me to lose weight and control my anxiety. I've already lost 28lbs since August (without exercising. lack of appetite from stress). This didn't alarm her at all. She congratulated me. My white blood cell count is always high when I get blood work done. It never worries her. It's so frustrating. I fear I might have something more serious (MS, cancer, etc). I asked her for a 2nd nuero referral. She agreed but told me that if I continue being worried and getting referrals she won't support it and my insurance won't cover it. This is only the second time I've asked her for any kind of referral. I just want a fucking MRI for piece of mind. I feel powerless.

I'm considering switching clinics. My sister was constantly brushed off by her primary there when she started having her MS symptoms. They even forgot to notify her about an abnormal pap smear. Starting to think its just a really shitty clinic with shitty doctors.

[(Anonymous)]

Holy shit, how did any of those people get a medical license? I thought you actually needed a brain for one of those.

[insolentwitch]

I would definitely look into another clinic. I had severe pain and damage from a car accident for years that my HMO kept claiming was whiplash. It wasn't until I switched coverage that I started getting treatment. So changing can be a big help.

I'm sorry that you have to deal with such terrible doctors. I have a pretty severe anxiety problem. (I can barely leave the house and I tend to have panic attacks when talking to strangers/authority figures.) I used to get brushed off by my doctors a lot. It's taken me a lot of work to start asserting myself in a doctors office. Having somebody with me really helped me with that.

Your symptoms definitely seem like somebody should be doing something about them, so I hope your doctors provide you with the help and information that you need.

[(Anonymous)]

does that stupid doctor know how many fat Christians there are??

[insolentwitch]

The funny thing is that he wasn't anywhere close to thin. So the pot was definitely calling the kettle.

[(Anonymous)]

Slightly off-topic, but I really hate that nonsense that exercise/losing weight will cure mental illness (namely bipolar and depression). I've had that line thrown at me before, and all it does is make me feel even more insecure about my issues. I'm sorry that your husband had to put up with such a bullshit quack, and I hope he's doing all right now.

[(Anonymous)]

Losing weight, no. But exercise can be beneficial when it comes to depression as it releases endorphins. :D!

[(Anonymous)]

Who the Jesus fuck told you that? I inherited my bipolar (from a very active grandfather, no less), have gone through up and downswings in weight since I was diagnosed, and am less fucked up now that my weight is higher.

Antipsychotics and mood stabilizers (and antidepressants for some) usually cause weight gain, so weight loss is rarely on the table for people with bipolar disorder.

[insolentwitch]

He is doing alright now. It completely put him off going to get treated for quite awhile. He was furious over the whole ordeal. Especially since bi-polar, along with a lot of other psychological issues, runs in his family. Weight reduction wouldn't do anything for him.

I'm sorry that you've had to deal with this too. I've had it told to me as well and it always brings up all of my body issues too.

[(Anonymous)]

as someone who is training to be a doctor, this is actually something that's i've been trying to wrap my head around. like scientifically, weight gain has been directly related to so many health concerns so how are doctors supposed to not address/acknowledge that? like i get that they should probably do it in a non-asshole way and try and help the person find a lifestyle that works best for them/is reasonable but, to be very blunt and factual about it, some problems really do come from being overweight. like type 2 diabetes can actually be reversed by WEIGHT LOSS ALONE and i don't really know how one is supposed to sugarcoat that? totally open to opinions/discussion about this btw because i'm genuinely curious and trying to figure out how to be sensitive about it.

[(Anonymous)]

Sure, some conditions are caused by or related to being overweight. And some aren't. And sometimes they can have very similar symptoms. The problem is not that doctors recommend weight loss when it is appropriate to do so, it's when they fail to listen to what the patient is saying, and don't consider and rule out other possible causes before making a diagnosis and prescribing treatment.

[(Anonymous)]

thanks. i really do appreciate the reply.

this has left me wondering however, what would be the best way to go about it in the instance that someone is absolutely resistant to change and does not want to "accept" for lack of a better word that their weight is the source of the problem in the case that it really might be?

as a health care worker, you really can't do anything beyond tell a patient what their options are and help them understand their condition and educating them about it is a huge part of it. say if someone has misconceptions about their conditions which, idk they read from the internet or other people or something, and a doctor is trying to clarify that for them by going "no, it really is because of your weight" would that also make the doctor a bad guy?

while i am all for positive body image and every kind of acceptance, it's just kind of frustrating/confusing because i've run into a lot of dialogue about how BEING FAT IS NOT ACTUALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY ILLNESS AND ANY DOCTOR WHO TELLS YOU SO IS A LYING ASSHOLE whereas that's actually not true.

but it does make me upset that there are doctors out there who do not rule out other causes/diagnoses before jumping on the weight because yeah, that is pretty terrible.

[(Anonymous)]

I think it's just a case of needing to take things on a case by case basis and trying to be sensitive to patients' circumstances and needs. I know that sometimes you don't have the luxury of knowing what a patient's personal life is like and how that might factor in with their ability to lose weight, but it's always an important thing to consider. I think that some doctors and health care professionals tend to take the "shame people into losing weight" tact, which is never very effective in my experience. And honestly, some of those doctors are probably just thinking that if they're up front about it and point out that patients are overweight that they'll be compelled to lose weight, but life is a lot more complex than that. Most people who are overweight are very aware that they're overweight and that there are health risks associated with that, but there are a lot of individual circumstances and other factors that contribute to their being overweight in the first place, and can hinder weight loss.

... so, that really was kind of crap in the actual advice department, but I'd say the best advice is probably to just stop and think about things, consider that there are a lot of things coming into play here (and as a doctor you may not know all of them), and just try not to be a jerk when discussing weight with patients. You can express concern about weight and its relationship to certain health problems without coming off as accusatory. The fact that you're even asking this question shows that you're pretty thoughtful about the issue already, though.