[ SECRET POST #2181 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2181 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 100 secrets from Secret Submission Post #312.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 1 2 (again) - repeat ], [ 4 - trolls ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[insanenoodlyguy]

You are both an idiot depriving yourself and a shit friend who they don't deserve.

[(Anonymous)]

Whew. Glad I'm not the only one who felt this way.

[scarletsymphony]

wow, you have some strong feelings about this. why? she just sounds like a deeply insecure person.

which isn't the shittiest thing a friend could be.

[elephantinegrace]

I agree with this, and not just because I'm one of those people who pretends not to understand something just to see how the person explaining sees a particular thing.

[scarletsymphony]

<3 you being pointed? I'd argue if someone's curious to see how a person sees something they don't undestand, at least not fully.

[elephantinegrace]

Usually, if their views are different, I can learn something about why without bringing my opinion of it into it, and if it's the same then we can bond after I reveal mine.

[insanenoodlyguy]

then you are also shit. Why would you hide these things and waste everybody's time? You could get their explanation by asking them "hey what do you think of this?" and not being fake.

Pretty long text

[elephantinegrace]

Usually, when I ask for someone's opinion, they give me a speech that bores me to tears, and when I ask for how someone thinks something works, they give a truly informative explanation that shows why they hold that opinion. And by pretending I have no or little knowledge of what's going on, nobody spends time trying to convince me that my viewpoint is wrong. Basically:

"Hey, what do you think of this?"

"I think x and y. Why do you ask?"

"Well, to be honest, I thought a and b."

"...you suck."

vs.

"Okay, I don't understand a thing about this."

"Well, x and y, which will lead to z."

"Hmm, I never thought of it like that before. I guess it's not always a or b."

[insanenoodlyguy]

If it leads to lying to me, yes it is.

[scarletsymphony]

ah, I see. you're absolutist when it comes to lying to to friends, then? even with something that's arguably harmless to everyone? (except maybe OP)

[insanenoodlyguy]

If I waste my time explaining something to you you already know, it makes me look like an idiot, and makes me wonder what else you are lying about. It erodes trust.

And if I can't trust you, we aren't friends anymore.

[al28894]

Wait, there's a word for it?

[(Anonymous)]

I completely agree.
This secret could have been about my Ex who was a closet fangirl but loved getting me to tell her about fandom stuff. Eventually I found out and we laughed it off.

You know what else she was keeping secret? She was sleeping with two of my friends and had been for months.

A long running if "mild" is a sign that someone is not to be trusted.

[intrigueing]

LOL. You do realize how ridiculous this comment sounds, right?

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah it does honestly sound ridiculous. Up there with the "and then everyone applauded me for shouting at the mother of a crying baby on the bus" stories.
It it however genuinely true and while that one thing was hardly her only duplicity I really should have taken at as a sign.

[insanenoodlyguy]

Makes perfect sense to me.

It's not about the fandom thing alone. it's about trust in general.

Why would you lie to the people whom should presumably be most accepting to you? In Op's case it sounds like they are insecure. In that anon's case (and my personal shit) it's been the discovery that wasn't the only lie.

[(Anonymous)]

whom should presumably be most accepting to you

that's a HUGE assumption for you to make

[patch592]

If someone is comfortable maintaining a lie long term even a smallish one, if it's maintained, says something about their character.

A lie that gets me out of a night out I don't fancy is one I'm only going to tell once or maybe twice as a follow-up to cover myself but if I say I'm a fan of a book/actor/movie/musician that's a frequent topic of conversation between my friends then it's a lie I keep having to tell, many times per conversation and what's the point in that?

IMO the OP likes the extra attention being the outsider grants them, it means they stand out within their group and they don't have to offer any opinions that may be controversial.

[(Anonymous)]

That's an utterly ridiculous correlation to make.

[insanenoodlyguy]

X Lies about A

x Lies about B

Therefore, Maybe people who lie to me about a are people who could lie to me about other things.

Not that illogical.

[nyxelestia]

Your friends (and family, and any other human being) can always be lying to you. Anyone can at anytime always be lying to you, regardless of how "honest" they come across as. Yes, finding out someone lied about something tells you that they lied, but that's confirmation, not revelation.

The world moves on, because everyone lies, and sometimes you're the one being lied to instead of the one lying. I'd rather my friend be lying about fandom involvement and indulge my blathering rather than be "honest" to hide something much more serious.

[al28894]

Oh, so true.Also, I found out that sometimes being "lied" really isn't so bad, DEPENDING on the context and time-frame. Take both these out however, and you're glad you haven't been to any of my family reunions.

[(Anonymous)]

You have no concept of scale do you?

[(Anonymous)]

well, it IS insanenoodlyguy.

dude has no concept of a lot of things. it's all black and white to him which makes his world rather bland.

+1

[(Anonymous)]

Wow. For once I absolutely agree with you.