[ SECRET POST #2316 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2316 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.
[Band of Brothers]


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03.
[Princess Princess]


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04.
[Once Upon a Time]


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05.
[Doctor Who]


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06.
[toby turner/tobuscus/tobygames]


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07.
[Common Law]


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08.
[James May's Man Lab]


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09.
[The Enigma of Amigara Fault]


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10.
[Mad Men]


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11.
[Lost Girl]


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12.
[Twilight]


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13.
[Monsters Inc]


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14.
[Archer]


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15.
[Super Junior / Infinite]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 062 secrets from Secret Submission Post #331.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 - broken links ], [ 1 (???) - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 2 - empty comments ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

So instead of getting counseling to work on your issues you decided to make a secret to reassure yourself that not loving your kids is normal? Okay then!

[bored_bitch]

Because it is absolutely mandatory for someone to love another being, just because that other being happened to come out of their body.

Because that's how love works.

Of course.

[(Anonymous)]

Please don't ever become a parent. This isn't talking about unwanted pregnancies and putting kids up for adoption. These are parents who wanted kids and when they got them decided loving them was too much effort.

[childings.livejournal.com]

Well if you chose to raise a kid, you should love that child, otherwise you don't have any business raising them. Christ

[(Anonymous)]

this. seriously, wtf is wrong with people

[visp]

So... how do you ensure that you will love the child(ren) you have?

[silverau]

The above anon's comment recommended counseling, for one thing... but apparently that's too extreme of an option because there's nothing wrong with not loving your own kid at all, right?

But seriously, you're acting like emotions can't even be controlled at all and that's not true. It's not easy to control your emotions, but it is possible. If you have postpartum depression or some other psychological thing interfering then you may need some extra help (and even if you don't counseling could be helpful), but the implication that love totally can't be controlled at all and that a parent therefore shouldn't even TRY is... baffling.

[(Anonymous)]

IAWTC, but I think the problem is that too many people have children because "they're supposed to", or because "it's time", and they don't really think about whether or not they actually WANT children in the first place.

I think there's more people who have mixed feelings about their children than will admit it.

[silverau]

Are you kidding me?? Are you seriously implying that parents who don't love their kids shouldn't get counseling??? I guess if the kid ends up with severe emotional disorders or attachment problems or a just plain crappy life due to being raised by someone who doesn't love them it's okay with you, then. I just. I can't. Congratulations, you've just said the single most disgusting thing I've ever seen on the Internet.

[(Anonymous)]

Luckily complete strangers on the internet can put you right about your entire existence with their handy mindreading skills. Okay then!

[(Anonymous)]

Oh look it's the OP who still doesn't understand that not everyone has their selfish, warped point of view about parenting.

[(Anonymous)]

Chill. This says nothing about OP's capacity to take care of her children. We are often given this huge social expectation that our hearts will be bursting with magical sparkly love for our babies, and sometimes that shit doesn't happen right away. It certainly didn't for me. I had to *learn* to love my kid the same way I would have to learn to love any other human being; it didn't happen overnight. And sometimes that love gets buried under any manner of things. For me, it was post-partum depression and an unhealthy relationship with his father. Now it's the strain on my time, emotions and finances. Yeah, I love my kid, but I had to learn to, and I had to learn that love *isn't* always magical and sparkly, but just about enduring (with) someone because you can't imagine the alternative.

I had to learn what love actually was, and I had to learn how to do it and feel it. But in that interim, I still took care of his material/physical needs and his emotional ones, as well. Posting a secret about maybe not loving her child doesn't make the OP a shit parent.