fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2447 ]

[ SECRET POST #2447 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2447 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03.

__________________________________________________

04.

__________________________________________________

05.

__________________________________________________

06.

__________________________________________________

07.

__________________________________________________

08.

__________________________________________________

09.

__________________________________________________

10.

__________________________________________________

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 061 secrets from Secret Submission Post #350.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I don't think the one in four women are raped in their life figures are remotely accurate.

They're from deeply flawed studies but I don't have the energy to argue it, because like creationists there's so many pre-canned arguments that have been developed to explain away all the issues that it's a complete mess properly refuting it, and they'll never listen anyway.

Booooo.

You mean flawed as in some women incorrectly don't count things like people purposefully getting them drunk and having sex with them when they pass out as rape, so the 1 in 4 number should probably be higher?

No.

As in it's lower outside of war torn somalia.

No actually I am pretty sure the 1 in 4 statistic is QUITE high.

Doesn't sound to high to me, but I can see that your definition of rape can make a difference, yeah.

Like, I have been fucked in my sleep (a misunderstanding) and been guilted into accepting something I really shouldn't have let happen, and am classifying both instances as rape, but I would never go so far as to report any of them. I think this kind of thing is very, very common. For both sexes. The aggressor might never even notice.

I'm pretty much the opposite...I've been subject to some boorish, annoying and inconsiderate male sexual behavior that I know some people would classify as assault or rape, but I don't. Boorish, annoying and inconsiderate does not equal criminal, IMO. (As a result, I tend to agree with OP about the statistic.)

Rape is defined by a lack of consent. A crime is a forbidden act in a society. The two definitions don't exist on the same level. They neither rule each other out nor depend on each other.

Wikipedia: "Rape is a type of sexual assault usually involving sexual intercourse, which is initiated by one or more persons against another person without that person's consent."
=/=
"The term crime does not, in modern times, have any simple and universally accepted definition,[1] but one definition is that a crime, also called an offence or a criminal offence, is an act harmful not only to some individual, but also to the community or the state (a public wrong). Such acts are forbidden and punishable by law."

Well, let me state my position in completely different terms, then: I do not believe that consent is automatically invalidated if it's given with less than whole-hearted enthusiasm by a competent person, provided that a real option to withhold consent exists, is considered and then is rejected.

My husband trying to persuade me to have sex when I'm really not in the mood may be an irritating habit, but I can (and sometimes do) choose to say no with full confidence that he will respect my choice, even if he doesn't particularly like it. If I give in just to make him happy or not hurt his feelings, then I don't consider it to be rape or assault, even if my preference would have been not to.

Put another way: I reserve the right to choose to do things I'm not thrilled about doing, if I judge them to be worth troubling myself with, and I will not have others cast as villains because I chose to take their wishes into account.

I'm aware that this places me in the minority around here. I just disagree with the prevailing opinion.

your situation is not everyone's situation, though. it's great that you have the freedom, security, safety, and mental standing to have that distinction with your spouse. I do, too. I didn't always have this with other partners, and neither do a lot of other people. If you don't want to consider something you experience as ___, that's your prerogative, so long as you are not discounting other people's experiences. If someone tries to question it, they are wrong so long as you are not discounting other people's experiences. Basically, only you have the right to determine if you've been assaulted or not (unless said incident runs up against legal guidelines in your area, in which other input matters in that kind). With that, though, you don't have the right to decide if other people have been assaulted (save again for that legal guideline bit).

I agree. I don't believe 75% of women out there have been raped. The number is way too high.

...shouldn't one out of four be 25%?

rapists can't do math, silly

I'm clueless as to how anyone could obtain a figure that would accurately reflect the percentage of women who've been raped. Unless one conducts extensive studies in any and every country of the world, of course.
Even then, the distribution must be super uneven, and the concept of "rape" is so different in different cultures. IDEK.

Yes, RAINN totally lies to us all. RAINN also says that men can get raped. What a bunch of bullshit. Evil feminazis corrupted all the statistics to play victim on tumblr, bla bla.

While I believe the number of women (and people of all sexes, frankly) who've been sexually assaulted is absurdly high, I don't quote that statistic because unless a nationwide survey was done with a reliable way to control for a variety of factors (such as the tendency of many people to hide their assault out of shame or denial), there's little chance it's accurate. You can't test a relatively small pool of people and apply the results to millions more other people; that's a huge problem with statistics in general.

Out of six of my closest female friends, one has been sexually assaulted twice and I've been assaulted once.

None of us have been raped, but assaulted, yeah.

I've had two close friends who were raped and I've had to deal with a few creeps myself (not rape, not even assault, just a definite lack-of-respect-for-boundaries). I believe it. I know the plural of anecdote is not data, but my experiences make it depressingly easy to believe that even in the United States, rape and sexual assault are not unusual.

Edited 2013-09-15 04:22 (UTC)

I thought that statistic was for rape and sexual assault for the US and it's an old statistic, meaning it might have been true at one time (population growth, decrease in sexual crime rate, etc.).

From 1995 to 2005, sexual violence against U.S. female residents age 12 or older declined 64 percent from 5.0 per 1,000 females to 1.8, and remained unchanged through 2010, according to a report, Female Victims of Sexual Violence, 1994-2010, released today by the Justice Department’s Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS).

That's per year and it is additive. So, using an average of 3.4 per 1000, and given the CDC's life expectancy of about 79 and that many rape victims are under 30, let's use 50 years, 50*3.4 = 170 per 1000, which is 17% or about 1 in 6. But, that doesn't include female children under 12. Of course, I made a lot of assumptions and the National Crime Victimization Survey sample might not be as representative as it should be.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2447 ]

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

nayrt

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

no subject

no subject

AYRT

Re: AYRT

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)

Re: It's that time again (non-fandom confessions)