[ SECRET POST #2618 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2618 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 039 secrets from Secret Submission Post #374.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

14-16 is not an abnormal size! I am 14-16, and if anyone called me fat I would laugh my fucking ass off.

[(Anonymous)]

Well, Cumberbatch's face does look surprisingly apropos with horns and deer ears...

Re: Spelling "women" as "womxn."

[herpymcderp]

...wat. Oh I get it because there's no Y in WOMYN HURR HURR HURR DO YOU GET IT GUISE.

[inkdust]

That makes total sense to me.

[spacebabie]

[(Anonymous)]

Bit of a gut at least.

http://i.imgur.com/C6xknlL.jpg

[kamino_neko]

Its discussion thread is still there, with the link still in it.

Working WTFs

[(Anonymous)]

Today, about a dozen of us were working in the paint department, moving things around. All of us are in uniform with badges. Over the PA we hear, "Customer service to the paint counter." Cue a dozen people looking around for this customer, who is nowhere to be found. Turns out the customer had walked right by us and found another worker in a completely different area of the store to page us for her.

So what are some fave/recent WTFs you guys have had at work?

Re: SHE. IS. AXE. WOMAN.

[chardmonster]

Johanna can spell it however she wants.



xlevator

Re: Spelling "women" as "womxn."

[greenvelvetcake]

At least you can pronounce womyn. I'm trying to say "womxn" aloud and it's not going well.

Re: Tell me what you like about yourself, FS

[iceyred]

Taking care of people is a skill! People are lucky to have you in their lives.

[(Anonymous)]

Yup, that's really the only way, but you're so dependent on a specific curriculum and I'd love if there was a way to pay for fic all year round, whether that is in fic, money, or something else! I mean, would it be acceptable if you gave people gifts/vouchers instead of just money? idk :(

Re: Sleep disorders

[herpymcderp]

Sleep paralysis, sometimes. Used to be pretty bad when I was a teenager, but I hardly ever get it these days. Stiiiilll sucks though.

Re: Spelling "women" as "womxn."

[diet_poison]

what

I have never seen that

what is the point of it?

I'm a woman not a...that

Re: WELP.

[(Anonymous)]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

Re: Share your drawerfic/WIPS.

[(Anonymous)]

I've been sitting on a Dean/Cas AU fic where Dean owns a restaurant with Benny and Cas is homeless for a month and a half now, because I overestimated my time this semester. So, uh, here's part of it. I do plan to finish it, after April.

There’s a man in the bathroom, bent over the sink. His hair is unevenly wet, large drops of water are falling from the tips of bangs back down into the bowl of the sink. There are soap bubbles, catching the light in pinks and blues, above his ear. He’s got a toothbrush clenched between his teeth, white foam on his lips while he scrubs at the ragged beard on his cheeks with both hands. His eyes are squeezed shut. His clothes are ragged and layered, they still don’t look heavy enough for the chill outside. His shoes are mismatched. One has a hole large enough that Dean can see his sock through it. Dean takes him in with two quick blinks and then clears his throat, and, aiming for a tone that conveys who-are-you-and-what-are-you-doing-in-my-bathroom, says, “Hey.”

The man startles in a way Dean is too familiar with. His eyes snap open and over to Dean, blood-shot, blue, surrounded by dark bags. Déjà vu hits Dean across the back of his head, a flash of memory, or, no, it must be vivid dream. Blue eyes, staring down at him, a hand, burning hot on his icy shoulder, a rasp of voice, “—this one’s al—”. Dean shakes himself back into the moment, watching the man’s nostrils flare. Watching him yank the toothbrush out of his mouth and drop into half a crouch, hands out away from his body, tensed. He looks like he’s ready to brawl, or run, and then he blinks.

The man’s eyes open huge and his mouth gapes to match it. He rakes his gaze up and down Dean, lingers over his arm, his shoulder, the way people do, someday Dean will get used to it. If there was color in his face, it drains away. His hands drop and his knees straighten and he says, “It’s you,” in a voice that sounds like maybe he’s been gargling with whiskey nonstop for a couple of years.

Dean grimaces. He can’t help it. This is exactly why he didn’t want to go on some stupid talk show, he should never have allowed Charlie to talk him into it, but she’s a persuasive little shit and she was right about the donations. They’ve gone through the roof since he whored himself out on primetime. The amount of people that want to grab him and gush like they fucking know him has, unfortunately, increased in equal measure. He grumbles, “Yeah, surprise, probably not what you imagined when you broke into my shop.”

“The lights were on and the door wasn’t locked.” The words spring forth too quickly, like they’ve been prepared, like the guy was holding them on the tip of his tongue, just in case someone stumbled upon him. He startles at the sound of his own voice, blinks and visibly collects himself. “I mean. I didn’t intend to—I wasn’t trying to break in. I knocked. I just wanted—I thought, since you had no customers—I could just—” A giant dollop of soap falls off of his chin and lands on his shoe, and the guy cuts off with a frustrated, humiliated little sound, fumbling forward to turn the sink off and reaching for a wad of paper towels.

“I’m sorry,” his gaze darts up to Dean’s face, and then away, and there’s too much in his expression, exhaustion and hunger and fear and anger and Dean knows it all, knows it too well, it makes his guts twist up so hard that he almost doesn’t catch the guy mumbling, “I’ll just—I’ll get out of your hair, I’m—”

“Hey, hey, whoa, slow down.” The guy pays Dean no mind, scrubbing the paper towels over his face and back across his hair, leaving behind streaks of pink skin and grime. His hands are battered and too thin. The word is gaunt, Dean thinks, and the space up under his ribs aches, it feels squeezed tight and raw. Dean has to remind himself to take deep, slow breaths, he balls his right hand into a fist and is grateful that the left doesn’t shake, can’t shake, not anymore. He says, ignoring what it costs him to keep his voice steady, “Stop, I wasn’t, I’m not throwing you out, man.”

Re: Spelling "women" as "womxn."

[cassandraoftroy]

"womwn" sounds like someone trying to make a lightsaber noise.

wwwooommm... wwwnnn.... wwwwooommm... kshh!

Re: Life's Little Annoyances

[dethtoll]

I have a flight of steps on the outside of the house leading from my front door (which is on the side of the house, I live upstairs) down into the side yard. There's a particular step there that is a deathtrap in winter, due to the way water drips from a roof corner on to it. It freezes and is basically impossible to keep clear.

I slipped on it today.

Landed on my ass and slid all the way to the bottom. Fortunately the ass was fat so I was unharmed, just my dignity was damaged. But my pants were a wreck and had to go in the wash (eh, overdue for it anyway) and I've been in a shitty mood about it since. Especially since coming back upstairs after dinner I SLIPPED ON THE STEP AGAIN

Oh, and a more constant annoyance -- the intercom ringtone for the house phone handsets. It's different from the regular ringtone and is completely unchangable. That wouldn't be so bad if it weren't this horrible BWAWWWWNNNNNNNK sound. I swear I want to throw it every time it goes off.

[(Anonymous)]

The failbar is for pre-filtered secrets. When they slip by and then are removed from the main post, they aren't relinked. Just unnecessary effort really.

Re: WELP.

[(Anonymous)]

Happy birthday!

[(Anonymous)]

I can't help but think your little disclaimer about "binary" was inserted specifically to start the wank you say you're trying to avoid.

[chardmonster]

Hey, my Mardi Gras post in general--someone's pointed out it's a problem. I'd expected the image to collapse (because I forgot how this stuff works, apparently).

Can you make the image into a link? I can't fix it now that it's been responded to.

Re: Tell me what you like about yourself, FS

[bribedwithbacon]

Thanks, it took me a while to be okay with my eyes, but now I'm fond of them. And no, it's just me who has it. c: Though I do have family members who have strictly green eyes or strictly blue eyes.

Re: WELP.

[herpymcderp]

:D <-- I did this face because this was the first comment.

[(Anonymous)]

I'll complain about Legolas. He was completely pointless in this movie.