[ SECRET POST #2972 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2972 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 072 secrets from Secret Submission Post #425.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

02. http://i.imgur.com/ylhvJfI.png

[(Anonymous)]

Who thought that color scheme was a good idea?

[kaijinscendre]

Me in 2005 when I wanted my AIM window to look badass.

[sarillia]

There's more that affects the way you're noticed than the way you look. Mannerisms, speaking style, posture, gait, all kinds of things go into that.

[manzana]

Yeah, wasn't there an anecdote about Marilyn Monroe walking down the street with someone who was flabbergasted that no one was recognizing her until she changed the way she walked?

[(Anonymous)]

I feel like a lot of it is body language/context/etc. Like, you know she's a spy, so you know what to look for. But I bet she could make herself seem like an American housewife, or a French mechanic, or whatever with vocal and body cues.

Like, I never much bought in the movies that no one knows Clark Kent is Superman, but some comics artists like Quietly do a great job of completely changing the way he holds himself in and out of costume. Besides, who assumes your neighbor is a spy/superhero? They might get a few "Hey, you look kinda like so-and-so"....

[(Anonymous)]

Back in the 60s that would work. In today's world where there is facial recognition software, I highly doubt such distinctive looking people would be able hide. Especially famous ones.

[(Anonymous)]

On a semi-related note, I'm amazed at how different Keri Russell looks on The Americans when she goes in disguise. She has a different sort of beauty than Scarlett Johansson, but I think she'd be just as stunning in full makeup and a skin tight black outfit. So yeah, I can buy Black Widow as a spy. We just have never seen her not looking like herself, really.

[(Anonymous)]

That's the most unrealistic thing you've taken away from the MCU movies?

[(Anonymous)]

It's not the kind of spy movie where that kind of realism is even remotely at home.

It's just not.

I love that kind of spy movie / spy story, probably more than I like superhero movies, but I don't think you can judge one genre by the standards and logic of a different one.

[(Anonymous)]

Are you saying that redheaded women can't do fieldwork for an intelligence agency?

Interestingly, in the comics, Natasha originally was a Soviet/Russian agent, and dressed in pretty normal civilian clothes. The tights were her superhero/action hero costume, for working in the Avengers.

That's sort of forgotten now, I guess.

[ill_omened]

Spying =/= surveillance.

She'd be too noticeable for directed surveillance, but spying is a huge, huge encompassing field of a lot of things.

[(Anonymous)]

She's still doing better than several variations of James Bond, who's supposed to be a dedicated spy and doesn't even have the excuse of being a part-time superhero. Natasha at least uses disguises, builds cover stories suitable for and taking advantage of her looks, and doesn't tell baddies her real name. For that alone, she's already got a leg up on half of what TV Tropes calls martini-flavoured fictional spies. Add in that her universe isn't a dedicated spy universe where there is grey-coloured skullduggery in the back corridors of power, but a bright splashy superhero story where we're not even trying for secret identities anymore, and I think she's pretty much in line with the rest of her universe.

And, seriously, you pick on Natasha? Nick Fury is Samuel L. Jackson in a black leather duster and an eye-patch using a helicarrier as a base. If we're picking most distinctive-looking spies in the movies, here ...

[nightscale]

But aside from being movie-attractive she is relatively normal looking and doesn't stand out much, and while her hair is distinctive I can see her donning a wig or dying it if need be. Plus there's more to disguising oneself than just changing your hair colour and I can imagine that Natasha was trained in all of those.

[diet_poison]

I kinda see her as more of a info-gathering assassin special agent...type.

Like no she couldn't walk into a supermarket wearing that outfit and somehow be a successful spy. But the stuff like sneaking into places, using emotional manipulation to get what she wants, playing mind games...she's good at that.

[(Anonymous)]

Did you watch Iron Man 2? Black Widow played a secretary and made Stark believe that's all she was. Why wouldn't you believe she could change her walk, her demeanor, hell, her hair color to fit the situation?

Getting meta as fuck

[(Anonymous)]

Okay, but look at Scarlett Johansson. She's been able to play anything from a nanny, to an alien, to a maid, to a nerd, to a sexy spy... and she's believe in all those roles

There's no reason to believe's acting abilities are any worse than Scarlett. And she can dye her hair, for fuck's sake.

[(Anonymous)]

Huh.

Of all the actors in all of the Marvel movies, I think Scarlett Johansson must be the most normal-looking -- sure, she's very pretty, but not in a way that stands out. Look at her size, stature, facial features. Give her her natural hair color, remove all make-up, put her in street clothing, and she'd blend into anything. The add whatever surface elements are required (hair, clothing), and she'd deliver the disguise.

(Gwyneth Paltrow, I feel, would do harder to disguise herself. She's tall and willowy, and whether you like her or not, quite distinctive. Or check out Zoe Saldana, who does not have some standard look either -- or hey, Cobie Smulders, who I think looks super-yummy, but that jawline and those eyes...again with the size.)

[(Anonymous)]

If you think attractive, distinctive redheaded women who stand out in a crowd can't be spies, OP, then I suggest you look up Anna Chapman.

[(Anonymous)]

I think you're forgetting how much of her "look" is hair/clothes/make up. Have you ever seen one of those before/after shots of porn stars? With a few rare exceptions, you wouldn't recognize them. I guarantee you that with greasy bedhead, a baggy cardigan and mom jeans and no make up-- never mind doing more devious things to disguise one's appearance or demeanor-- it would work.

[(Anonymous)]

You seem to be assuming she does the sort of spying roles where she's not supposed to be noticed. Of the two canonical assignments we know she's had, she was supposed to catch Tony's attention so she could keep an eye on him, and she was supposed to be identified by the bad guys during the Avengers so she could use them interrogating her to find out information. When she was required to play a different role, she used different clothes and an artificial face.

[(Anonymous)]

You spray that paint.

[(Anonymous)]

There is no "how." You just have to do it. Keep telling yourself you're being stupid until you get over it.

Transcript

[(Anonymous)]

Image: Black Widow

Text: I get unreasonably annoyed by Black Widow as a spy in the movies because I think she’s just way too distinctive and recognizable for it to work.

I feel like a good spy thing would take people that are inconspicuous, average and boring looking over people like her.

I know she’s supposed to be able to disguise herself but I just struggle to find it believeable. I know it’s a movie and I should just let it go but I can’t. Every time I see her it just frustrates me. I don’t know why it doesn’t apply to any other character.

I feel like this one thing is ruining my ability to enjoy the MCU but I just don’t know how to stop and suspend disbelief. It’s really stupid and I hate it.

[ariakas]

Eh, it depends on what kind of work she's doing. For surveillance, no, no that would never work. People notice and remember pretty young women.

As something like a honey trap? Sure, she'd be great. The only problem is those sort of peaked during the cold war, and the influx of women into intelligence positions/positions of power slowly chipped away at their usefulness as assets. While yes, there absolutely still are men out there who can delude themselves into thinking "hey, this pretty girl half my age is just ~really~ interested in my job!" their female co-workers will see through it in a heartbeat.