fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3015 ]

[ SECRET POST #3015 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3015 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Puzzle & Dragons (Japanese Mobile Phone game)]

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03.

[Thunderbirds]

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04.

[Avenged Sevenfold]

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05.

[Umineko no Naku Koro ni]

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06.

(Donald Tusk, President Of The European Council)

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07.

[The Hobbit]

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08.

[Nicholas Lea]

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09.

[Vocaloid]

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10.

[Grimm/Angel]

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11.

(the Tale of the Princess Kaguya)

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12.

[Jimmy Carr and Sarah Millican]

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13.

[The Phantom of the Opera]

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14.

[How to get away with murder/Liza Weil]

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15.

[Once Upon a Time]

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16.

[Inazuma Eleven]

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17.

(Aiden Turner in Poldark)

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18.

[Star Trek: Into Darkness]

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19.

[Nathan Fillion]

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20.

[Harry Potter]

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21.

[Sherlock]

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22.

[MCU/The Avengers (film series)]

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23.

[Gillian Anderson]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 05 pages, 106 secrets from Secret Submission Post #431.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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You know what? Fuck you. It's partly because of people like you, with ridiculous notions of "queer cred," that so many bi people DON'T come out of the closet.

Oh, you've mostly been with men? You're not REALLY bi, then. You're just gay and you won't admit it/you're just straight and you're trying to get attention from men. Oh, you've mostly been with women? You're not REALLY bi, then. You're just lesbian and you won't admit it/you're just straight but you're a pussy.

Oh, you're bi? Get the fuck out of our space, traitor. Go be with your own kind and leave the REAL lesbians alone. You having a dick in you has tainted you. You're disgusting.

Oh, you're bi? You'll totally be in a threesome with me, right? Also, uh, I can't really date you because you're just gonna cheat on me. Everyone knows bi people can't stay faithful.

Oh, you're bi? Ew, that's so gross, I need a REAL man.

Oh, you're bi? That's bullshit, men can't be bi. You're just too much of a coward to come out. Piss off.

So fuck you saying it's "comfier" to be out of the closet. It's NOT. It's an endless parade of shit from all sides, people making assumptions about you and treating you like you're an intruder or a fake or something disgusting and worthless. And now you come along and dangle "queer cred" around like it's something fucking medal that YOU, oh super special wonderful sparkly you, get to dish out to people that YOU find deserving. Just like every single other fuck who makes us run back into the closet.

Fuck. You.

+1,000,000

I think you listed all the reasons I don't date bi people in one breath, lol.

But no seriously, the fidelity one is a huge turn-off. At some level, bisexuals will crave the gender I'm not and I don't want to deal with that. Just like how hetero/homo or asexual/sexual is a bad matchup, so is bisexual/monosexual (er, whatever the term is). Not saying it can't work out, just that the non-bisexual party might end up feeling inadequate.

Well, congratulations on proving their complaints are legitimate!

"Monosexual" was popularized by a bi woman trying to drum up gay vs bi controversy so she could sell more copies of her book.

What?

Seriously? That doesn't make sense. All bisexuality means is that you can or are capable of feeling attraction to either genders.

By that logic I could claim that my boyfriend being able to feel attraction to women means he could be attracted to women other than me and thus make me feel inadequate.

You sound like a paper skinned, and ignorant egomaniac. Thanks for admitting it so people know to be wary of you.

ayrt

...holy shit, all of what I listed is bullshit! That was the entire point!

A bisexual person is not more likely to cheat than someone who isn't bisexual. That's completely fucking ridiculous. Yeah, they'd still be attracted to people of the gender that you're not, but that doesn't mean they're going to cheat. If you're dating someone who's your same sexuality, then guess what? They're not gonna suddenly stop being attracted to other people. They might even find some other people more attractive than you. Yet that doesn't make you assume EVERYONE is incapable of fidelity, does it?

Look, dude, replace "bisexual" with a member of some other group, and replace everything I said with stereotypes about that group, and imagine someone saying in response, "you just listed all the reason I don't date men/women/black people/Asian people/Hispanic people/Arab people/Indian people/First Nations people/etc, in one breath, lol," and tell me you wouldn't side-eye the fuck out of that person.

No, actually, I would say all of that. I once dated a farmer and it was obvious we weren't going to work out. I get that a lot of people are really open-minded, good for them, but I need a lot of common ground in order for a relationship to work out. The idea of having a relationship with someone who has vastly different values in things that I value would be impossible. See my initial comment: I value sex, therefore, I wouldn't date an asexual. It's important to me that my partner is monosexual; not so important that they like pistachios, etc., etc.

Also I'm only using personal instances here, but both bisexuals I knew ended up so much happier with bisexuals. So yeah, I think it is a valid category. I don't have distrust of them, just wouldn't want to date them and I wish people like you would consider my reasons for not wanting to date a bisexual as valid as my not wanting to date an asexual. I've literally never been called close-minded for wanting to fuck, but for not wanting to fuck a bisexual? Or a black guy? Jesus, it's like we're not allowed to have preferences anymore. Just like how you're allowed to seek "X" (however specific X is, depending on how picky you are), I'm allowed to exclude it.

Sorry if your comment was meant to be in jest, it's just very close to how I thought! Guess I'm the idiot in the "don't pretend to be stupid lest you attract actual idiots" here....

are u trolling...

"Sorry if your comment was meant to be in jest, it's just very close to how I thought"

Maybe that should make you think then, instead of desperately defending your attitudes like a butt hurt idiot.

not wanting to fuck a bisexual? Or a black guy? Jesus, it's like we're not allowed to have preferences anymore.

Well, MY preference is not to hear about how all bisexuals or black men are homogenous hive mind entities. So you see, we both have preferences and are allowed to express them, and also declare them full of shit.

--Rogan

you can date or not date whoever you want but if you actually believe bi people are more likely to cheat by virtue of being bi then holy shit, you are ignorant.

being bi doesn't mean you simultaneously crave male and female sexual partners. it means you are CAPABLE of being attracted to both men and women.

Edited 2015-04-07 06:48 (UTC)

Your reasons for not wanting to date a bisexual person aren't valid. They're based on an incorrect idea of what "bisexual" means. If your preferences are based on a bunch of bullshit, irrational, and bigoted assumptions, then people get to call you on them.

And yes, you're an idiot if you couldn't tell that that post wasn't a serious list of actual traits, considering the entire last paragraph was about being treated like shit for being bi. Speaking of that last paragraph, I wonder how many bi people you've dated without realizing it? There's a lot of us who are very firmly ion the closet because pic attitudes like yours. Many of your monogamous relationships might very well have been with people who are attracted to both genders, and you just never knew.

Jesus Christ, it's like I'm really on /lgbt/.

Wha..?

I'm sorry to say, but feeling inadequate is all in your own head. As others have said, claiming that bisexuals will always "crave" the gender that their partner isn't is like saying that any man (or woman) you date will always "crave" other men/women. For me, personally, when I fall in love with someone, I fall in love with the person. What bisexuality means to me is that I don't care what genitalia someone has, or what their legal gender is. The physical attributes I'm attracted to are interesting/brightly colored eyes and long-fingered hands. Which can belong to any gender.

Just to blow your mind a little more, I am also polyamorous. However, just because I can have romantic feelings for more than one person at a time doesn't mean I do by default. Of the five relationships I've had, four of them have been.. *gasp* monogamous. I didn't feel I was missing out on the gender I wasn't dating OR that I "craved" an open relationship. I was fine and happily monogamous. In fact, my longest relationship, which lasted 15 years? HE cheated on ME.

Sorry, I get a little passionate about this because I'm tired of being painted with this brush that's not my color at all.

No actually, because they might crave something you legitimately can't provide. Think of someone who wants biological children and has a partner who is infertile. If they break up, sure, some people would judge them, but I think it's a natural enough inclination.

A strap-on/fleshlight cannot compare to the real thing.

Okay, that's fine to hear. But my definition of polyamorous is different from yours, as is my definition of bisexual. Just as you are an example of a faithful lover, I can provide examples of bisexuals who turned unfaithful because they craved cock/cunt because they identify as bisexual, not because they don't care about the genitals, but because they like both sets of genitals. I don't think this second group should be shunned -- honestly, I don't even think "infidelity" should be shunned. Regarding your partner of 15 years, I'm sorry to hear that they cheated on you, but perhaps monogamy just wasn't their thing? Just as polyamory's not my thing and I don't want a relationship with it.

but perhaps monogamy just wasn't their thing

No, it means they're a selfish asshole who lacks the dignity and self control to break up with a person before fucking someone else. If someone cheats and THEN tries to just blame it on poly as an orientation (oh no poor baby they were just oppressed) they are doubly worthless as a human being (but I'm not ayrt).

Selfish assholes who aren't worth your time or attention are going to come in every single flavor. You're just being a nimrod.

(no subject)

lb_lee - 2015-04-07 01:43 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

diet_poison - 2015-04-07 06:52 (UTC) - Expand

Troll food

pantasma - 2015-04-07 21:43 (UTC) - Expand

At some level, bisexuals will crave the gender I'm not

The only person in the world who will ever date you and never crave another is your own hand, sadsack. The people you date will not stop having sex drives or senses that acknowledge human beings that are not you.

Straight people cheat. Gay people cheat. Every category cheats, you're a shitty jealous weirdo, these are all things we have to deal with and the only thing you can change is the latter.

actually, my hand desperately craves the touch of another

it's a pretty dysfunctional relationship honestly, i'm thinking of calling it quits

(nayrt, for clarity) (and on a non-joke note, keep holding it down)

"sadsack" what a great insult xD

*rolls eyes* Oh please. My husband's bi and mostly attracted to women, but he chose ME to have a relationship with him. I'm not going to turn him into my self-hate puppet, and I'm not going to tell him what HE feels and HE wants. If he chose me, then I'm who he wants. End of story.

And I have never ONCE felt inadequate compared to the women he's been with. If he wanted to be with a woman, he wouldn't have dated me!

--Rogan

If you honestly think a partner who is only attracted to your gender won't ever be attracted to anyone but you, you are seriously deluding yourself.

Bi man *married* to gay man here. Fuck right off. Your insecurities are your problem.

+ one million. Holy gods, can we not be 'more queer than thou'? Jayzus.

This. Thanks.

(Bi person of the non-50/50 variant here who prefers "queer" and really has run into a bunch of the above. WTF is wrong with people?)

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