[ SECRET POST #3469 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3469 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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03. [WARNING for discussion of rape]




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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 43 secrets from Secret Submission Post #496.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

02. https://66.media.tumblr.com/42fa61f2ad26385673d2c0ca1105ae1a/tumblr_o9ketwRMTZ1sivacmo1_540.png

[(Anonymous)]

Reylo? Sansa/Ramsay?

[(Anonymous)]

I literally just saw Sansa/Littlefinger hate on my dash, so that's my vote.

OP, it sucks that you feel you can't squee openly. I know many people in the Reylo camp who made a side blog so that they didn't hurt friends who are triggered by the ship. That way, they could participate in the fandom as much as they wished, be extra considerate of people they care for, and not have to deal with fandom drama on their main blog.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

Reylo shipper here.

*awkwardly raises hand*

[(Anonymous)]

"triggered by the ship" - How is that even a thing?

[(Anonymous)]

made a side blog so that they didn't hurt friends who are triggered by the ship

What. The. Actual. Fuck.

I'd be getting some new friends if mine couldn't accept me, warts and all.

[(Anonymous)]

Sansa/Ramsay is not even remotely popular. There are way more mainstream problematic Sansa ships out there than that one.

[blitzwing]

That's a shame. But I don't think most people would get upset at their friends for shipping one of their NOTPs. Even if they can't squee with you over it, they'll probably stop openly bashing it.

[(Anonymous)]

How would you feel about a friend talking about a ship that squicks you? Say, Stockholm Syndrome Bruce/Tim?

[(Anonymous)]

NA Happens to me all the time and I just don't engage. (Just when there's common ground.)

Since I'm into in tiny fandoms myself, I'm glad for the people I get to know, almost regardless. They don't shit on my quirky ships either. <3!

[(Anonymous)]

I wouldn't give a shit tbh. I have friends who passionately ship things that I can't stand, but it doesn't bother me. I just blacklist the ship tags

[blitzwing]

There are pairings that fill me with rage but I don't feel the need to trash them. I can tolerate talking about them in a neutral, polite way. I'd never pretend to be enthusiastic about them but I also don't need to start shouting "YOUR SHIP SUCKS IT TRIVIALIZES ABUSE!!!" whenever a friend brings them up.

I still might send them a link if I see any really cute art for the ship or buy them merch for it. I don't have to like it to enjoy seeing my friends enjoy it.

[(Anonymous)]

By scrolling past that post like a normal human being, rather than pitching an infantile fit.

You know, the same way I deal with anyone talking about a ship that squicks me.

[(Anonymous)]

I'd think, "Damn, too bad about their bad taste," and carry on with my day.

Why is this such a struggle?

[philstar22]

Not close friends, no. I did have someone not only stop following me and blocking me on Tumblr, but asking me to do the same to them because I ship their NOTP.

[blitzwing]

There are definitely some people that take it waaaay too seriously. That kind of behavior is what I've seen from people who have taken a Serious Moral Stance against the ship.

But I don't know if that's the majority of NOTP'ers or not. There are people that can be a revolted by a ship without making it a moral issue.

[(Anonymous)]

"most" you say. I say be open with it and squee with the one's who like it. Besides, if the haters cut you out over something like that, are they really your friends to begin with?

[(Anonymous)]

It's sort of up to you.

I went the quiet route and refuse to say anything shipping related because I love the fandom NOTPs and loathe the fandom OTP. But it is stressful and it's slowly killed my love for the fandom.

So if I had to do it over again I'd probably just go ahead and be honest right from the start. I want to be honest, but I feel like I'll 'lose' my friends, but if they're only friends with the fake no-shipping version of me then they're kinda fake friends, aren't they?

But at this point I'm not sure if I care enough to try and come clean instead of just slow-fading from fandom.

[diet_poison]

Most ships that are a known quantity in fandom have a sub-fandom for itself - including those that are widely disliked, because that means there are people who ship it in the first place for the naysayers to object to. If you feel like you can't mention to your friends that you like the ship (which is a shame) you should be able to find a fandom for it somewhere so you do have people to talk to about it. You could also ask if they've blacklisted the ship's tags (if you are on Tumblr) so you can post about it more freely (you don't have to tell them why you're asking of course). I would also suggest that if your friends are really intolerant of you shipping something fictional that they don't like, maybe it wouldn't hurt to find some new friends anyway?

Out of curiosity, what is the ship, if you are comfortable sharing?

OP

[(Anonymous)]

It's one of the two in the first anon post.

I first shipped it before I became aware of the hatedom around the ship or that so many of my friends were opposed to it. The few instances where IRL friends became aware I shipped it, some disagreed politely, others were okay with it, and some cut ties with me over it completely with very harsh language. The last ones were bad enough that I ended up leaving a sci-fi club I was part of over the issue.

[(Anonymous)]

consider looking for new friends that aren't so judgemental.

and other people who are fans of the ship and just squee with them.

[(Anonymous)]

As someone who's ships lapis/jasper from SU and bruce/natasha from MCU, I feel your pain OP lol.
You could always just talk about your unpopular ships to other people online who ship them. I'm sure there has to be at least a few.

[(Anonymous)]

The worst thing that happened to Bruce/Natasha was that it became canon.

[cloudtrader]

I have a fandom friend who's main SQUEE!pairing is my absolute NOTP (Batman/Joker) and we're cool. Don't worry too much.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't even Star Wars but shame on all the assholes in the comments who tried to justify treating people like shit because they ship something you don't like. It's fiction. It does not matter if the ship is abusive or not because it's not real. Stories aren't mind control, they don't make people act things out in real life. There have been so many psychological studies on this and all of them come back saying there's no connection. Normal, non-idiots know fiction and reality are different. If you don't then you need to get help. You can disapprove of a ship, you can be squicked by a ship, you can think what the ship stands for is gross. Odds are we've all been there. The adult thing to do is ignore it, block it, scroll past it, whatever the hell, and maybe on the relative privacy of your own blog have a rant if need be. Or maybe I don't know, go offline for a while if you're so in danger of being triggered by someone's story ideas and see a therapist who can help you function better. Shipping Reylo doesn't involve anything illegal or dangerous, and if it did the solution would be to contact cops not enter a harassment campaign. None of you go to the authorities because you know it isn't an emergency, it isn't illegal, and you would end up in a ton of trouble abusing the police that way. You shitheads just want to control everyone around you and make the whole world uniform and babyproof catering to your tastes. Grow the fuck up.