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Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2022-12-26 06:35 pm
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[ SECRET POST #5834 ]


⌈ Secret Post #5834 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 28 secrets from Secret Submission Post #835.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
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Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 01:01 am (UTC)(link)
Making this thread since I was in the middle of writing a comment for yesterday's page. Feel free to reply with your own discussion in regards to a past secret.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 01:07 am (UTC)(link)
In reply to this secret from the Fantastic Mr. Fox secret from yesterday: Hey there, I'm OP. Your comments are very thoughtful and I feel bad now if I really put you on the spot and gave you trouble. I'm just going to say that my defensiveness about the word 'relatability' came mostly from the comments above your own. F!s is not immune to people being snippy and condescending on it, and now that we got trolls back, I've been on guard about it.

You're fine, my guy. I hope you are doing well, and I thank you for engaging in good faith.

SA

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 01:08 am (UTC)(link)
The comment was this one for the record: https://fandomsecrets.dreamwidth.org/2732509.html?thread=1097786077#cmt1097786077
greghousesgf: (Default)

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

[personal profile] greghousesgf 2022-12-27 02:41 am (UTC)(link)
I didn't like that movie either but for reasons that weren't really talked about yesterday.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 02:50 am (UTC)(link)
oh snap, what didn't you like about it?
greghousesgf: (Default)

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

[personal profile] greghousesgf 2022-12-27 03:05 am (UTC)(link)
I didn't like any of the stuff in the movie that wasn't in the book (Ash, etc.) And I'm not one of those people who thinks a movie should always copy the book exactly, it's just that nothing they put in added anything good to the movie. Plus, the "cuss" joke was stupid the first time they used it and they kept repeating it.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) - 2022-12-27 05:55 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 03:46 am (UTC)(link)
I wasn’t around yesterday, but I think you and I probably dislike that movie for many of the same reasons.

I don’t need characters to be like me, but I need them to either resonate somehow emotionally/mentally or be fun to watch. And the characters of this are neither for me.

Wes Anderson usually doesn’t do it for me, but this seemed like it could be different. I usually find George Clooney charming, the visual style was interesting, and I dimly but fondly remembered the book. But the whole thing made uncomfortable instead. It felt like it was supposed to be a relatable, cute and cozy world (with some faults and cracks that are part of The Message)… but that world was fundamentally alien and hostile to someone like me.

I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with the movie and I can definitely appreciate the technical skill, but it also made me quite uncomfortable to watch.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 06:05 am (UTC)(link)
YEAH! "Fundamentally alien and hostile to someone like me" is the perfect way to put it. I thought I was the only one who felt like this in regards to this positively-rated film, so I'm glad to see this comment.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 06:10 am (UTC)(link)
DA/NAYRT

May I ask if you have any reasons as to why Wes Anderson doesn't appeal to you?

Polarizing directors/directors with a following fascinate me, sometimes more than their works do. Wes Anderson is sort of shaping up to be one of those sorts of figures in film for me. LOL

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 07:08 am (UTC)(link)
Ugh, I had a whole comment written that got eaten by DreamWidth, so apologies if this isn’t as well-written.

I’m not sure entirely why he doesn’t appeal to me, but these are the things I think I’ve figured out so far…

He’s very aesthetically focused and I can appreciate that intellectually (“oh, I see that this look clearly took careful consideration and design”) but his specific aesthetic sensibility isn’t at all appealing to me.

His characters don’t resonate with me. I have a hard time empathizing with them. And I also don’t find them fun to watch. They’re often “cold” and “distant” – perhaps implied to be depressed – without portraying the experiences of me or my close friends. I acknowledge that these characters may represent experiences of other depressed (or otherwise low-affect) people. It just doesn’t mean much to me personally.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 04:06 am (UTC)(link)
Get off your high horse. There was nothing snippy or condescending about the other comments. You want snippy and condescending? Here:
Not anyone's fault but your own that you use the word 'relatable' in a way plenty of people don't. Maybe don't use words weirdly and then complain people misunderstand you.

Not OP, but long-comment anon from up-thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 04:47 am (UTC)(link)
You seem like you were offended by something, can you pinpoint what it was? I thought the discussion yesterday and today was pretty chill, but something was clearly irritating enough that you seemingly decided to say something “snippy and condescending” on purpose.

I don’t get it – and of course you’re not obligated to explain – but I’m confused and would be very interested if you did feel like elaborating on the situation.

Re: Not OP, but long-comment anon from up-thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 01:17 pm (UTC)(link)
It does irritate me when people go full "woe is me, people were mean to me" and calling everyone who doesn't wholeheartedly agree with you a troll when that wasn't the case. Like, at all.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 05:45 am (UTC)(link)
Hey, OP, I found the snippy and condescending anon from yesterday's thread!

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 05:49 am (UTC)(link)
Oh my god, yeah lmao!

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 05:48 am (UTC)(link)
Can you rephrase your comment in a way that is not confusing? Thank you in advance.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 01:20 pm (UTC)(link)
OP says "People were snippy and condescending". Nobody was actually snippy and condescending. Someone just didn't understand/agree with OP's incorrect/unusual use of the word relatable. OP is just whiny because people aren't mind readers who can magically guess how OP interprets certain words.

nayrt

(Anonymous) - 2022-12-27 14:34 (UTC) - Expand

Re: nayrt

(Anonymous) - 2022-12-27 14:50 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 09:41 am (UTC)(link)
Why do you feel the need to be a dick? They weren’t on their high horse.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 01:12 pm (UTC)(link)
They were, considering there wasn't anyone being snippy and/or condescending yesterday.

Re: Old comments/secrets thread

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 09:29 am (UTC)(link)
This was a very sweet and thoughtful response!

I completely understand! The timing of my response didn’t help at all.

I hope you’re doing well too!

Re: OP of Hawkeye's Kate Bishop 'Not Like Other Girls' Secret

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 03:05 am (UTC)(link)
https://fandomsecrets.dreamwidth.org/2725695.html?thread=1097044287#cmt1097044287

So I found it a bit presumptive of some comments to conclude that what I thought of my former friend and the comment thread in general to be shallow in some way?

I don't think I need to tell the nitty gritty details of the friendship that I lost to try to get anyone to understand that my friend was a shitty friend/not as woke as she let off because of the way she consumed media.

Of course, there was more to the story than just my friend stans Kate Bishop but kept pitting her against other female characters needlessly, but I was just thinking like, "yeah those small things that sorta bothered me make a little bit more sense now lol".

My friendship did not end because of the way my former friend consumed media/due to who they stanned. This friendship spanned a lot of years and multiple fandoms. A lot of personal things happened and as I took a break from the friendship, I ruminated on some stuff that I used to brush aside and realized that maybe some of them were red flags. The whole Hawkeye/Kate Bishop stanning is a part of something bigger. One example, realizing how this friend and I would have small friend groups that usually end up in a trio and after so many weeks/months of the dynamic this friend of mine usually had a falling out with the third wheel. This feeling of a need to pit people against each other. If not, me needing to choose who is a better friend to me but just as many times I felt like I had to prove that I was worthy of this friend's attention.
And there are a lot of other things that play into my friendship but again, a lot of it is actually not fandom related. It's just some things in fandom/friend circles stuff, I began to notice patterns.
Also, I was not a perfect friend. And I'm not trying to claim that I was. I have my shortcomings as a human being, but I don't think I need to humble myself every time I want to be pissed off at someone for being shitty to me.

If you're feeling called out or something by a friend, I don't think I'm that friend. I just wanted to vent into the void. I swear, I'm not shading said former friend, hoping they read that secret to feel like shit. I don't even know if my former friend visits F!S.

Re: OP of Hawkeye's Kate Bishop 'Not Like Other Girls' Secret

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 03:49 am (UTC)(link)
I get it. At the time, I thought a lot of comments were reading in things that I didn’t think were implied by your secret.

I think it’s easy for that to happen here, where people are explaining themselves pretty briefly and the situation is actually complex.

Re: OP of Hawkeye's Kate Bishop 'Not Like Other Girls' Secret

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 04:46 am (UTC)(link)
I feel where you're coming from and I totally agree, although I would also say that most of the comments in the thread weren't really doing any of that IMO.

Re: OP of Hawkeye's Kate Bishop 'Not Like Other Girls' Secret

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 06:05 am (UTC)(link)
OP
Agreed that majority of the comments weren't that! And I'm sorry if I said or implied that. Toward the end of the thread a few comments came off a bit judgey so I think I was feeling defensive.

Re: OP of Hawkeye's Kate Bishop 'Not Like Other Girls' Secret

(Anonymous) 2022-12-27 06:47 am (UTC)(link)
That's totally fair!
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