fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2050 ]

[ SECRET POST #2050 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2050 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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So, uh, I tried to masturbate for the first time last night (18 is probably old for this...), and I was not exactly successful. First question: is it normal to be, like, really tight? One finger was not a problem, but I tried slipping a second in, and it was quite uncomfortable.

And second, does anyone have any advice for how to do the whole masturbation process properly? I'm ridiculously noob-ish at this. :P

checking anon for the fifth time, oh my god.

I've troubles slipping in a second finger as well, given that you're a virgin I think it's pretty normal :)

Well uh most of the time I don't even use a finger to penetrate myself but just go for rubbing my clit but if I do I need a second hand to rub my clit, I never managed the one hand thing to my satisfaction ;)

Er, don't try to penetrate yourself if you haven't masturbated before. Focus on your clit and leave your vagina for later.

And it's perfectly normal to be tight when you're young, especially if you're a virgin.

That's because you didn't say the magic words, 'Open sesame', before penetrating yourself.

Did you allow yourself to be worked up that you were wet enough or did you just go to town dry? Because not allowing yourself to get wet first can end up hurting.

Also, maybe you should start off slow and focus on the clit and only on the clit before you try to fingerfuck yourself. Work up to it.

Yeah, it's normal, I've been doing it for years and I can't do two fingers most of the time if I'm not really really wet.
The magic is in the clit!

And, well, there isn't a "right" way to do it xD Do what feels good!
For what's worth, I start watching porn until I'm wet, and then whatever feels good that day: rubbing clit, one finger in... toothbrush (evidently clean and evidently not the brush part xD) I have a dildo but it's too big so I don't really use it.

It's normal. Try getting yourself really turned on - use whatever kind of porn does it for you, then get started. Make sure there's enough lubrication, either the natural discharge kind or just buy lube (personally I don't like using lube on my vag while masturbating but I really need to get the juices flowing before touching anything). Focus on the clit and the area around it and underneath it. Be aware that a lot of women don't get anything out of vaginal fingering at all - I don't.

Heh, I only started masturbating when I was 17, don't worry about it. As somebody with girl parts who's still a virgin, I frequently accidentally hurt myself if I try two fingers too quickly (it's a nail thing). In my experience, even if penetration sounds like something that would get you off, you have to wait until you're really, really turned on to try more than one finger, and a lot of times even with one, it feels more weird than hot.

My advice would be, make absolutely certain you know where your clitoris is. And this probably seems like a no brainer, but it's a lot easier to start touching yourself when you're already turned on than to try to turn yourself on by touching yourself (at least, for me).

....I can probably think of some other stuff, if this is helpful?

It is helpful! If you think of anything else, I'd love to hear it, I'm just trying to figure things out over here. ;)

:) So as far as clit stimulation, try various directions/speeds to figure out which one works for you (particularly as it may change from time to time). You might want to start out only rubbing the hood and not the actual clit underneath, depending on how sensitive you are. I'd also say, see if you have other particularly erogenous zones outside the genitals- I knew a girl whose thighs were really sensitive, which doesn't do much for me, but I do like having my boobs touched.

Tightness is absolutely normal! Being a virgin, I had to prepare myself to use a menstrual cup, and I basically took a month of first stretching myself with one finger by pushing it in different directions, and then two fingers in different directions and scissoring before I could manage, and then I still experienced slight discomfort using my cup for the first while. Then, despite using a cup for years, when I eventually bought a vibrator I still experienced slight discomfort from stretching when I first used it!

In my experience, the best way to stretch out your vagina if you want to is just to keep going at it, enough to experience slight discomfort but not enough to hurt. Using lube or getting yourself really aroused beforehand can help. However, this is not necessarily going to get you off! Just make it easier for you to see if you can find a stimulate your g-spot.

I started masturbating when I was 19/20 myself, so don't feel bad about it! I, for one, never cared much for penetration until I bought my vibe, and I still rarely manage to orgasm from internal stimulation alone. However, everybody is different! But I recommend experimenting more with your clitoris.

I also recommend trying porn. I can only get off with visual porn generally, so you should see if anything helps you along: written porn, drawn porn, pornographic flash games, real people porn... find what works for you and go with it!

1.) 18 is not "too old." Don't be ashamed at your lack of knowledge regarding mastubation.

2.) It is normal to be tight. Even if you have been having penatrative sex, if it's been a while you might be very tight. And, it sounds like this is your first time experiencing penetration, so expect tightness until you start practicing more and stretching yourself. The more aroused (and wet) you are, the easier it is to put more that one finger in.

3.) I was pretty old too when I learned a masturbation technique that worked for me. All I knew of sex and masturbation was "insert something into the vagina." No. For many, many women it's clitoral stimulation that will be the great contributor to getting off. Try just rubbing your clit for a while without penatration and see if that gets you off.

4.) Take time to "explore" and figure out what really feels good to you. Watch, read, or fantasize about something that really turns you on and have fun!

I've found that if I use my fingers for penetration during masturbation, I struggle to get in more than one finger. However, if I use a dildo, I have no problem with something bigger than one finger. I really have no idea why that is, but I think it might have to do with just tensing up and from the angle and everything. I pretty much just prefer to do clitoral stimulation when I'm getting myself off anyway though.

It could also be that two fingers are kind of blunt, rather than the smooth small-to-large gradation of a dildo.

Just going to become more and more confused about how so many people seem to be able to get a finger inside with no problem.

I mean, I'm a virgin, but I've been masturbating for six years and getting even the tip of a finger in still makes me feel incredibly nauseated ._.

Even turned on? Maybe it's a tensing up thinking / thinking about it too hard, but I don't know.

Yeah, even turned on.... I guess it could be, I've sort of stopped trying at this point. It feels so awful that I can't really work up the nerve anymore.

Have you ever talked to a gynecologist about this? While I imagine the size and stretchiness of vaginas varies widely, I don't think it's 'normal' to experience significant pain (especially not enough to induce nausea!) at even the smallest amount of vaginal penetration.

You could potentially have vaginismus, or possibly a hymen that covers more of your vaginal entrance than is typical. I'm not an expert on this or anything, but if you are genuinely curious about penetration, I would definitely consult a gynecologist if you can!

No, I've honestly never even been to a gynecologist. I mean, I guess I didn't think it was abnormal enough to warrant a doctor.

I've gotten my finger in up to like... the second knuckle, but I've only managed that once and the pain was kind of taking my breath away and it didn't seem worth it at all.

So... I'm guessing I should find a gynecologist, huh? >

If you have the means to do so, yeah, it's a good idea!

I do, and I will. Thank you, dear anon~ <3

Yeah, I only started masturbating recently, anon (I'm 20). Yeah, seconding everyone else - rubbing your clit is the best way IMO.

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[ SECRET POST #2050 ]

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