Case (
case) wrote in
fandomsecrets2012-09-29 03:17 pm
[ SECRET POST #2097 ]
⌈ Secret Post #2097 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
01.

__________________________________________________
02.

__________________________________________________
03.

__________________________________________________
04.

__________________________________________________
05.

__________________________________________________
06.

__________________________________________________
07.

__________________________________________________
08.

__________________________________________________
09.

__________________________________________________
10.

__________________________________________________
11.

__________________________________________________
12.

__________________________________________________
13.

__________________________________________________
14.

__________________________________________________
15.

__________________________________________________
16.

__________________________________________________
17.

__________________________________________________
18.

__________________________________________________
19.

__________________________________________________
20.

__________________________________________________
Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 06 pages, 129 secrets from Secret Submission Post #300.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

NF
(Anonymous) 2012-09-30 12:12 am (UTC)(link)Though it's been a mutual disconnect on both sides. When you get married you get obsessed with your significant other, and everyone else has to be appointments to even see you. And if you're single, that makes it even harder because no one likes being a third wheel.
Once you have a baby your life is over. The part of you that used to exist is now over, that part of the book is SHUT. Things will never be the same. You die when your child is born and everything you ever were is dedicated to that child. There's no room there for a fun-loving, single, kid-at-heart.
I don't care how much you seem to think you can juggle everything. You can't.
Re: NF
(Anonymous) 2012-09-30 02:04 am (UTC)(link)I made friends with my friends' S.O., and I was the favorite 'aunt' - despite being someone who's notorious for not liking kids. The only thing that broke up our friendship was when the moved out of state. Even then, when they came back 'home' to visit, they always made time to see me, even if it was a couple of hours, and I didn't care if the kids came along, because they were well-behaved, and generally sweet kids - and I was still the favorite 'aunt'.
Re: NF
(Anonymous) 2012-09-30 11:11 pm (UTC)(link)That must make you feel SO special and desired.
Re: NF
(Anonymous) 2012-09-30 02:22 am (UTC)(link)I normally wouldn't be so harsh, but if the friend kept pushing to re-connect our relationship...I might say something nasty just to cut ties for good. I also have to wonder if your friend has a direct problem with your spouse, and just didn't want to be overly vocal about it. I don't think your friend is a terrible person, and neither are you for choosing a new lifestyle. Sucks it ended that way, but you never know. Maybe in a few years when you've adjusted more/your kids' older, you might run into each other again and pick things up, or end them in a neater way.
Re: NF
(Anonymous) 2012-09-30 03:02 am (UTC)(link)B) What the fuck is wrong with your married friends?
I am married. I have married friends. We all didn't suddenly change into completely different people when we got married. We still hang out together and with our single friends; we still do a lot of the same things. None of us became "obsessed" with our spouses to the extent that we could no longer go out with our friends and have a good time. Additionally, I don't have a child, but I have friends who do. And you know what? They get sitters, and they come out and they have a good time.
There are two possibilities as far as goes your life. Either your friends are completely fucking ridiculous, or you are a small, petty, jealous person who can't stand the fact that you aren't the guiding light and single most important aspect of your married friends' lives.
Re: NF
(Anonymous) 2012-09-30 05:35 am (UTC)(link)+1
(Anonymous) 2012-09-30 09:24 pm (UTC)(link)Re: NF
(Anonymous) 2012-09-30 11:10 pm (UTC)(link)I'm not "bitter" as people probably think, I'm completely comfortable and happy being "alone" (abloo bloo bloo~) I just think it's ridiculous that I need to be penciled in if I want to see either of them. And actually, I can't even hang out with the male anymore.
Re: NF
(Anonymous) 2012-09-30 03:07 am (UTC)(link)Hey, you know what? Maybe people would still want to spend time with you if you weren't such a whiny brat about the fact that they have other important things in their lives besides you. Maybe they wouldn't abandon you if you didn't bring them down. Maybe they wouldn't seem to "change" if you were more understanding and didn't expect them to always mold their lives to suit your purposes.
Maybe the secret could have been written about you. Because maybe you're a self-pitying loser who expects other people to work toward making you feel good about yourself.
Re: NF
Details?
When you get married you get obsessed with your significant other
lol, not if it's a healthy marriage.
and everyone else has to be appointments to even see you.
Dramatic much...?
Once you have a baby your life is over. The part of you that used to exist is now over, that part of the book is SHUT. Things will never be the same. You die when your child is born and everything you ever were is dedicated to that child. There's no room there for a fun-loving, single, kid-at-heart.
This whole paragraph is a crock of shit.
I don't care how much you seem to think you can juggle everything. You can't.
Except some people can, and do. Honestly, you sound mad that one of your friends made some changes in their life and rearranged their priorities a little bit. Now it would be one thing if they totally cut you off without warning or reason, which may or may not be connected to other changes in their life, but in many cases like this it just involves them maybe not making you quite as important time-wise as you were before, but still valuing you as a friend.
Fact is, many people want to seek out a significant other to spend their life with. Many of those people want to have a family. For those who don't, there's nothing wrong with that decision, but if you want to hold back your friends from finding what will make them happy just so you can all live the single life together even though that isn't really what they want out of life, then you are being selfish.
If it really bothers you that much, maybe you should seek out other single and/or childfree people and form friendships with them.
Re: NF