[ SECRET POST #2190 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2190 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 064 secrets from Secret Submission Post #313.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 2 3 4 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

As I childfree person, I acknowledge there are a lot of hateful, bitter people in he online childfree community. All I can say we are not all a hivemind, and we do not all hate people who choose to have kids.

I am not fond of kids, I'll admit to that, but whether someone else chooses to have hem or not is not my business.

However, please do not downplay the societal pressures on childfree people to reproduce (and yes, those differ depending on the region you live in, then can go from mild to severe, but they're there).

The assumption that you'll change your mind, the implication that you're selfish, or hat you're 'broken' as a woman if you don't like kids is always there. And this is in fact why a lot of childfree people react so bitterly: they've heard this shit so many times before.

Just this month I did a job interview for a company that actively discriminated against childless/childfree people in regards to holiday/free time.

The thing is you don't really see these things unless you're childfree yourself, especially once you get to a certain age. (I'm 32 now, and while the active questioning about kids has lessened, the instances where I'm just considered an outsider have increased).

So tl,dr: While you're right about some bitter childfree folk, please don't pretend prejudice against and pestering/bingo-ing of chldfree folk isn't a real thing.

[(Anonymous)]

You've never heard of the adage "treat yourself like a close friend - would YOU let anyone degrade your close friend or call them ugly or let them tear themselves down"?

Re: crafty people!

[cassandraoftroy]

I knit a little (have made some hats, and almost finished a second pair of socks), sew (I've made some garb for RenFaires/LARPs), make chainmaille (though I haven't in a while, as it's expensive)... Does drawing count? Writing? Baking? Origami? There may be others... I've made cheese once or twice...

[(Anonymous)]

But he's a special snowflake. Everyone must love him. He's Legolas' Dad. You have to love Legolas' Dad.

[(Anonymous)]

I totally feel you. I was unpleasantly reminded very soon after coming back that my parents have a... tense marriage, shall we say. I would very much like to go back home asap.

Re: New Year's Resolutions!

[(Anonymous)]

Have you never had a Day of Masturbation before? It's terribly good fun! You get a bit tender after a while but you just need to lubricate and carry on regardless... and then you just stop noticing it :)

[(Anonymous)]

Maybe it's just me, but I've NEVER identified myself with any attractive or sexually confident women in fanfiction. I have a LOT of trouble imagining fantasies involving myself receiving sex, because I don't believe any of the stars of my fantasies would be interested in me sexually. I'm not in OP's situation (I don't particularly like my body, but I'm not REVOLTED by it), but this just strikes me as strange that OP couldn't distance their own body from that of a sexually confident character. We're already inundated with plenty of those in the media - is it really that hard to imagine?

But OP, you can't get a little lost in how the CHARACTERS feel for each other? Again, I don't imagine myself as a participant in the act, more like a voyeur I guess?

[(Anonymous)]

It just seems kind of sad and unfair that the only body/face I'll ever have is an ugly one. Oh well, I love escaping into the world of fic so I'm glad I live in a day and age where it's widely available. It wasn't when I was younger which led to many lonely moments with just me and my fantasies.

Re: New Year's Resolutions!

[(Anonymous)]

+1

I still think of 200 Cigarettes every year and the bit about how the sexual success of your New Year's Eve determines the sexual success of your new year. ^_^ Given that I'm currently at home by myself sick, this does not bode well.

Re: Got my meds

[30_rock_office]

You will be so glad you did! :)

[(Anonymous)]

Beautiful secret. ♥

[(Anonymous)]

Does this sound a little fucked up? Yes. But is it allowing you to function in a way that is not actively hurting yourself? You bet. It's okay, all of us have our weird coping mechanisms. I imagine myself as just a body, without much of a face (or a different face - I really, REALLY hate my nose and face shape), and tell myself that white people are stupid and haven't caught on to the fact that a big booty and thighs and love handles are sexy. Yay for racial stereotyping? (Even though black men are the only ones that try to pick me up in bars?)

[(Anonymous)]

Considering that Radagast was played by the same man who played the 7th Doctor, I could see how this could be a working theory.

[(Anonymous)]

Eh, I've never had a problem with it, but then I try to keep the two separate. If there's any reason to mention the kids, then I will (I gtg, school pick up time'/ 'bbl, the baby just woke') and I'll answer questions if asked but that's it.

Make it clear you're a fan who happens to be a mom instead of a mom who's a fan - if that makes any sense.

Also *big hugs* those first months can be absolute hell. But it does get better. All I remember of my eldest's first 4 months is crying from a lack of sleep.

[(Anonymous)]

Internalizing external pressures can cause a variety of serious disorders, hence the worry. OP is perfectly within her right to like whatever she wants for whatever reason, and you're perfectly correct that people need to not be bigoted about other people's entertainment preferences. But for her own sake, it might be beneficial for her to talk to a professional about this issue because maybe she can learn how to be okay with her body and cope with the gross images of "perfection" society forces on women. Nobody is saying it's easy, but if the problem comes from society, then maybe she can learn to direct the disgust at society rather than at herself.

[creambun]

I'm ambivalent to Chidori, but I don't really understand the amount of vitriol Yukari gets either. Concerning the Answer, I could see someone's point on that (though I don't hold it against her with everything that happened) but almost everyone I know seems to hate it in the main game alone :/ For me, at least, I saw her as someone who was nice, but snarky and used to finding her own way to get things done.

I think the only thing that slightly irritated me was when she didn't apologize for the love hotel slap, but no big deal.

Re: New Year's Resolutions!

[(Anonymous)]

This may be going completely in the wrong direction with this, but it reminds me of Dan Savage's advice to young people about (paraphrase) "Stop focusing on getting your 17-year-old self laid and focus on getting your 20-year-old self laid, because people who spend their lives persuing sex are boring, but people who spend their lives doing interesting shit are the kinds of people others want to have sex with."

[(Anonymous)]

So this.

I mean, I'm not conventionally attractive in the sense that I'm plus-sized. But I dress well, have a way with make-up and often actually like what I see in the mirror.

After high school, which I'm sure is horrible for most people, I had no trouble getting laid (and I didn't even have to lower my standards, I always got the guys I wanted. Granted, there were only 3, but I'll take quality over quantity.)

Sure, obviously I'd love a super fit body, but I don't hate myself for not having it.

I like slash, because well, I like guys and two guys are better than one. Also buttsex turns me on, and there's plenty of that in slash.

[(Anonymous)]

People talk to themselves all the time. Why is that so strange?

[chardmonster]

Adulthood!

[(Anonymous)]

I think it sounds rather adorable, actually <3

[(Anonymous)]

NAYRT, but Stargate fandom has a fair number of grandmoms from what I see. :) Perhaps because the main characters are not all youngsters themselves?

[(Anonymous)]

he's legolas' dad?!

...it all makes sense now

[(Anonymous)]

I'll join!

Re: New Year's Resolutions!

[(Anonymous)]

awww, poor anon! Hope you feel better soon and that it's not a bad omen!