[ SECRET POST #2192 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2192 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Tales of the Abyss]


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[Merlin, RPS]


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[Lilo & Stitch]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 032 secrets from Secret Submission Post #313.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

10. http://i.imgur.com/Z8CVE.png

[darth_eldritch]

LOL!!!!!!

[dethtoll]

heh "air" i see what you did there

[mekkio]

"A robe flapper?"

Good lord, I just started laughing and I ended up in a coughing fit. Ow, my lungs.

[(Anonymous)]

Hey, now that you mention it...
Elves probably fart rainbows and glitter. If they don't, they strike me as sticklers for personal hygiene, or dirt doesn't stick to their skin for too long.

Saruman, maybe. Secretly. His would be the vicious ones, the ones that choke you and make you tear up before you had time to get away because you did not hear them.

[nan]

This secret is adorable oh my god.

[lunabee34]

*dies laughing*

I imagine hobbits fart all the time. They like to eat and drink too much not to. And same with dwarves. Possibly they have a poor sense of smell. LOL

But elves? When they fart, daisies bloom on the meadows and birds come down from the trees and braid their hair.

[helenadax]

This secret is awesome and I want to read a fic about it.

[(Anonymous)]

Best secret ever omg yes.

[kallanda_lee]

I love you, OP.

I also sort of feel your pain. I often just wonder about actual, practical things in fantasy settings. Like, who's looking after Bilbo's house? What happens in you have to pee in a fight? Why were there no toilet scenes on 24?

I also really enjoy discussing tings like how genetic mutation actually works in the X-men universe etc.

Usually these conversations end with people telling me I'm over-thinking it, and I should just enjoy the story :(

[greenvelvetcake]

ahahaha what? That's hilarious, OP. What exactly put you onto this train of thought?

[forgottenjester]

...great. Now you seriously got me thinking about it. I think elves, hobbits, and dwarves fart. I think they're living and similar enough to us. Blah, blah.

Gandalf and Saruman probably don't. They're Istari, meaning they're chosen Maiar, and Maiar are like spirits. They're just making themselves look like... people. So since they're spirits they don't pass gas. Except, they could probably make it look like they did. I'm not sure why they would want to fool a regular person into thinking they're passing gas but I wouldn't put it past Gandalf to do it.

Then again, I haven't read the books since middle school. Maybe I'm remembering the Maiar wrong.

[(Anonymous)]

Gandalf has probably tried to light his on occasions.

[(Anonymous)]

I would assume, using logic, that if they eat food, and have a digestive tract, then they are entirely capable of farting.

[(Anonymous)]

I love you, OP. Seriously, thank you for making my day via Elf-fart-speculation.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm crying with laughter over this. OP, I'd totally discuss this kind of subject with you or with my friends.

I bet Dwarves fart. They've probably learned from experience to aim away from the forge. On the plus side, they probably while away the long evenings drinking, farting, belching, and telling long stories about poor dwarves who never learned that lesson.

[elaminator]

I'm now hoping OP or someone else will prompt this on The Hobbit kink meme because it just sounds so damned hilarious. SOMEONE DO IT!

[(Anonymous)]

Don't be silly, everyone knows pretty and magical beings don't do things like that. Nor do they go to the bathroom. Or need to brush their teeth.

[(Anonymous)]

First I thought this was a fake secret. Then I thought it was a secret making fun of Ringers. Then I realized it was a real secret from someone genuinely interested & curious & now I think I love you. I also love the comments this secret has generated. Hil-fucking-arious.

[cakemage]

I love this secret and I love this thread, too. "Robe-flapper" is just priceless!

[sochitelya]

Best secret ever.

Also, you remind me of my friend, who enjoys inserting bodily functions into our RPs. Because gods know there's nothing I like better than RPing an ancient god-spirit answering the question, 'But do you poop?'

[(Anonymous)]

I bet dwarves have Misha-Collins-on-a-plane farts. The kind that literally render people unconscious. Except instead of being embarrassed, they'd claim bragging rights and have contests.

Gimli: *Watches one of his kinsmen knock an Oliphaunt senseless with his deadly Khazâdian flatulence* THAT STILL ONLY COUNTS AS ONE!

[intrigueing]

This is quite literally the single greatest secret I have ever seen on this site in my life. I burst out laughing irl at your ever-so-classy pun in the s!b :D And I right-click + saved the image, because it's that awesome ;)

[(Anonymous)]

This is officially the best thread in the history of Fandom Secrets.

[(Anonymous)]

Thanks to the image choice I read this secret in Saruman's voice...