[ SECRET POST #2359 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2359 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 066 secrets from Secret Submission Post #336.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

Mom, it's 2013, and we've had a computer with internet since 1997. I know this because I remember buying it with you. Don't you think it's time to, I don't know, LEARN HOW IT WORKS?! Stop asking me how to open new tabs, stop asking me "where the picture went," stop asking me how to close a window, stop asking me to google things for you, stop asking me to "pull it up on your magic box," stop calling me at school to ask how to open a word document. Learn cut and paste on your own. Learn how to go through your history for a link you want. Learn how to bookmark. Learn how to use a touch-pad.

Mom, stop getting mad when I don't know how to help you. You know what I do when I can't fix something? I google the fucking thing I don't have the answer to and then I do what it tells me! Stop acting high and mighty when I say I don't know how something works. Stop acting high and mighty when I don't know how to fix something. You don't know how to do it either, so stop being so fucking smug when I admit defeat. I'm not a technology expert just because I can name three different search engines.

Mom, I know you just bought an iphone 4, but please, LEARN HOW TO USE IT! Learn how to put in your passcode! Stop asking me how to refresh pages. Stop asking me "where the 'thing' went." Stop asking me how to buy apps. Stop asking me how to use apps. Stop asking me how to change volume. Stop asking me how to change your ringtone. Stop yelling at the GPS when it recalculates.

Mom, you keep saying technology "scare" you because you don't know how to use, but if you think it's going away, you're a fucking moron. It's only going to get more and more common and more and more streamlined. If you can't handle a phone and computer now, what the fuck are you going to do with technology twenty, thirty, forty, or even fifty years from now?!

...Oh yeah, probably call me and ask what you're supposed to do.

FUCK YOU MOM

[chardmonster]

GOD I HATE HOW YOU ASK ME FOR HELP, PERSON WHO GAVE BIRTH TO AND RAISED ME

(frozen comment) Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[world_eater]

Aaaand the douchebag's in.

(frozen comment) Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[chardmonster]

It's the tone that looks bad. I get being annoyed. I was the family tech person before I moved out and my sister moved in.

But there's this tone of how dare my parent ask for help that is painfully teenager.

(frozen comment) Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[(Anonymous)]

Unfortunately.

Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[(Anonymous)]

Think something about fish and teaching someone how to fish and all that kind of thing goes here. And also something about how, you know, there's nothing unnatural or wrong about sometimes getting annoyed with your parents even if you totally love them, and seriously, this is just kind of a strange reaction to have. It's okay to have feelings and I'm not a big fan of "YOUR FEELINGS ARE ILLEGITIMATE" a lot of the time.

Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[deadtree]

umm I'm gonna have to agree with you here, this absolutely reeks of a teenager who is so put upon to give simple advice to the person who does EVERY FUCKING THING for them that they have to cry about it on the internet.

Yes it's irritating when people ask you to do the same thing over and over and over, but it's your mom and if this is your biggest problem with her you've got it pretty fantastic.

Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[mekkio]

I get that you've never been in this situation. Because let me tell you, it gets old quickly.

Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[(Anonymous)]

out of curiosity, what makes you think anon's tone is so hateful?

i read it twice and all i'm seeing is a lot of exasperation and frustration, which tbh, "how do i open a new tab" is not a thing to be continually baffled by forever unless she's got dementia

after years of tech support for my grandma, i can totally relate, but i don't see any hate

Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[sachiko_san]

ARGH, NO ONE FUCKING CARES.

Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[(Anonymous)]

I still cannot figure out why half the people on this comm take you so fucking seriously. It's like everything you say amounts to, "I'm the dick who ran over your grandmother and I'm proud of it," and I just don't get it.

Maybe I've been on the internet too long.

Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[(Anonymous)]

This calls for an Out at Home panel:

Re: FUCK YOU MOM

[(Anonymous)]

Mmm...What I got out of this was more...being really tired, and sick of having to constantly reteach their mother how to do the same things over and over again because their mother, for whatever reason, refuses to learn how to do it...to the point of bugging them at places where that can actually get you into trouble.

I'll grant you, they didn't really word things well - it's a rant, that tends to happen - but...I can really see where they're coming from it's been an on going thing for a long time. My mother is a lot like this and when she's gotten a virus for the third time in a row from a website I've told her is giving it to her, can't be bothered to learn to run her virus scan *and* turns around acts smug when I admit to not knowing something? Yeah, I rant a bit too. Thankfully she doesn't call me to bother me about it when she knows I'm going to be in class, but...well. It can definitely build up after a while.

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[mekkio]

Did I write this in my sleep?

RANT START!!!!!/
And my mom has no, "But it's my generation thing" excuse because my dad who is only one year younger than her took to computers like a duck to water.

How can someone who uses the computer EVERY SINGLE DAY not pick up on how to use one properly? It must be a family thing because her mother, my grandmother, lived in NYC for thirty years but never learned English. She just relied on her kids to translate everything to Spanish for her. How can you not pick up the language after thirty years? My grandmother's entire side of the family is like that. Just a whole pile of Rodriguezes relying on the next generation to do things that they should really know how to do. Jesus. /END RANT!!!!!

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

This is exactly what I mean! My Mom uses a computer every day for her job with little to no issue, but as soon as she wants to check her email, six pop up windows and three alarm bells go off because she "didn't know" what she clicked. She always pulls that "my generation" shit with me too. Ok, I was born in 1993, but I know how to use a typewriter and call someone on a rotary phone and my church had a TV with rabbit ears that I had no trouble with once I tried it out on my own a bit. If I used the generational argument, I shouldn't be able to do any of those things. Like, what the hell is my Mom going to do when I move out after college?

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

not OP

For me its not that they dont know that bothers me, its that they dont even TRY to know because they assume you'll be there to help them, forever. I can teach my mother how to download something 5 times in a row, 5 days in a row, and it just goes in one ear and out the other because she doesnt think its important, since I'm there to help anyway!!

Before anybody cries about how I'm a horrible child, any parent that does this to their child is also a horrible parent, because doing everything for someone and letting them take others' assistance for granted is a shitty way of teaching them to do anything for themselves especially if it's something as necessary in daily life as basic computer functions

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

That sounds massively annoying but I wonder if your mom lacks the capacity to learn how to do those things if she's still asking how to do them after all those years. Or maybe the ways you or others have taught her wasn't in a way she could understand and retain. Some people just clash with technology and if she's saying it scares her, that's a pretty big indicator that she's one of those people.

Whatever the case, I hope you feel better soon and that venting helps keep the peace between you.

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

That sounds massively annoying but I wonder if your mom lacks the capacity to learn how to do those things if she's still asking how to do them after all those years.

I've become convinced that there really is some kind of learning/cognitive issue behind people who never seem to be able to learn to use computers and other gadgets. Blaming a generation gap is total BS. My grandparents got their first home computer sometime in the early 90s - by which point they were both over 70 - and learned to use it just fine. When my parents were teenagers, computers ran on punch cards, but they've never had a hard time keeping up with technology as things have changed. They're probably more tech savvy than I am. I'm willing to believe some people naturally have a hard time grasping technology, but it has nothing to do with when you were born.

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[byonicluna]

This is going to net you sooo much grief from her, but just stop helping her. She won't learn unless she absolutely has to, and she won't have to as long as she has you on beck and call. (Calling you at school for what sounds like a non-emergency sounds like some boundary-breaking thing.)

From your post, I get the impression that she calls you not because she absolutely can't learn how to use computers, but because she wants your attention.

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

You complain she doesn't know how to use them and that you're the one who always has to tell her what to do over and over again. Sounds like a problem with the teacher.

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

THIS. Having knowledge and being able to transfer knowledge are two entirely different skills.

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

I don't know, most of what they're talking about really just does not sound that complicated at all. It sounds so basic that their mother just must not be paying attention to anything they show her at all, or have established some kind of habitual routine of asking for help.

That happens with some frequency, too.

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

Maybe you can suggest/tell her to go to - idk if your library does it, but mine has free introduction to technology courses once a week? Tends to be a mixed group, maybe something in your area? Then she can have a "certificate" that says she's qualified in the basics of computer and hopefully her smug over that will get her to stop wasting your time?


Or everytime she asks you reply with "i don't know" "dunno" etc etc so she has to give up and work it out herself.

:C sucks.

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[akacat]

Get this: my mom, in her 70s and rather math and science phobic, never needs help with her computer. She can do stuff in Word that baffles me. (I'm a professional code monkey.) And she's only about a half-step behind the average search-engine savvy research librarian in getting the Internet to cough up whatever she wants to know.

My dad has worked with computers since the 60s. He's used pretty much every kind of mainframe and personal computer created between the mid-50s and 2005 in the free world, including several models of Cray back when that was hot shit. He uses both Linux and Windows. He's the one that calls every time his PC does something "weird"!

Re: Learn Computers!!!

[(Anonymous)]

I understand your pain so very well.
But add to that a language barrier and grandma as well.

Try not to teach them specific tasks (ex. open a tab) as much as the very basics (ex. go over the menu bar - at least they can read that). It's helped with me.

Also, if they understand English and are on an English-based system, teach them where the help is.