fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2273 ]

[ SECRET POST #2273 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2273 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 05 pages, 117 secrets from Secret Submission Post #325.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ], [ 1 2 3 - trolls ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Do you think telling people to always listen to "no" ignores the existence of erotic resistance to sex and makes it unerotic? I mean, if they were going to rape someone, they wouldn't be asking anyway...

http://tinyurl.com/b9w9enl

Just something to think about.

Here’s one that will work, as opposed to this drivel: Teach women to not put themselves in positions where men have the opportunity to rape them.

How about fuck you? Teach men no to fucking rape, and teach society that rape is NEVER the fault of the victim.

There are always going to be rapists.

And? Your point is?

Re: "Erotic resistance"

(Anonymous) - 2013-03-24 20:59 (UTC) - Expand

Re: "Erotic resistance"

tabaqui - 2013-03-24 21:03 (UTC) - Expand

Re: "Erotic resistance"

(Anonymous) - 2013-03-24 21:07 (UTC) - Expand

Re: "Erotic resistance"

(Anonymous) - 2013-03-24 21:11 (UTC) - Expand

Re: "Erotic resistance"

insanenoodlyguy - 2013-03-25 07:58 (UTC) - Expand

Re: "Erotic resistance"

(Anonymous) - 2013-03-24 21:11 (UTC) - Expand

Re: "Erotic resistance"

inkdust - 2013-03-24 23:17 (UTC) - Expand

That doesn't mean the onus isn't on men to NOT FUCKING RAPE.

Just like there will always be theives and murders, but the focus should be on the perpetrator you dumb fuck. They're the ones doing wrong

nayrt
While this is true, I feel that it should be pointed out that going to a party with a lot of strange men and getting blackout drunk is to rape as walking down a dark alley in a bad part of town waving fistfuls of expensive jewelery in the air is to being mugged. Yes, it's the mugger's fault that they mugged you, but you did make their "job" easier by your carelessness. Teaching women to have a defensive mindset, to fight back, and to be cautious around men is not a magic potion to end rape forever, but it can help them defend themselves.

IMO, there isn't a problem with teaching tactics to hopefully prevent rape - the problem is putting the entire onus on the (female) victim rather than on the (male) rapist. (And furthermore, assuming all victims are women and women are the only people who need to be "taught" how to protect themselves ignores the existence of male victims and female rapists.)

The idea of it is fine, it's the execution. People who talk about what women should do to protect themselves generally come with the mindset that rapists are rapists and there's nothing anybody can do to change that, and they generally end up telling women these things after she's been raped, like it's all her fault and she should've known better, when even if she did, it's not helping her one damn bit now, and is likely just going to make her feel more guilty and more unwilling to come forward and report it.

Re: "Erotic resistance"

(Anonymous) - 2013-03-24 21:40 (UTC) - Expand

Yeah, but even if you accept this logic (which I don't), I've known people who were mugged when they were by themselves at night and literally not a single person responded with "BUT THAT MUGGER JUST COULDN'T RESIST MUGGING YOU. HOW WAS HE SUPPOSED TO STOP HIMSELF" because everyone knows that stealing is wrong. We are taught from childhood that stealing is wrong. When you see an unlocked car with the keys still in, you still know that taking it would be stealing. You won't find many people who disagree with this.

If you compare the unlocked car with a passed-out drunk girl at a party, suddenly there's DEBATE about why it's rape, and why it's wrong. That's why this argument is such a straw man.

So rather than try to ensure that no one gets raped, try to ensure that someone else gets raped.

I think you've beautifully summed up my problem with this entire argument.

Ahaha you're bad at this.

That's a completely foolproof solution. Just ask Kelly Dodson (sister of Antoine).

"positions where men have the opportunity to rape them." You mean, women shouldn't go anywhere men might go? I have to spend the rest of my short miserable life in a concrete bunker pointing a loaded gun at a blast door? Because that's what you're suggesting. I have male co-workers. I have male friends. Many of my neighbors are men. Some of my roommates have been men. All my professors this semester are men. Avoiding slightly under half the human race is difficult. All men, scratch that, all people, are potential rapists and potential rape victims. The person ultimately responsible for a rape isn't the victim, whether that's a kid, or an old woman, or a young man, or a hot girl with a come-hither smile wearing a g-string and nothing else. The person responsible for the rape is the rapist, not the victim.

They are erotically resisting me without my consent they are violating me.

I am sick and tired of being a dubdomme.

Just something to think about.

This was so beautifully condescending I almost teared up.

I skimmed your link. If your masculinity is so fragile and dependent on this kind of idiocy it doesn't say much for it, does it?

Rape is not always violently forcible from the get-go. Some rapists coerce their victims into it, and some only get violent when their initial advances fail.

If people are into rape-play or similar things, it needs to be talked about and consented to beforehand. Otherwise, when somebody says "no" or "stop," it means "no" and "stop," and everything beyond that isn't erotic - it's rape.

Oh great, the MRA troll is back.

You're not funny anymore. Get new material.

A wonderful, insightful article from the same author:

http://www.returnofkings.com/6886/3-signs-shes-making-a-false-rape-accusation

Does anyone happen to have Loreena Bobbitt's phone number? No reason, just curious.

Because no one ever ignores what someone else says, am I right?

>returnofkings
>hiding the url
Stop promoting your shitty website

I'm fully aware you're a troll, but even so:

FUCK YOU.

On the off chance your not just the other troll...

In my experience the girls that like to say no when they really mean yes? They'll fucking tell you in advance if you make the wrong move after a while. This happened to me in an early college relationship. Girl said no, I stopped, then like the third time this happened she was like "you didn't have to stop you know". And then we got a safety word (which was her real "no") and everything was fine.

I suppose hypothetically you could miss out on some sex from somebody who wasn't as good a communicator, but I think erring on the side of caution is the sensible route until specifically told otherwise.

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