[ SECRET POST #2683 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2683 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 013 secrets from Secret Submission Post #383.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

04. http://i.imgur.com/UBWScX4.png

[rubbertea]

dat cover. it looks like he's fucking her armpit.

[bur]

I wouldn't be surprised if that's exactly what he's doing.

...also, is that a thing? Is there an armpit-fucking fetish out there? TO GOOGLE!!

[(Anonymous)]

Mmm, dat Fabio.

[(Anonymous)]

I wish I had something helpful to tell you OP, but all I got is that I HATED being on birthcontrol. I hated how it made me feel. V. happy I'm in a committed relationship to someone who I have no risk of getting pregnant by and don't have to worry with that shit anymore.

[kallanda_lee]

This is like the main reason I'm not on hormonal birth control. Not worth it for me. Not in a million years.And I don't even want to know what hormones mess up in your head. I know some people look at me funny for using condoms in a committed relationship, but fuck it, I don't care.

[(Anonymous)]

If your fandom doesn't want you because you're not getting all hot and bothered over everything anymore, then drop the fandom!

I've never really had a problem being an ace in fandom. I just tell people I'm not really interested in fic, and no one really has a problem about it.

[a_potato]

I'm trying to think of something constructive to say to this, because I relate so much to it and have been through it.

BC totally killed my sex drive. My libido's recovering a bit since going off BC, but it still isn't what it was. And my fandom participation nosedived when I stopped having an overriding interest in smut.

So, you're not alone, OP. It's a thing that happens. It's pretty normal, from what I understand.

As far as finding and fitting in with other spaces goes, I have no doubt that you would be able to find a niche that suits you. There's something for everyone out there, from the most libidinous individuals to the least. There are absolutely people who will accept you as you are now. You've just got to take the plunge.

If you discover that it isn't actually what you want, then try to view it as an opportunity to develop new interests. Maybe there's something you've been wanting to try and haven't, because you haven't had the time. Well, now you do have the time. Who knows? You might like whatever you take up even better than you once liked fandom.

[ibbity]

brb dying of laughter at that ludicrous picture. I love romance novel covers.

[chardmonster]

Hey. You need to make sure there isn't a problem with your guy. You're saying he might have a "low libido" but he might just be saying that. Make sure you actually check. And then initiate stuff anyway.

[diet_poison]

Hey, OP, there are tons of things to do in fandom even if you're not interested in smut. I hardly ever read smut (and much of the time when I do it's cracky). I like romance, adventure, friendship, family fic...I'm sure you can find people who want to talk about non-smexy things. :P

[(Anonymous)]

I totally relate to the first part. Smutty fics are pretty much all I read these days. Although, even though I always had a strong libido, BC actually somehow upped my libido. Not sure how that works, but it did

[forgottenjester]

Welp, you could always try those new corners. It's better than just giving up, right?

[intrigueing]

That picture is THE BEST THING. I love her face.

[elaminator]

That cover is magnificent. (Sorry about your libido? I know a lot of fandom is all about the porn, but I also know there are plenty of people who either don't like it at all, or don't focus on it. I'm sure if you want to stay in fandom you can find someplace to hang out, or people to talk to.)

[(Anonymous)]

BC killed mine too. Still haven't totally gotten it back even after being off it for some years.

[(Anonymous)]

BC killed my libido too. I also tend to feel bad about not wanting as much sex anymore (am also in a committed relationship). But having a predictable, lighter, less painful period is really nice in addition to the no babies thing.

As others have said, there are other parts to fandom. I know it's sometimes difficult to find things that aren't "sexsexsexsex!!" but they're there.

[(Anonymous)]

I feel this so hard. I only lasted a few months on the pill, I felt like I'd lost something when fic didn't interest me as much. I actually made an appointment to get an IUD an hour ago, thanks to new health insurance. Hopefully it works out better...

[(Anonymous)]

I....read the book that cover is representing.

Yeah. Maybe I should make my own secret or something.

I totally recognized that cover!

[(Anonymous)]

Man of My Dreams by Johanna Lindsey. It was actually a picture just inside the cover, but I had to get rid of it. Most covers I don't care about and I don't really care if someone else sees me reading a romance novel, but, damn, some pictures/covers are too much. Of course, it may have been used for other books.

Anyway, there are other kinds of fic out there. Check them out, see what you like, if you find something, then you have a place to start from.

[(Anonymous)]

Here's what you do, OP:

1. Watch some shows. (Or movies, or read some books, whatever's your thing.)

2. Observe shit going on in said media which is unrelated, or only indirectly or incidentally related, to sex and/or sexuality.

3. Go on Tumblr and post your observations concerning any of said shit which you find interesting and would like to talk about. Tag these posts with related words so that people tracking tags about them will see your comments.

4. Google "_________ forum" (or community) and see if you can find places where people talk about _________, that being whatever interesting shit we discussed earlier. (Also you can peruse Dreamwidth and/or LiveJournal interests.) If so, sign up and lurk for a while. If you like what you see, then when you feel ready, first check the rules for that place to make sure you don't break them and then introduce yourself and start discussing.

You may have to slog through some porn to get to them, but chances are you'll find plenty of others who are fannish but not sex-obsessed. We do exist out here, I promise.

[mimi-sardinia.livejournal.com]

That picture reminds me of this: https://farm3.staticflickr.com/2170/1793384455_198182410c.jpg

Which looks like it's the photo a picture that is either Maglor or Fingon was based on in a piece of Silmarillion fanart.

My RP partner has that picture on her Maglor account, and given we have a background relationship going on between him and the Sea Silmaril.

On the other hand that body is waaay too beefcake for an Elf too, which, back-fucking notwithstanding - makes my associating it with Cáno and Ellenlossë rather... amusing.

[(Anonymous)]

I've been on BC since I was 17 (I'm 30 now) for ovarian cysts and cramp management (seizures from cramps - not fun), and now this thread is making me wonder if that's why I'm asexual. I always thought I was just naturally sex repulsed. I can read and enjoy smut, but IRL, I want nothing to do with it. Now I'm going to be all lost in thought all day.

[(Anonymous)]

This whole thread is making me wonder if they way BC actually works is by making you never want to have sex.

[(Anonymous)]

Try Gen fic and lower rated slash and pre-slash. There is a lot more to fandom and fanfic than porn. :)