[ SECRET POST #2812 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2812 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 047 secrets from Secret Submission Post #402.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Who's the most insufferable person you know IRL? What sorts of things to do they do to earn the title?

Trolls on the internet or whatever don't count.

[(Anonymous)]

There's someone at work who's above me but treats me like she's a kindergarden teacher.

Like she'll tell me to write something down, then proceed to explain how I should hold my pen.

Of course that exact situation didn't happen, but every time she tells me to do something it feels like this!

[(Anonymous)]

1. TELL her that. Not in those words, but say "seriously. I've got this."

2. If that doesn't work, is there anyone above her you can talk to?

I had a colleague above me bully me for years - I kept thinking it would get better, but it only got worse, to the point where she really was basically telling me how to hold my pen. I honestly think if I'd told her to STFU from the beginning, yeah, she would've hated me more (as opposed to seeming to like me until she didn't, which was how it was), I could have saved myself a lot of misery.

[(Anonymous)]

Agreed with previous comment. Smile warmly and humorously as if you're best buds and say, "Thanks [name], I've got this" or "Thank you, I've got it now". The key is pretending to be 100% sincere and grateful and to beam like she's handed you an award.

[(Anonymous)]

Older man works at a big company and creeps on women my age.

He's a dick in general but people just take it because he's in a position of power. I also can't fucking understand how people continue to want to have a friendship with him when he's like that. He makes my skin crawl.

[(Anonymous)]

Myself. I'm socially inept, I just can't let go of grudges, I'm prone to bouts of self-hate, and, contrary to any other toxic person, I can't cut ties and start afresh; I'm stuck with the insufferableness 'til death.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't really know her anymore, but I knew this girl in college who acted like one of those mean girls in school. She actually basically hinted I should leave their table at lunch once! I just pretended I didn't know what she was doing and stayed there, because middle school tactics are middle school. I'm not sure where she is now, but I feel sorry for whoever has to deal with her.

[ex_mek82]

There was this guy who used to work where I do currently. Apparently, he'd worked there before, but left for a few years and then came back about late 2012. He was, quite possibly, the jackass to end all jackasses. He always put down everyone, got in peoples' faces if they didn't do something the way he wanted them to, put off doing work and/or shoveled most of his stuff onto me, and he was a very opinionated far-right kind of person, with all sort of whackjob political theories that made my eyes roll out of my head several times a day. Even worse, one time he once proudly proclaimed he'd hit a woman in a fight, saying that if she swung the first punch, he'd have no qualms punching her back, if not harder. After I got in his face about something else, he whined about how everyone at work "ganged up" on him and how he was a victim, basically.

He also had a tendency to blow off coming into work until late in the mornings. Rainy days? He'd be in at least 2-3 hours late. Light snow on the ground? He wouldn't come in at all. This kept going for the year and a half he was there, and despite everyone's complaints, the Boss didn't do much of anything. It wasn't until, I think, last December, that one morning, the guy came in late yet again. Not long after he started his shift, the Boss asked to speak to him in his office. About 10-odd minutes later, the Boss came to the backroom and announced that the guy would "no longer be working here" and that one of the other guys would be taking over receiving.

Needless to say, it was an incredibly awkward experience as he all but stated the guy was fired, but some of us started singing the Happy Days theme song during our lunch breaks, haha.

I don't know what happened to him since then... and quite frankly, I think that's for the best.

[(Anonymous)]

My high school counselor, who I've mentioned here before, was an obnoxiously buoyant guy who constantly invalidated our feelings and laughed at us. Since he was an authority, and his bosses agreed with his tactics, we couldn't fight back without getting emotionally beaten down even further. After four years, every word in his smug voice made me want to stab something.

[(Anonymous)]

Parents' friend's son. I won't get into the myriad of what he's done that doesn't involve me, but in this case, we are 25 and 28 respectively. When our families are meeting together, we're seated together because of both our similar age but also because we're both the only completely fluent English-speakers.

He acts as though I am not there the entire time. If he's not looking at his phone or chatting with whoever is on his side, I'm not even here to think about. It's not like I'm waiting for him to do all the work, I have tried every conversation point there is. I get monosyllabic answers and he turns to the first person else who can draw his attention. I end up sitting there for three hours, bored out of my skull because the "grown-ups" assume I'm being entertained by the son. If he was in my house and I was expected to see to his interests, I would never even think of behaving this way.

I guess it also hurts because of the fact that culturally we're supposedly raised with some old-fashioned chivalry. Any other woman at the table will get a courteous conversation from this kid. I don't get an ounce of consideration, and in the end I feel like it's because I look so young (as if that's an excuse), as if I have no feelings to hurt.

I've taken to not going to his house with my parents, or if I do I politely skip dinner and go read in another room. It was either that or exploding and calling him an assdouche right there at the table, for which a. my mother would kill me, and b. I am too much of a lady to resort to that. WHO'S THE GROWN UP HERE, YA FUCKER?

[(Anonymous)]

I legit promise I'm not trying to be political here but…a former Israeli soldier in my lab.

My boss liked to give out spots to former service members and we had a former Marine who was a joy to work with.

But this guy…he was just an asshole. And sexist. He'd constantly make disparaging comments about women even though his boss (our PI) was a woman!

And he'd constantly try to be talking to the other military guy and challenging him (dick measuring contest away!).

And he looked down on anyone who wasn't Jewish (although, ironically, the only other Jewish member of our lab was the only one never to meet him).

And he also asked horribly inappropriate questions at times.

And he didn't take his job seriously. The dumbass didn't pay attention to how he was loading a Western blot -- even though we need to do QUANTITATIVE analysis on it.

What a fucker. Fortunately we got rid of him after a few months.

[(Anonymous)]

My mother.

She is the most miserable person I know and she always make herself to be the victim. She's the only person I know who could burn down an orphanage and still claim to be the victim because she used the last of her matches to do cause the arson.

Everything out of her mouth is, "You know who died/is dying?" "You know what horrible thing your aunt did?" "You know who is an idiot?" "You know what I hate?" I am drained after every time she talks to me. She is like an rain cloud that is determined to drown me in misery.

She and I are always butting heads because she treats me like a rival rather than a daughter. To the point that she can say something and I correct her with physical proof and she will refuse to look at the proof just so she can continue to say that I am wrong. For example, one time I asked her where did she put a container of leftovers because I was looking for an easy dinner. She told me that I was nuts because I had thrown it out yesterday. I told her I did not. She, again, said I was crazy because she had seen me, herself, throw it out. Of course, I did find it a moment later in the back of the fridge. I held it out to show that she was the one who was in the wrong. But she refused to look and kept on telling me how I was a liar and crazy.

I have no respect for her. I know I should because she is my mom but I can't bring myself to have any because the way she acts.

[(Anonymous)]

1) That fandom friend from the internet that's invading my real life.
Anytime there's a big event in my town she'll ask to come over and spend time together.
I live in a shared flat with no spare room; usually guests sleep on a cot in the living room. The first time she came over at my place that was what we did. After what she complained that it was "uncomfortable". So next time I was forced to lend her my bed--I loathe the idea of sleeping with anyone else and she knows it. I don't mind sleeping on the living room cot myself, what I do mind is her nosily digging through the stuff in my room to see what books I have and making a mess of everything.
She's also a picky eater and a hypocrite at that; she pretends that she'll eat almost anything but objected to everything I could think of proposing. She had me buy special groceries just for her that she knows I never eat myself so she could still have all her favorite things... then when after they were already bought, she insisted we ate out outside of cooking at my place.
Since then, now when she comes again to my town she usually stays at one of her relatives' house instead of mine and we meet only for the event.

Then. We had something planned this weekend for weeks before. Only last week did she warn me that her relative couldn't have her this time and if I didn't offer to take her in she would not come at all and wouldn't it be so sad after another one of our friends already had bailed out... and she did so on a public chatroom with the peer pressure of our common internet friends waiting for me to be the oh so good friend who'll say "why of course yes!"
I was woken up in the middle of the night by my flatmates and their improvised guests coming back from their part of the big event and claiming the living room for themselves; so I had to choose between crawling back to the bed where she was taking all the space and hogging the covers and snoring like a pig, or staying awake in the kitchen with a book til dawn come.


2) Myself, for frakking letting all that mess happen.

[(Anonymous)]

One of the central figures of my oldest group of friends. She's betrayed or turned against each one of us at one time or another, but still people fall over themselves to forgive her. She remains the most popular member of the group to this day.

[feotakahari]

My aunt is very trendy and thinks she's cool. When she got pregnant, she insisted the baby "wouldn't change her life"--and it hasn't! After her relationship with her husband fell apart, she was theoretically the primary caretaker, but the kid's practically been raised by nannies and tutors. The little one's developed all sorts of hangups (there was a period in which she completely refused to talk), and my aunt doesn't even seem to care. I feel like she had a child because she felt that was the trend, and now she's ridden the trend, she's no longer interested.

[(Anonymous)]

Three people come to mind:

1. A girl I fortunately only meet about once a year when we both are visiting a mutual acquaintance on her birthday. She's that friend's friend and I really don't know how you can be friends with a person like that. She is incredibly rude (keeps interrupting people, keeps complaining about the food people brought but eats it anyway even though there is other stuff available etc.) but the main problem I have with her is that she's pretty right-wing-stupid. All the evil foreigners taking "our" jobs, those weird languages of those weird foreign people, slurs and all.
Because I don't see her often and because I don't want to cause the mutual friend any grief, I keep quiet about it. But damn, I can't stand her.

2. A girl I met in a theater/musical group. She thinks she's the most flawless person to ever grace the stage and the best singer to walk this earth but she really, really sucks. So much that even her sister tried to persuade her after a show that no, singer is probably not the ideal occupation for her. She also inherited a huge company from her father and doesn't really work there but reaps all the benefits and has a shitload of money. Which I wouldn't mind, really. But her attitude is insufferable. One example: Several people talk about how little money they have and how they don't know how to pay the rent this month, important things like that. That girl listened to the whole conversation and still thought it was a good idea to go "Guys LOOK I just bought a new Louis Vuitton bag! I know, it's already the third (!) this month but I JUST couldn't resist!".

3. An old friend of my mother. She's not exactly 100% sane (not kidding, she has incredible issues). Fortunately, she lives in another country so I don't have to meet her anymore, but she keeps calling once in a while. Once, the phone rang with an unknown number and I made the mistake of answering it. It was that person, and she kept talking at me. And boy did she say lovely things. She told me I wasn't supposed to be single and I should find a boyfriend already and have kids. She basically said "I forbid you to drink tea with a friend on this saturday afternoon, you have to go out and party and find a boyfriend".
She kept hating on my best friend of 25 years - and her only reason for that is: We were on a trip to France over ten years ago, my friend came with us. We visited that woman and her husband during that trip. My friend didn't help setting the table (mostly because she didn't know the place and was weirded out by that woman). That was all it took to make a lifelong enemy of that woman.
So during that conversation on the phone, she kept calling my friend names, kept saying I should stop seeing that "lazy bitch" and how she was a terrible, disgusting person.
And then to top it all off, she started subtly insulting my father.
I ended the conversation as soon as I could (still took me about an hour of abused and bullshit thrown at my head). I didn't want to just hang up because I didn't want to cause my mother any trouble with that crazy person. But yeah, she is a real charming piece of work.

[chardmonster]

My ex.

Unfortunately it's also part of the bit I like about him, the bastard.

[(Anonymous)]

My mother.

She's incredibly self-pitying and neurotic, and refuses to even consider the possibility that she may have an anxiety issue. She constantly invalidates my emotions, refuses to treat me like an adult and thinks everything I do is a jibe at her in some way. She's a huge fan of gaslighting and pretending that things didn't happen, mostly to avoid criticism. No one else is allowed to have a bad day, but when she does we all know about it.

She also treats my dad like shit. He's the breadwinner of the family and works his arse off 24/7, and she complains constantly because he "didn't get the right groceries", "didn't cook food she liked" etc. yet she never shops or cooks for herself. She absolutely hates the fact that me and Dad get along well and eavesdrops on our conversations frequently so she can find something to take out of context and start an argument about.

Whenever I try to leave the house during an argument (go for a walk, chill at a friend's house etc.) she breaks down sobbing and begging me not to leave, even threatening to destroy my property if I do go.

She's basically batshit insane. I'm an adult but unfortunately still live with her, so have to maintain a level of civility. I feel bad for saying it because she's my mother and she does have her good points sometimes, but I have little to no love or respect for her at all.

[(Anonymous)]

My mother-in-law. Selfish and flaky as hell, no brain-to-mouth filter but takes offense at EVERYTHING, including the times when people get irritated with her for blurting out something insulting or just plain dumb.

[herpymcderp]

There are plenty of people I have known in the past who could take this title... fortunately I don't actually talk to any of them anymore. Or I've taken steps to make their insufferability a non-issue.

So currently on the list of people I go out of my way to avoid, I don't like my friend's mom very much? That's less of a them being insufferable than me holding a grudge for trying to sabotage our friendship for years for reasons having to do with my atheism and queerness and then being incredibly hypocritical about those same reasons years later.

In terms of being around someone I find annoying? An ex-room mate probably takes that prize. Living with him was a massive clusterfuck of passive-aggression and whinging over the tiniest imaginary inconveniences and him not cleaning his messes. On the other hand he's pretty fun to hang out with so I don't try to avoid him if he's around.

[(Anonymous)]

there are two in our social circle. caveat: one just recently got put on medication for depression and the other has several diagnosed issues but isn't being treated for them. Deliberately.

actually make that three: #1's fiance is insufferable as well as also suffering some mental issues for which he isn't bothering to get treated.

one is extremely narcissistic to the point of making every problem about her even when it isn't remotely, lived with her parents until she was 30 and as a result is very poorly adjusted to having to maintain her own life, and blows little annoyances up into Mt. Everest-sized apocalypses. And then wonders why she keeps losing friends. It feeds her paranoia that everything is her fault in a horrible cycle, because even when it isn't she makes it about her, and then blames herself when people turn on her.

another is a chronic waffler, who flakes on everything and makes up chronic illnesses in order to avoid dealing with people. I fell for it for a long time until the friend who's known her the longest tipped me off that she isn't actually sick or suffering pain when she claims she is. I hate having my sympathies played with so I wrote her off on the spot.

fiance is just not really all there. he's one of those nerds who has like two things he's really obsessively into, and brings one or both of them up at every opportunity and will restart conversations that have been shut down or had the subject changed. also has an unhealthy paranoia complex and very low self-esteem.

[(Anonymous)]

A writing professor who told us that if we didn't like the stories we read for class, it's a problem with us and it needed to be fixed. Smh, I can't tell you.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm fairly lucky in that I don't personally "know" anyone who's too difficult to get along with. (This may be partly because I'm a semi-recluse and tend to cut ties with anyone who looks like they're going to become obnoxious as quickly as possible.)

I've dealt with a few real winners at my job, however. There's three in particular who come to mind (a man and two women,) and they were all the same basic type: impatient and self-important as hell, affronted that our company's policies and procedures did not align with their view of how reality should be, and willing to go to any length necessary to get what they thought they were entitled to, to the point that I seriously felt they were crossing the line into harrassment.

I'm exceedingly grateful not to actually have any such people in my own personal circle where I can't escape them, and anyone who does has my sincere sympathy.

[(Anonymous)]

Sometimes I think I'm the most insufferable person I know. *sigh*

[lunabee34]

I can't post about the most insufferable person I know. Instead I will tell you all about a moderately insufferable person.

Several years ago, someone I thought was a friend asked me if we wanted to be added to their Amazon Prime account. She framed it as, "Hey, we just realized we could add people for free to the account and thought you might want to be on it." I said sure and was grateful. At the end of the year, she told me they'd decided not to renew their service, and I was all, "Okay, cool, thanks for this past year," and then we got our own Amazon Prime account.

I found out recently that she has been badmouthing us since then for not paying them for being added to their service (and they didn't really cancel their service; they just wanted us off it). At no point did she ask for money; she framed it as a gift, a cool thing she realized she could do for someone she liked. If she had said, "Hey, we realized we could add people to our account; want to give me 20 bucks for the privilege of free Amazon shipping?" that would be one thing. But she didn't.

I am reminded of the time my Aunt Ruby offered to quilt me a blanket. I already owned several of her quilts and cherish them because they are homemade by family. When she had finished it, Aunt Ruby presented me with the quilt and a bill. I was astonished. If she'd said, "Want me to make you a quilt? It'll be about 30 bucks for materials and labor," that would be different.

What is with this passive aggressive bullshit re: money? I would never invite people over for dinner and present them with a bill after dessert. I might say BEFOREHAND!, "Hey, y'all, boulibasse is expensive. Wanna pitch in?" or ask if somebody would bring the shrimp and somebody else the crabs, but I wouldn't magically assume my guests could divine that I wanted them to do so.

I am so fucking pissed about this horrible woman.