[ SECRET POST #5649 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #5649 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


01.
[Ted Lasso]



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04.



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05. [SPOILERS for Jurassic World Dominion]




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06. [SPOILERS for Jurassic World Dominion]




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07. [WARNING for discussion of marital infidelity]




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08. [WARNING for discussion of incest]



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09. [WARNING for discussion of child abuse, sexualization of children]





























Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #808.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

07. [WARNING for discussion of marital infidelity]
https://i.imgur.com/HuBUC1X.png

[fscom]

(just to note here, this warning is here at OP's request, I'm not putting all infidelity secrets on friday or anything)

[(Anonymous)]

… do people really hate infidelity in fics that much? I really like it, and would happily say so off anon.

[(Anonymous)]

I hate it personally, but I'm not an anti about it. I just avoid it.

[(Anonymous)]

Same.

[(Anonymous)]

I hate it a lot, but just avoid reading it.

[(Anonymous)]

I think a lot of people strongly dislike when it shows up in a romance story & it's portrayed as romantic and positive and fluffy.

For me personally I like it sometimes in smutty kinky ways but not as a romance trope.

[(Anonymous)]

idk, it's not my thing, I have literally zero fucks to give. I don't read it because it's not in my wheelhouse just like furry and A/B/O is not my thing so I don't read it.

but holy shit in some corners of fandom anything that even suggests cheating, including open relationships, is villified as fuck like cheating on someone is worse than murder. I had someone comment on my fic which was clearly tagged open relationship and poly and threesome that characters A and B would never cheat on each other how dare I, I'm filth and evil. I had to report them because their vitriolic comments would just keep coming no matter how often I deleted them. so yeah, some people do. even if it's just a whiff of "infidelity if you assumed this ship was monogamous even though I never said it was."

[(Anonymous)]

I really don’t like it, but I don’t like it in the way I don’t like several other things in fic like ABO, furry, gore, etc. It’s really not a big deal, I just avoid it. No hate to the people that like it.

[(Anonymous)]

Welp, F!S has spoken and the overwhelming consensus is, yeah, people hate it! Lol!

In all seriousness though, the thing I've noticed about infidelity as a trope is that it almost never shows up when people are asked about tropes/kinks they like (even when the question is about unpopular tropes/kinks that people like), but it shows up quite frequently when people are asked about tropes/topics that they always dislike and will nope out of immediately.

Infidelity isn't disliked as vociferously as some other tropes, but I can't really think of any other tropes where the "likes" to "dislikes" ratio is so heavily slanted to the dislikes.

[(Anonymous)]

I like it, too.

People be like, oh, I love furry noncon guro, but no affairs. Lol fandom.

[(Anonymous)]

Some people just don’t like it, but like the other things? If they’re being a dick about it to the people who do like it and write it, then that’s obviously stupid. But it just seems like you’re stating some other things you could find in fic like noncon or guro and making fun of people who might like them but not be into cheating? Yeah, those things are worse in real life than cheating(except for furry, so I don’t know why you included that), but this isn’t real life. So just because cheating isn’t as bad as those irl doesn’t make liking infidelity in fics better than liking furry/noncon/guro. They’re all just personal tastes that aren’t better or worse than each other on their own in fiction or in the act of enjoyment.

Maybe I’m off base about what you meant with this reply, but this is how it reads to me. If what you meant is something more like that it’s ridiculous for people to get mad about infidelity in fic or media when they were warned, or they judge others for liking it when they aren’t strangers to liking “problematic” things, I can agree.

[(Anonymous)]

For real tho. I think a lot of people have a tendency to react with more hostility to mundane forms of "problematic" content than they do to extreme stuff--probably because the mundane stuff feels closer to home for most people, like something that could very easily happen to them or maybe has happened to them (despite the fact that sexual assault is extremely prevalent and actually no less likely to happen to most people--especially women--than being cheated on by a spouse, so in reality noncon is just as "close to home" as infidelity is).

Zero judgement for people with dark and/or extreme kinks, but yeah, there really is a bit of a double standard in which a lot of people who wouldn't bat an eye at all manner of DD;DNE stuff are vocally squicked by cheating unless it's purely depicted as Bad Miserable Awful Bad.

[(Anonymous)]

While it's not something I like in fics, outright, I find that when done right it can be a (admittedly angsty AF) read. I just started reading one fic when A is cheating on B with C, who is a housekeeper and has always had to fend off rumors but here she is finally falling into the trap and she feels guilty but A&B had issues to work out and B doesn't want the divorce when A asks for it even though she knows he's cheating -- but they're all written sympathetically, like B isn't a bitch, she's a person struggling with certain traumas and expectations A has, and he's not bad bad, he was feeling neglected and when he'd try to find a way to spend tome with B she never had time, etc. Like no one here is evil and omg so awful. It's just people making (poor) choices in the moment and trying to rectify them.

Anyway. I started writing a fuc once that included infidelity, but I wasn't sure if I wanted the male lead/antagonist to be 1. steadfast & loyal to his just gave birth wife, who just happened to find himself captivated by the female lead (which is likely more IC, at least for the sake of family name and prejudice) 2. Already dabbling in philandering behavior 3. It's kind of an undercover open relationshipto begin with because they're essentially part of this cult. Aka essentially swingers when their little cult meetings wrap up for the night with an orgy

[(Anonymous)]

The thing that gets me is that infidelity is shitty behavior that shouldn't be romanticised. Leaving someone for somebody else because your feelings have changed is one thing. Not nice but a part of life. Cheating on someone is full on douche behavior and marks you as scum for life

[(Anonymous)]

I mean, yeah. Like 50% of the things people kink on in fiction are "shitty behavior" in reality.

[(Anonymous)]

LOL, noncon/dubcon is a very popular fictional kink...you think cheating is worse than RAPE? It's really really not. Like not even close.

[(Anonymous)]

Yessss, I love it too!! I've only written two fics about cheating*, but it's so interesting to me to get into those messed up emotions. Why are they doing it, and why can't they stop doing it? Especially if they're otherwise good people - how are you going to justify it to yourself, even if you know it's wrong? There's just so much angsty gold to mine.


* Shameless self-promo - read tell me how all this, and love too, will ruin us by CourtneyCourtney on AO3. :D

[(Anonymous)]

I enjoy infidelity fics/plots similarly! Like, if the drama and storytelling is engaging I love it so much!

Yeah, the complicated feelings and characters not being on their best behavior in romance tends to be frowned upon because people don't want to give off the impression that they are OK with infidelity.

But it's complicated, that's what makes reading/writing about cheating or love triangles fun (for me). I don't want it ALL the time but when I come across a good one it's so fun to read! The emotional roller coasters!!

[(Anonymous)]

I think there's a big divide about what "cheating" means.

Like, is the big squick about your partner having sex with someone else, or is it about lying? There's someone posting in this thread who said they got hate for writing consensual polyam and threesome fic, from people acting like that's "cheating."

And I absolutely believe that happened, because people who think that romantic love can only be real between two people, never more than that, are everywhere and it's tiresome as fuck.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm totally 'meh' on infidelity in fic. I just don't care about it that much. Most of my ships aren't canon and would involve cheating or breakups with the characters' canon love interests.

[(Anonymous)]

People are talking about infidelity fic as a kink vs a trope of romance, and I'm afraid I don't quite understand it -- I suppose the kink is something that pertains to the sexual aspect of the action? (If someone could break it down or confirm, I'd appreciate it!).

Personally, I get the taboo nature of it, as many have mentioned *this is wrong, we should stop but we can't, etc.*. I find I get...maybe not a pleasure, but this feeling of righteous anger/indignation when the story being told is from the perspective of the person being cheated on. I wonder how the character feels, how will they react? How will the truth be exposed, etc. Will they call the other person out, will they cheat on them as well, will they forgive them and stay or move on, etc. I like when the person ends up doing better for themselves after the fact. Of course, it's easier when the cheating character is painted in an unsympathetic light, but if it's a person who's generally good and made a mistake etc, it's those complicated feelings that makes things messier / easier.

[(Anonymous)]

People are talking about infidelity fic as a kink vs a trope of romance, and I'm afraid I don't quite understand it -- I suppose the kink is something that pertains to the sexual aspect of the action? (If someone could break it down or confirm, I'd appreciate it!).

OP - I don't really understand it either, tbh. The two aren't separate for me; they're more like thoroughly interconnected components of the same whole. I don't really understand what people mean when they say they like it as a kink but not as a trope of romance. (I respect their stance on the matter but I don't think I entirely understand what they mean.) Does it mean the cheating can be hot, but they don't want it to be love that moves the characters to cheat with each other? Like, they prefer if it's just raw desire that motivates them and not an emotional connection?

I can understand that, though I guess I feel the opposite way, since I'm only interested in infidelity if the characters who are cheating with each other have a deep connection and each feels like the other is it for them.

Or possibly some people just define romance much less broadly than I do? To me, romance is just the interpersonal stuff that grows from a base of romantic love. It can look like just about anything.

[(Anonymous)]

DA

I'll be honest - in the kind of infidelity fic I like, I really don't think all that much about the character being cheated on. No malice and I hope they get out and do better...but the story isn't about them.

[(Anonymous)]

It's not that infidelity is a trope I seek to read or write, but when I think it fits characterisation, I enjoy it a lot. It's not about romanticizing anything, it's about people being people - who do all sorts of questionable shit irl. No one's ideal and unproblematic and that's what interesting, and the fandom's persistent urge to sterilize characters and narrations irks the fuck out of me.