[ SECRET POST #3422 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3422 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 033 secrets from Secret Submission Post #489.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

i believe asexuality exists, but you should look into underlying causes first like depression, thyroid issues, ect. first before claiming the label

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

Not to mention the inability to get a date, but don't want to admit they can't get dates. That is the leading cause of asexuality in America.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

0/0

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

That, besides it takes the stress out of life entirely AND bugs the grown ups. A Kinder Surprise for teenagers.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

"That is the leading cause of asexuality in America."

But what about Europe? What's the leading cause in Europe? Maybe we should send you off to Europe so we can get a definitive statement on their problem.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

Nope, that's MRAs like you

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

I agree. But people also have to realize that there's a difference between wondering is your average seventeen-year-old asexual-identifying person has explored other potential underlying causes, and asking someone who's thirty-five and identifies as asexual.

Asking someone who's thirty-five and asexual whether they've "really considered all the possibilities" is condescending as fuck.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

Asking someone who's thirty-five and asexual whether they've "really considered all the possibilities" is condescending as fuck.

Yep. I'm still a few years from 35 but I'm still old enough to know who I am and people constantly questioning me is annoying as fuck. I have no medical or hormonal issues of any kind (I've been tested because of some things that run in my family), and there's a user here who's accused me of lying about it several times in the past because they don't believe someone can be asexual without having some kind of medical problem. It's incredibly frustrating.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[lady_dragoon]

Asking someone who's thirty-five and asexual whether they've "really considered all the possibilities" is condescending as fuck.

Fun fact: many people don't get diagnosed with major medical issues that can affect sex drive and attraction (thyroid problems especially) until after 30.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

...can thyroid issues cause asexuality? Because I am trying to get mine straightened out and I've had next to no sex drive for like ever. Huh.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[lady_dragoon]

Yes. Overactive or underactive thyroid can affect everything from sex drive to weight to insomnia to GI problems.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

A poorly functioning thyroid is just one of many root causes of a non or underfunctioning sex drive.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

Thyroid issues can fuck with a lot of things, as I can attest to from personal experience. It's hard to feel in the mood for sexytimes when you're dead tired ALL THE DAMN TIME, with no ability to concentrate on anything because you're struggling through a constant mind fog.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

Your thyroid can fuck up pretty much every system in your body, so yes.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

one of the stupidest things I've ever read is a tumblr post from an asexual person saying they "knew they were asexual since [they were] 3 years old"

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

I don't know about 3 years old, but looking back, as a kid (I'm not sure exactly the age, definitely older than 3 though) I knew I was different in a way that I now recognize as being asexual/aromantic. When I was young and all my friends would be running around having "weddings" on the playground and pretending their dolls were their babies...even back then I knew I wanted no part of any of that. And when I learned what sex was, I knew it was something I didn't want to do. I know all kids think sex is gross, but I never changed my mind. I became a teenager, had sex several times, still thought it was gross, became an adult, still felt the same way, and eventually realized I was asexual.

So while 3 is definitely young to know you're ANYTHING as far as sexuality goes (though there is a family friend who everyone claims they knew was gay when he was 3), I don't think it's out of the realm of possibility to realize you're what you'll later recognize as asexual as a kid (since it's not well known enough for most kids to have any idea what it is, they'll probably just feel like they're weird and different).

Re: controversial opinions thread

[feotakahari]

+1. I thought I was asexual, but it turned out I had undiagnosed issues with my immune system.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

Good for you, but keep that shit to yourself. Spreading stories around like that is only going to harm people.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

As someone who's asexual (and not under 21), I appreciate that you mention that people should check into it first.

Maybe if people wouldn't use asexuality as an excuse or "self-diagnose" it like they do with mental illnesses, other people would take asexuality seriously. I'm doing absolutely nothing to hurt you, everyone else, please just let me be and you can go along your merry way.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

This drives me nuts. Who you are (or aren't) sexually attracted to isn't something people need to "check into." If someone is sexually attracted to people of the same sex, most people (who are not religious zealots) are not going to suggest they need to see if they have a medical issue. Sure, a low sex drive can be a symptom of a medical problem, but that's not the same thing as being asexual (even though people frequently conflate the two).

Maybe if people wouldn't use asexuality as an excuse or "self-diagnose" it like they do with mental illnesses, other people would take asexuality seriously.

It's not a mental illness, though. People "self-diagnose" being gay or bi all the time and no one has a problem with that. Asexuality is a sexual orientation, not a disorder, and the issue isn't that people "self-diagnose" it, it's that a lot of people are just ignorant and/or assholes to people who aren't like them.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[lb_lee]

Enh, in my case, I turned out not to be ace because of MASSIVE sexual trauma issues... but the ace label was still a huge boon for me. I couldn't deal with the trauma any faster or more thoroughly than I already was; calling myself asexual at least gave me an option besides "broken" or "frigid."

*shrug*

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

Agreed. I spent a long time thinking I was asexual when it actually turned out to be the symptom of a medical issue.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

Meh. Why start policing that label and not the myriad other labels that people self-apply?

I think you're trying to say "you should look into these things because it may be causing problems", which is a good sentiment. But the part where you need to do all of that "before claiming the label" part, is what strikes me as weird. Like your comment is less about people's personal health, and more about worrying that there might be fake asexuals.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

I mean, suppose you do have health issues. Suppose they're serious enough to make you not want sex. Does that really mean you don't have the right to call yourself asexual? Do you have some duty to society to fix yourself before you can exist as you are?

Not everything can be fixed. Sometimes people are stuck the way they are. And sometimes people are asexual even if they don't like it, whether that be something from birth or yes, a health problem.

Fuck you, since you like fucking so much.

Re: controversial opinions thread

[(Anonymous)]

Huh. I have a sex drive and masturbate but I still consider myself asexual because I'm utterly uninterested in having sex with another person. Being depressed or not depressed wouldn't change that.