case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2012-12-10 06:48 pm

[ SECRET POST #2169 ]


⌈ Secret Post #2169 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 078 secrets from Secret Submission Post #310.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
elephantinegrace: (Default)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] elephantinegrace 2012-12-11 01:35 am (UTC)(link)
Questioning (not sure) or Queer (not sure), Intersex (neither male nor female), asexual (no sexual attraction). Actually, LGBTQQIAPA might be better, because then pansexual (attracted to people both on and off the gender binary, and allies (het supporters) would be included on the list.
otakugal15: (B/)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] otakugal15 2012-12-11 01:51 am (UTC)(link)
Uh, the amount of hate I've seen for allies, I wouldn't add that. :/ ONTD_P is a cesspit with regards to that attitude.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 01:53 am (UTC)(link)
As a gay person, the rise is Ally bashing that I've seen online, makes me want to cry.

Why do people do this? Why? What good would come of hating those who want to help our cause?!
otakugal15: (B/)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] otakugal15 2012-12-11 01:56 am (UTC)(link)
From my understanding.....it's a thing of "we fight our own battles" and if we straight people happen to stand up for someone, we're...somehow demeaning them?

So basically, if, for example, I'm out shopping and some dickwaffle is berating or even threatening someone who happens to be queer/gay/what have you....I'm supposed to walk off? Instead of trying to defend that person? Hell, even if I had no idea the person was gay, I'd still like to try to defend them, but it's somehow...wrong these days.

Or at least, that's what I get from reading posts and comments on ontd_p.
Edited 2012-12-11 01:58 (UTC)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 02:21 am (UTC)(link)
Ugh. I side-eye all of ONTD. That place is just toxic.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 02:26 am (UTC)(link)
if that is what you are getting, you are a fucking idiot. christ.
otakugal15: (Default)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] otakugal15 2012-12-11 02:27 am (UTC)(link)
Then, PLEASE, nonny. Enlighten me. Cause I see nothing wrong with defending someone. Or standing up to some douchcanoe cause he or she or they are being a dick.

B/

Allies

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Re: Allies

[personal profile] thaurfea - 2012-12-11 11:49 (UTC) - Expand

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 02:28 am (UTC)(link)
as a gay person, i am fine with it.

if you want to 'help the cause', really and truly, then your little feelings won't get hurt when some 'allies' get called out for the shit they do. or you will be understanding and not take it personally if someone who is queer is mistrusting of str8 folks and their bullshit.
otakugal15: (B/)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] otakugal15 2012-12-11 02:32 am (UTC)(link)
What bullshit? How is standing up to an asshole who is being all kinds of dickish and offensive to different people, in this case, queer people, how is this bullshit?

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 03:05 am (UTC)(link)
lol @ you taking this so personally. stop projecting your own experiences or whatever onto what i said, obviously bullshit would not be standing up to someone and helping someone in need.

the casual ignorance and microaggressions i and other queer people face day after day is the bullshit i mean.

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Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 02:38 am (UTC)(link)
As a gay person I am not fine with it, at all.

Spitting in the face, of folks who want to help, is not going to make things any better for us. We are not going to come together, as one people, if we perpetuate an 'us Vs them' attitude.

Love, not hate, never hate.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 03:06 am (UTC)(link)
sorry but it's asshole str8 people who ruined it for themselves :) omg i ~have straight friends~ but i am distrustful in general and especially wary of people who call themselves allies.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 03:12 (UTC) - Expand

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 03:19 am (UTC)(link)
Because sometimes, those "allies" whine and bitch moan about how they're ~*such good allies*~ and those damn queers should be ~*thankful*~ for their help.

No, you aren't entitled to thanks, and if you're doing this for the thanks, you're in it for the cred and not to actually fucking help. They're the kind to lump a minority together based on the actions of a few.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

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altumcor: (Default)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] altumcor 2012-12-11 01:56 am (UTC)(link)
...I'm sorry, why is there hate for allies? What did they do? I think this might be the first time I've heard of it.
maverickz3r0: trainer riding a flygon in a sandstorm (Default)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] maverickz3r0 2012-12-11 02:07 am (UTC)(link)
The argument I've seen is that apparently, Allies want acknowledgement and praise for not being terrible people and supporting us.

Whereas I've never actually seen one say such a thing, I've only seen them get a little ruffled after the whole 'die cis-het scum' trend started.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 02:11 am (UTC)(link)
..and who can blame them for that really. I'd be angry too if I was a good person, and someone told me to die.

It just makes this old gay man, want to cry.

maverickz3r0: trainer riding a flygon in a sandstorm (Default)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] maverickz3r0 2012-12-11 02:12 am (UTC)(link)
Never go into certain areas of Tumblr, then. 'Toxic' is honestly the best word to describe the attitude some of those people have.
otakugal15: (B/)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] otakugal15 2012-12-11 02:30 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, that was the other thing I was forgetting. Yes, all of us straight people want to be praised for helping defenseless gays/queer people. Because, we ALL see you as OH SO HELPLESS *gags*

Um, no. How about we just want to help people. Cause it's the right thing to do. But, apparently we can only help ourselves, cause it's some how demeaning otherwise. IDGI.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 02:46 am (UTC)(link)
Tinfoil hat time.

I see it as a ploy by homophobic groups to cause discontent, and infighting within the cause. Anger is one hell of a drug, and by using anger to lash out at anyone, and everyone, no matter who they are, will just alienate us further from becoming equal.

I hope I'm wrong, but sometimes I worry...

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] glo_unit 2012-12-11 03:12 am (UTC)(link)
Here's the thing, some allies do act like that. Some act like they are the saviors the the LGBT rights movement and are offended by not being treated as such. While hating all allies is wrong I don't think it is good not call out and question problematic behavior from allies.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

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Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

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Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

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altumcor: (t&b - 8D)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] altumcor 2012-12-11 02:41 am (UTC)(link)
I've never come across that before. I mean, I get the idea that LGBT community can fight for themselves since we have this mantra upon ourselves of being self-sufficient and strong individuals and being treated like human beings instead of being subclassed as being inferior and what-not, but...

Well, in my personal experience, rarely (if ever) have I come across a straight ally expecting me to treat them as if they're my knight in shining armour. Because they know better than that. And the ones that do are borderline homophobic anyway.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] glo_unit 2012-12-11 03:00 am (UTC)(link)
YMMV I've seen many straight people behave like being told that they shouldn't be celebrated for not being a horrible person who is a complete homophobe is the worst thing you could tell them.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 03:04 (UTC) - Expand

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 02:01 am (UTC)(link)
When did "Questioning" become a thing? Are people who are not entirely sure of their sexuality so oppressed? Serious question.

Maybe I'm biased, because I've had a lot of so called "fake gay girls" hit on me in my time. They were using me to determine if they were gay or straight. Like, they would go out on dates with me, eventually this would lead to kissing and more - and then a few weeks later it was like "Well, you're a great girl but you showed me I'm not gay. I'm with boy XY now, I hope you will find your true love one day, yadda yadda" and no fucking one called them out on that because they were "just finding out about their sexuality~~".

This shit happened to me four times within two years. And then I stopped going to gay clubs (where I had met all of these "let's try being lesbian" chicks).

I really think you can come to terms with your sexuality without making it a group/project/whatever :/
thaurfea: Losing My Religion (Default)

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

[personal profile] thaurfea 2012-12-11 12:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Think about this. What if there were no safe spaces, like a lesbian bar, for a questioning person to try to figure out what their sexuality is? I'm sure there are more questioning people who eventually decide they're queer than there are those who decide they're totally straight. I know everyone's coming-out experience is different, but for a lot of people there's a period where they're starting to realize they might be queer but haven't quite come to grips with it yet. Should we exclude from the queer community anyone who hasn't carved their label in stone? Hell, I've been out for almost ten years now and I'm still not sure what label fits me best.

tl;dr I'm sorry you've had bad experiences but serious answer, yes, questioning should be included.

Re: -cough- Bisexuality -cough-

(Anonymous) 2012-12-11 02:06 am (UTC)(link)
Technically A typically is used for both Asexuals and Allies - not just one or the other, iirc.