[ SECRET POST #3246 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3246 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 055 secrets from Secret Submission Post #464.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

"I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

I came across someone who said they hate kids - and made it very clear she just unapologetically hates them.

So... why do people hate (or at least strongly dislike) kids? I've always wondered this. I will admit I have trouble relating to them - I was a very different kind of kid than many, so my reaction to them half the time is "why don't you just want to read a book?" "Why do you think museums are stupid?" :P But I would never say I hate them...

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

My current hypothesis is that it's a result of strong external pressure to have kids. And to a lesser extent, pressure to love kids.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[philstar22]

I wouldn't say I hate kids. But I would say that outside of infants, I find them really, really annoying. Like, I can't handle them for very long. I can deal with a couple of hours, but any longer than that and I'm ready to pull my hair out.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

While I don't want to have kids of my own, I do like being around kids. I get not wanting to be around kids, they have a lot of energy and can be little snots, but people unapologetically hate kids freak me out a bit to honest.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

I hate kids, but I don't hate every child. If they are typical children who are full of energy and loud and attention demanding, I hate it and them in the same way "I hate mosquitos." It's not a person-to-person hate.

When people say they hate cats or hate dogs, they don't mean they go out of their way to hate every dog or cat they come across. They mean they hate having to interact or be around the typical dog or typical cat.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[kaijinscendre]

I don't know or understand. I can get hating annoying kids but I can't understand hating children in general.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[morieris]

I hate the concept of having one and putting so much time and money into them when it's my life, but I wouldn't go out of my way to hate children. I like seeing what the kids these days are doing, the games they're playing, ect.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[herpymcderp]

There are as many reasons to hate children as there are to hate any social group that someone doesn't know how to interact with and doesn't understand well. The same reasons people level hate at minorities or women or whatever they want to hate get levelled at children (e.g. loud, obnoxious, stupid, unclean).

Really it's just down to a specific person being unable or unwilling to accept that kids have positive qualities, and the reason for that can be varied as well. It might be that they're reacting to a social pressure to have or love children, it might be that they feel marginalized because they don't want them.

tl;dr there are a lot of reasons for people to decide they hate children.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

Because they were shitty brats when they were kids so they think all kids are like that.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[tasogare_n_hime]

I feel very uncomfortable around children, and I don't ever want any of my own. I can't really say I hate kids though. When I have to interact with kids(Thankfully a very, very rare thing.) especially young ones I go out of my way to be nice and keep them happy, because a happy kid is just so much easier to deal with.

I have come across a lot of people who act as is they think children exist just to offend them, and I just don't understand that.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think most people who say they hate kids actually do, what they hate is: 1. the societal pressure to have children/your life is incomplete until you have children/you don't know what love is until you have children, or 2. badly behaved children.

Unfortunately when you tell people you don't want kids you'll often get condescending remarks on how you'll change your mind some day, life is worthless without kids, it's different when it's your own, etc. So in response to that, people who don't want kids adopt hyperbolic language, "I hate kids" in the hopes their message will actually come across.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

To put it very bluntly, based on my extensive research (I work a museum job; lots of kids in school tour groups or with their families), kids are loud, stupid, and lack self-control. I don't begrudge kids for being those things - they haven't learned otherwise yet - but I certainly don't want to be around them.

I will say this: most kids are okay when they're alone/with their parents. Put them in school groups and they seem to magically become unmanageable little hellions. God bless people who become primary school teachers, because Lord knows I couldn't do it.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

I can get being uncomfortable around kids, not wanting kids and not wanting to be around them a lot, but I honestly don't get people who really hate kids, because really, it's a stage in life all people go through and every adult has been a kid at one point in life.

I also dont get treating kids like they are all the same. Just like adults, kids are different from each other. Some are super bratty, some are really sweet, and everything in between.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[kallanda_lee]

I really had a phase of hating kids, I'm more relaxed now, but I can tell you why:

- They're really loud, and have shrieky voices and I like quiet.
- They're very needy, constantly want/ask something and don't leave you alone.
- a lot of them seem permanently sticky/dirty and I genuinely dislike being touched by them.
- They also break things a lot, and I don't want them near my stuff.
- You can't always trust them with pets
- They can be very disruptive of certain environments (movie theatre, restaurant etc).
- You can't really have an intelligent conversation with them.

+ added factor that if you're a woman of childbearing age people harass you about having kids. Which forces me to have conversations about it,and really conversations about kids bore me to tears.

I also dont have much to compensate it. Like there's not much I like about kids, or that interests me.

So yeah, I used to say I hate kids.

But really it's more like utter disinterest and intense dislike of having to be in the same room as them.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[gobbledigook]

In my experience, the people who say they hate kids will be just fine with the ones that aren't ill behaved, so it's more like they don't like how most kids are obnoxious and entitled. Of course, the kid is not to blame as much as their parents, but the person who has to deal with an unpleasant child has no blame either.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

I wouldn't say I hate them, but they make me super uncomfortable to be around.

What I do hate is the prevalence of the thought that a) everyone should have/wants kids and b) everyone must LOOOOOVE kids and c) the insistence in media (both RL and fictional) and by people everywhere that Bad Things Happening to Kids = Worst Ever, Bar None.

IDEK.

A couple years back a kid was murdered and it was terrible, seriously terrible, I don't wish anyone dead but I remember this instance most because my coworkers went on and on and on about how awful it was that a child had been murdered. To the point where I snapped and asked what the appropriate age to be murdered was since they were making it all about the age instead of the, you know, death. Ugh.

But, honestly, kids themselves are generally fine. It's more everything else that surrounds them that gets me frustrated and angry. I can see why people would short-cut all of that irritation into 'I hate kids'. There's a lot of baggage surrounding kids, especially if you don't want any of your own.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

I've never come across someone who said they hate kids and actually meant it. I've heard people say they hate kids, but they mean, "I hate how this kid's acting like such a brat" or "I hate how this kid's mom let him touch my Lego collection without my permission". Stuff like that. I like kids to an extent and people say I would be a really good mom, but just because I like watching cartoons and playing with dolls doesn't mean I'd be a good mom. I can't stand kids when they're bratty or whiny, even though I know that they're not mature enough to handle their emotions. I don't mind babysitting for my friends so they can go on date nights or whatever, but I know I'd never be able to handle being responsible for a kid for the rest of my life. It bugs me when people say I'd make a good mom when I've told them a million times that motherhood is not the endgame for me. If being a parent is the endgame for you, that's wonderful! The world needs people who want to be parents and know they can put aside their selfishness to take care of a fragile new human. But I like to stay up late, sleep in, and have chocolate bars for breakfast in my underwear. I'm just not mom material.

"I hate teenagers!"

[(Anonymous)]

I find it weird that if you're like, "I hate kids," everyone clutches pearls and assumes you're horrible or can't understand children. Whereas if someone says they hate teenagers or says they can't stand them, it's understood that by teenagers you mean the average teen and there's an accepted norm for people of that age due to biology, hormones kicking in, et cetera. Fsr this doesn't apply the same way to kids because Think of the Children Precious Angels that Don't Count as a Stage of Life, I suppose?

It's a strange double standard, anyway.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[cakemage]

Well, I don't hate kids, but I really don't like being around the younger ones because they're loud, high-pitched, usually leaking out of at least one orifice and are often very sticky. On a less cranky-old-lady level, my immune system is crap, so I get sick very easily, and I worry about spreading any of my various plagues to any kids who might be unfortunate enough to be near me, so there's that. Plus, I've just plain never been good at interacting with young kids, not even when I was in that age range. Just never had the knack. Thankfully, none of my extended family's kids really mind, 'cause I'm the cool cousin who gives the best gifts. I've actually made it my mission to corrupt my cousin's daughter into the ways of equestrianism as payback for his transgressions when we were kids. Getting kids hooked on horses is way better revenge than loud toys, because horses are a very expensive hobby. Muahahaha.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[nightscale]

I find kids incredibly annoying and hard to deal with for long periods of time, I just don't have the patience frankly.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[dethtoll]

I tend to hate the parents more. Bad parenting makes bad kids. So when a kid bites you in the leg hard enough to draw blood because his mom thinks that's cute or whatever, tell her you're HIV+ and leave.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

It is clear that the furtherance of the species relies upon the production of children, yet no system of adequately shielding the right-thinking population from the lunacy and inconvenience of children yet exists. I believe that as a self-correcting evolutionary mechanism, however, our species has within it the ability to solve this problem.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

Honestly, I think it's a generational thing. The current generation of young folks hitting the age when the last generation became parents have a different set of social pressures/goals, so more people are flipping towards the "hate" side of the love-hate scale when it comes to kids.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[mimi-sardinia.livejournal.com]

When LJ wasn't a stereotypical desert scene with a tumbleweed rolling across it, I occasionally visited to Childfree comms there. There were some people, especially on CF_Hardcore, who could be very vitriolic about children, but like a lot of commenters in this thread have said, it was usually a combination of a dislike of badly behaving children, parents who fail at disciplining their children, parents who acted like entitled asses because they had children, people who bombarded CF people with constant pestering about having children, and reproductive issues (that is, the issues of preventing reproduction, usually permanently).

I will say going to those comms helped me decide my life did not need children, but like a lot of other things, my attitude is very laid back. I don't want them, I find the occasional encounter with noisy children a bit irritating, but it is not worth my energy to actively hate.

Though I have to say I feel my life has been very sheltered from people asking me when I will have children. It does help that Mum understands and accepts my stance.

Re: "I hate kids!"

[(Anonymous)]

They are loud, sticky, and won't sit still and be quiet while I get on with things.