[ SECRET POST #1680 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1680 ⌋


Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 05 pages, 102 secrets from Secret Submission Post #240.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - hit/ship/spiration ], [ 0 - omgiknowthem ], [ 0 - take it to comments ], [ 0 - repeats ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom.livejournal.com]

13. http://i52.tinypic.com/141i39i.jpg

[classic-mold137.livejournal.com]

I don't mean to be insensitive, because I really do sympathize with you, OP, but is that the island from Kingdom Hearts? It looks like it.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think so. I just googled "beach" or something. I think it's a photograph, but though it might be from KH.

[(Anonymous)]

I wish this was about me.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

Why would you wish that? You wish someone was in love with you who you didn't love back?

[(Anonymous)]

....well shit. 0_0

[granular.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, OP :(

[fairhearing.livejournal.com]

This is a very unhealthy relationship, OP, and it's not going to end well. You have to make clearer boundaries and/or step back until you're able to compartmentalize this and stop getting drained emotionally.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

I know. I know. Most days it's okay, but I know I need to pull back. Yet I'm afraid to, and on the good days, when we talk, it really does cheer me up. Even if it keeps giving me false hope. I'm just not there yet, I guess.

just some advice from your friendly neighbourhood anon.

[(Anonymous)]

I've been there, OP. It's not fun. But I ended up telling my fandom partner about my feelings, and even though we're not officially a couple, the emotional intimacy and honesty between the two of us is amazing. It took me a long, long time to come to grips with the fact that no, it wasn't going to happen on a physical level or even have such a handy label as BF/GF, but the relationship was too meaningful for me to just throw away because we valued different things in a romance.

It really depends on how the dynamic of the two of you works. If it ends up warping the two of you in unhealthy ways, then maybe you ought to distance yourself for both your sakes. Just keep in mind that your happy ending may not necessarily lie with that person, if so.

Re: just some advice from your friendly neighbourhood anon.

[(Anonymous)]

Thanks for this meaningful, thoughtful comment. I don't think what we have is unhealthy, altho it can be emotionally draining for me. I know I need to step back and get over it, tho part of me is still foolishly clinging too the hope. Every time I think I'm getting over her she does or says something that brings back all the longing & desire again. I know why she's not interested in me & I don't blame her for it because theyre things that neither of us can change [tho I'd be more than willing to try for her], and frankly, she deserves much better than me. It's just soulcrushingly depressing all the same. She's so tangible & perfect she makes everything/everyone else paltry & sour by comparison, but I still can't have her. It'd be different if I was in love with Angelina Jolie & know I could never have her or likely even meet her. Here, I'm so damn close & still denied. I really am afraid I'll never find someone so perfect for me again & I think that's may be part of why I keep holding out.

Re: just some advice from your friendly neighbourhood anon.

[masked-creator.livejournal.com]

This is a good comment!

[goobbledigook.livejournal.com]

Wouldn't it suck if you met your fave celebrity only to find out they were into Feederism? or a furry? would you be a furry for your fave celeb, op? hmmmmmmm.

[goobbledigook.livejournal.com]

uh oh

[(Anonymous)]

Uhhhhhhhhh no, but I might try to get into a sport s/he was into, or a type of food, or dance or something. Anywy, she's not asking me to change. I'd be doing it to better myself so I'd be more appealing to her. Basically, no one wants to date a loser living in mom's basement. She inspires me to want to be a fucking doctor or something.

[filthy-animal.livejournal.com]

Oh lord, anything but furries!

[(Anonymous)]

I know how you feel, anon. I could have written this, more than once.

I want to say that you won't know unless you talk about it, but that would make me the biggest hypocrite of all. You have my deepest empathy and hope that it may work out for both of us some day.

[(Anonymous)]

Thanks. Of course, Im also worreid this'll destroyt he friendship which I really dont want, but sometimes its like... how do you salvage it otherwise? Plus the wild hope it could still somehow magically work out like the movies. Life sucks.

[filthy-animal.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty much there, anon. It's not fun but you gotta let go of them romantically for your own sake. :/ It's not easy but it'll get better. Just try to be happy for what you DO have with your friend. :3 It sounds like it's something very special already. Take comfort in that. That in itself is rare. <3

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, theres that too, she's amazing enough that i dont want to ruin the friendship. Its just hard moving from in love with her back to platonic love & theres no one that can help ro tell you how to do that. I'm trying to let go, & I keep thinking I'm there/getting close, &then she says or does something & it all comes crashing back & makes it hard to brethe again.

I understand & respect why, but why cant life be like the movies? Why not just the once? The rest of my life has been such shit. I keep thinking 'finally, this is it, its finally my turn for a bit of happiness, all your hard works is finally paying off'... but no. Just more sidelines, making other ppl happy while you're cryinginside.

[countess-k.livejournal.com]

I've been on the other side of this fence and reading this, I just wanted to say I admire your courage and consideration OP. You must truly love her to not put her in that difficult position and jeopardize the friendship. Love should come naturally to a person and while I cannot promise it would come to your partner, not dropping a bomb on them and respecting their feelings is the best way to go in this situation.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

Thanks, truly. This makes me feel a litlte better. I know its sort of hopless, so dragging it out and making her uncomfortable won't serve any purpose & she has enough shit in her life without me piling it on. I'm the friend shes supposed to be able to relax with, no t cause more drama. there's that whole saying about loving someone and letting them go and if they come back its meant to be, etc. it hurts to know I'm not enough and shes not willing to try with me, but I understand her posisiton. I can't be mad at her for it. It hurts and makes me so sad, but I respesct it.

I guess I really jsut hope that, with enough time, I'll be able to love her platonically. I really do want her happiness, even if its not with me. I jsut need to get over the fact that I'm not gonna be the one to make her happy. [& she's not gonna be the one who makes me happy.] It's just sad knowing it, & fearing that I'll never find someone truly like her again. I'm not exaggerating when I say she's the most perfect person for me I've ever met/beenfriends with/had a chance with. [I'm not 50 and all-wise, but I'm also not an expenericed lovestruck teenager.]

That scenery is beautiful

[(Anonymous)]

It's so relaxing. Sauce, please? I need wallpaper of that. Now.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

http://www.johnwoowalls.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Tropical-Beach-2.jpg

[(Anonymous)]

I've been there. On both sides. The one who was pining and the one was pined for.

Speaking from someone who was longing after someone, I know how rough it can be. Unfortunately you can't make someone love you. It's a really hard pill to swallow. All that you can do is be the best person you can be and hope they'll one day see that. Except I would strongly suggest to stop putting them on a pedestal. It's difficult, but it could lead to a lot of trouble and heartache. From what you've said, she sounds like a nice person (even though your opinion is biased), but one day in a moment of weaknesses she could take advantage of your admiration. There's no going back from that. There's also the chance an opportunity could pass you by. Someone could have eyes for you and you wouldn't even notice because you're too busy looking at someone who doesn't want to be with you. In the end, it's their loss and YOU (not her) deserve someone who will love you back the way you would love them.