[ SECRET POST #2535 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2535 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 026 secrets from Secret Submission Post #362.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

Let us see your real life confessions!

Re: Confessions!

[fingalsanteater]

I once killed a man in Reno just to see him die.

Re: Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

I was in a theater class with this guy, and no matter what he was wearing, or what day of the week it was, he always smelled really bad, which was frustrating, because I had to get up close and personal with him.

Eventually, I figured out that it was his dreds, because they were literally the only constant (and he didn't smell the way that people who don't shower do, you know? but kind of sour?)

And I wish I could have said something the whole time we were in class together, but I didn't, and now I'm just going to hope that I never have another class with him where I have to get up close and personal because it was awful.

cw: rape

[(Anonymous)]

I find posts like this

http://25.media.tumblr.com/9c75b50197204b84fbeddeaa070c49db/tumblr_mf8nayoRq91qm8zqco1_500.jpg

to be really gross, because while I can agree with some of it (women should be able to dress how they want without being worried about getting raped), I've seen it used to shut down things about self-defense, and common sense (don't let your friend go to someone's house when they're drunk, stick with groups, etc.), and I know, I know, we should just "tell rapists not to rape", but the fact is, for most rapists*, rape is about power & control, telling them not to rape isn't actually going to work.

And now you're shaming people for trying to find ways to protect themselves from a predator by telling them that they secretly just want someone else to be raped instead, and if they were a good feminist, they'd let themselves be raped.

I hate this.

* excluding the college-aged "wait, that's rape?" douche who doesn't realize that drunk** sex =/= consensual

** drunk, not "I had a beer, let's bang"

Re: cw: rape

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah. Just because you have a realistic vision of "how things should be AND CAN BE" doesn't mean you should ignore "how things actually are AT THIS MOMENT IN TIME."

People simplify this into making the bonehead reasoning that "this is how things are" = "this is natural and how things will always be and you can't do anything to change it." Sure, people can work to change it, and I firmly believe that people can change it, but in the meantime, sorry, but you have to adapt to the current situation in some ways.

Re: cw: rape

[(Anonymous)]

Telling rapists not to rape should really be called comprehensively teaching about what rape is so kids don't grow up to be those "wait, that's rape?" douches.

"Don't rape" doesn't teach shit when people think rape is nothing but men hiding in dark alleys and jumping on the first woman who walks by.

Re: cw: rape

[(Anonymous)]

I've read that twitter post multiple times and it still doesn't make any goddamn sense to me. I can only conclude that reading it has actually made me more stupid

Re: cw: rape

[blunderbuss]

Well, look, is there some wisdom about having 'common sense' when it comes to personal safety? Sure there is. But considering that most rapists will be someone you know then most 'common sense' goes out the window.

And besides, the post is trying to point out that 'common sense' might be able to save you personally, but it doesn't fix the core problem. Like, for example, a gay guy learning self-defense might prevent him from being gay-bashed, but that hasn't actually fixed the problem has it? It saved HIM, sure, but a person willing to hurt someone for being gay isn't just going to give up because some gay dude fought him off.

Will telling that person to not hurt gay people going to work? Probably not. But the only way things will change is by taking the spotlight off 'common sense' and bring to light the idea that no 'common sense' should ever have to include 'how not to get beaten up for having a boyfriend'.

Re: cw: rape

[(Anonymous)]

Wait, that isn't even true. It doesn't work that way. Him raping "you" isn't going to stop him from raping "that other girl" next.

Re: cw: rape

[(Anonymous)]

That's not how I interpret the post. To me, it's saying that there's pretty much no such thing as preventing rape through self-defense or precaution, there's only redirecting it to another person who is less well-protected. The only true rape prevention is education and imprisonment. Posts like that aren't trying to say that no one should be careful and alert and do their best not to be raped, they're saying that individual precaution doesn't stop kids from turning into predators, doesn't stop people from focusing on what the victim was doing instead of the criminal who broke the law, and doesn't even get rapists off the streets. It's an attempt to make people stop criticizing individuals for the crime committed against them and criticize the society in which such a crime so often goes unprosecuted, unconvicted, and generally unaddressed.

It's saying our whole concept of what "rape prevention" actually requires in order to be successful on a significant level is flawed. At least, that's how I see it.

Re: Confessions!

[blunderbuss]

There's someone in my family who I would be genuinely, earnestly happy if they died. Like, after hearing the news I would fist-pump and go "YES!"

Re: Confessions!

[darkmanifest]

Considering what kinds of horrible family one can get stuck with for life by virtue of birth, I don't blame you.

Re: Confessions!

[anonymouslyyours]

Once when I read that it was estimated around 145,000 die every day I did the math and became physically enraged that of all the time he'd been in my life around 942,500,000 people had died and none, not even one of them had been my stepfather.

So, uh, YANA.

Re: Confessions!

[cakemage]

I understand that feeling. I know I shouldn't wish death on anyone, but it kind of pisses me off that most of my recently-deceased relatives were kind, loving, wonderful people, while all of the abusive shitbags with whom I'm ashamed to share blood are still in perfect health.

Re: Confessions!

[caerbannog]

Found out my father (may?) have had an abusive childhood*. :( Conflicted because I'm the favourite grandchild and was never treated so (because my grandmother and parents and aunties and uncles all kept an eye on him).

Bit :/ about it all.

But my father told me he's tried to be nothing like my grandfather and I reassured I'm I love him and he's an alright father, considering the types of kids in our family.

*explanation was vague

Re: Confessions!

[blunderbuss]

Yeah, that happened to me too. I was the youngest grandchild and so I was doted on, and then as I grew older I learned what absolutely horrible people they were to their own kids. I felt so terrible and naive for ages.

What's that saying? Growing up is watching your heroes turn human?

Re: Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

I literally don't know if I was abused or I was an abuser and it sometimes keeps me up at night!

Re: Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not sure if I'm actually into ladies or just normal on the Kinsey scale + scared to initiate a relationship with a dude + frigid, and it's really disappointing on all counts.

Don't have a crisis of sexuality, kids. It's not worth it.

Re: Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

I still can't tell the difference between liking someone and loving someone - friends, family, romance, it makes no difference. I still don't know if I've ever actually felt love for the important people in my life. I don't think I have.

Re: Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

If a misandrist is an actual thing, I think I'm becoming one. It's really bad because I'm in a job (and also volunteer in a position) where I'm supposed to help people equally and I am... neglecting half the people who need my help.

Biggest confession? I'm not sure I really care. At least not enough to change my behaviour.

Re: Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

I'm a lesbian. But there have been times I've seriously questioned the tag, and not because I've fell for a dude or anything like that. But because... while I enjoy sex, I've never had an orgasm with another woman. (Nor men, for the record). I can only come if I'm alone.

And it scares me to hell, because I REALLY don't feel identified by asexuals and what I've researched on their experiences (yes, I know there's no such thing as "THE Asexual Experience"); I'm like NOPE THAT DOESN'T IDENTIFY ME.

I do get hot. I do like everything from First to Nth Base. Just... can't come. It sucks major balls.

Re: Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

Everyone tells me I don't have a boyfriend or friends because I don't go out. They're right, but I don't go out because I don't have a boyfriend or friends to go out with.

I think some social justice warriors are kind of problematic and racist

[(Anonymous)]

I'm beginning to think a lot of SJWs are just as problematic and racist as the people they're complaining about. I'm sorry, but if you think your duty as a white person is to pretend you're a divine spokesperson for every non-white person out there, you're essentially buying into the same idea that one group is "less" than yours. That's pretty fucking twisted.

Re: Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

I want to write a book about growing up with a disability, but I'm scared that if I do, and it achieves any kind of success, that's all I'll ever be known for. I worry that makes me a hypocrite. :/

Re: Confessions!

[(Anonymous)]

My grandma died the day after Mother's Day. My mom had gone over to visit her the day before, and I had seen her (my grandma, I mean) a couple weeks before. But on Mother's Day, I couldn't shake the feeling that we had to go see her again, but I didn't say or do anything. I'm so angry at myself.