[ SECRET POST #6997 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6997 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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[The Last DJ / Global Shuffle Dance Music @ Youtube]



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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 22 secrets from Secret Submission Post #999.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

General comments:

(If the thread contains spoilery/triggery content please warn/post as 2nd comment so it collapses!
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Fandoms you wish were bigger, fandoms you wish were smaller...

[(Anonymous)]

And why?

Re: Fandoms you wish were bigger, fandoms you wish were smaller...

[philstar22]

Bigger: Silmarillion. Just because I want even more people. It isn't tiny per say, but it isn't huge either. And it is the type of fandom where there is so much to explore, seeing more people and different interpretations is just always fun.

Legend of the Seeker. Wish the fandom hadn't died because I'd love to still be in it. It was so active for a while and fun.

Smaller: Star Wars. So much of the fandom is so obnoxious and so entitled.

Re: Fandoms you wish were bigger, fandoms you wish were smaller...

[kaijinscendre]

I wish all my fandoms were bigger because I love reading fic. But if I had to choose three in regards to fic output, it'd be Wolf 359, Moon Knight, and Mass Effect. There are specific ships in huge fandoms I with were bigger and more popular. :(

Favourite Small Fandoms!

[(Anonymous)]

Lets hear them! And does their size affect your enjoyment of them?

Re: Favourite Small Fandoms!

[(Anonymous)]

I don't know if it counts as small, but the overall CLAMP fandom have been good ever since my Livejournal days and throughout my years on Tumblr way up to the present day.

Its been nice to see newer people still get into the manga works over the years and I love the sense of humor for the fact that half the works are never getting updated and Card Captor Sakura is the favorite child of all of CLAMP's works.
(I had a good giggle when xxxHolic finally got an update after a 8 years hiatus and the X fans were making memes about being bitter and forgotten - which as a fan of both series was a fun day for me).

Re: Favourite Small Fandoms!

[philstar22]

Legend of the Seeker. I miss that fandom. It used to be way more active, is almost dead now. That show is fun, and the fandom was even more fun. I miss it.

Babylon 5 fandom, at least the active parts, are fairly small. And generally nice, welcoming, and fun.

Re: Favourite Small Fandoms!

[kaijinscendre]

Most podcasts I am into like SAYER or Wolf 359 have woefully small fandoms. I wish they were bigger so I had more people to discuss them with.

Also older movies get huge fic drop off after like a year. Chronicles of Riddick, Batman Trilogy (Nolan), and Jurassic World are a few. The only movie fandom I recall having a huge output was Inception.

Re: Favourite Small Fandoms!

[(Anonymous)]

Flight of the Heron (listed under Jacobite Trilogy.) Enemies to friends (should be more) and h/c is spades. The fic is good, and fills a need.

Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

As an adult, I mean. I was having a vent session with a few friends (all of them from different areas in the U.S. and not necessarily similar backgrounds) and the best anyone could say was that things were just "okay". A lot of the conflict came from rough childhoods (and the parents' refusal to acknowledge or apologize for things), dislike of a partner/spouse, and disagreements over career or parenting. This seems pretty common, but I don't know. Are there people out there who get along great with their parents? Like, if you weren't related, you'd still be friends?

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

Eh. There was a lot of conflict during my childhood. Not violent, but I didn't fit the mold my parents wanted and they kept trying to shape me long after I was too old for it. Things didn't improve until I left home AND they couldn't exert financial control over me. That's a little messed up, to be sure. From a young age up until I left, I was threatened with grounding, library privileges taken away, my personal book collection taken away (it would've been internet, but I'm too old for that!) and a general reading ban, bedroom door removal (because I wanted basic privacy and for people to knock before entering), being kicked out of the house, not helping to pay for school, forcing me to come home and attend community college (which they saw as inferior) instead of state college because I was struggling in ONE CLASS, and general ostracization from the family. All for my own good, of course.

Losing their ability to punish me with those things kind of forced them to behave more reasonably, which is sad. They also turned their focus on my younger siblings in an attempt to crack down on this disturbing trend of rebellion, i.e. their kids growing up to be their own person. We've never discussed my childhood and their failed attempts to "fix" me because there'd be no point. They'd never admit they were wrong. The failure, in their eyes, was not trying to control a 16 year old girl's hair, but in giving up and letting me have below shoulder-length hair instead of cut just below my ears. We're not fully estranged, but I keep them at an arm's length because of this, and I know that I'd never be able to rely on them for help without serious strings attached.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[philstar22]

Yes. It was complicated at points, particularly with my dad. But he passed a couple years ago. And mom and I are super close, live together, look after each other. Actually came out to her as bisexual, she seems fine with it.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

I have a pretty good relationship with my mom. We go on vacation together and visit each other every few years (we live about 2k miles away from each other). I don't know if we would be friends without being related because we're very different from each other, but she raised me with the underlying premise that she wanted a kid and I was never consulted, so nothing I do could disappoint her. I remember asking once, what she would do if I killed someone, and she said she would visit me regularly in prison. XD

My dad, on the other hand...well, I had a party when he died. Massive asshole who considered me to be his property until he legally had no claim to me. He mostly considered me a tool to harass my mom. When I was small he would drag my mom into court for partial custody, weekends, vacations, and then would leave me to my own devices and go off with his girlfriends. I got a restraining order out on him in middle school and never saw him again, though he kept trying through the courts.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

Yes, I have a good relationship. I enjoy their company and genuinely enjoy holidays when we all gather together. I talk to my parents on average at least once a week on the phine and we have a family text chat that is pretty active (I have 4 siblings).

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

Nope. One parent deceased, and the other, no contact for over a decade. I wish it were just a matter of "man, they're being so difficult about xyz" because we might get along okay now. But lifelong abuse of multiple kinds, mixed with neglect and active sabotage of my relationships and ambitions, just really make me not want to be on the same planet as this person. If I think about it too much, I get grossed out. I'm still playing catchup with things I missed out on during crucial developmental years, and have to accept that as an adult there are likely milestones I will never reach.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

I'd say my relationship with my parents is good, but I wouldn't be friends with them if we weren't related, nor they me. But that's mostly because all our interests are too divergent and we don't have much in common, not because we'd dislike each other or don't get along.

I don't think my parents would choose to be friends with each other either if they randomly met as strangers now. They had things in common in their 20s-30s when they got married but it's been decades since then and people don't always keep the same interests. That doesn't mean the relationship falls apart, though. It just means you do more things individually and pursue your own hobbies with the family as a home base to return to.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

These days, yes. We did not have a good relationship from the time I was eleven to the time I was about thirty, mostly because my mother was incredibly focused on my weight (I was taller and heavier than her at eleven, she even got angry that my shoe size was bigger than hers). I wasn't even fat until her constant bullying and forced dieting led me right into a binge eating disorder. Then I got cancer and the most important thing was still my weight. My dad never personally addressed my weight in any way but also backed her up completely.

Once I was past the cancer, I realized that if I wanted any relationship with her, I had to train her out of talking about weight. So I did, by redirecting when she started, and then leaving or hanging up the phone if she continued. And it eventually worked. So now we can focus on the other parts of our relationship and it's vastly better.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not "friends" with my parents but that doesn't mean it's not a good relationship. My mom visits a couple times a year and we keep in touch, my dad has sort of checked out of paying attention to anyone but we don't hate each other. What most people generally don't talk about is that huge gray area between "omg we hang out all the time and are sooooo involved" and "I cut off contact years ago and that's all I'm saying." I'm not married, no kids, and over 50, so my 75+ yo parents still being on friendly terms is what I would consider pretty normal.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

I’ve never felt so much freedom as the day my mother died. My father is ok but we’ll never be close. And if he knew more about me, he’d disown me like he did his son.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

good but it could be better

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

Not me, we haven't seen each other in many years, which is definitely for the best. I tried again and again to mend the relationship in the years before I left, it was a terribly sad decision to make but I do feel I tried everything I could first. Wish things could have been different but estrangement has brought me a lot of joy and freedom that I never knew.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

I had a tumutulous relationship with my mum when I was a child and teenager but we're closer now than we were then, especially since dad passed away last year. I got along swimmingly with dad but mum and I just clashed when I was younger.

Probably because we're both Scorpios.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah it's good. Not when me and my sister were kids, but they stepped up to support me and her when we couldn't support ourselves anymore. We all have issues, we clash, but it works.

Re: Personal question: do you have a good relationship with your parents?

[dani_phantasma]

For the most part .. there are things my dad says or does that occasionally frustrate me but ..overall its pretty good.

When i was living with them as a young adult in my late teens and early twenties it was probably the worst but it looking back I was just as much a nightmare with them as i felt they were to me and a big part of it was because I was coming off a time in my life that was genuinely emotionally traumatic. The first two years after my graduation I remember days I spent sleeping 14 hours a day and wandering the neighborhood feeling almost in a detached daze and occasionally having dark thoughts watching the cars pass.

Then soon after that we MOVED which in the past has not been great for my stress levels. we lived in this TINY ass town and for a while I had a hard time finding a job and my folks thought the best thing to do was to pull an intervention with my electronics like I was addicted and I was honestly like.'I'm a young adult living with my folks in a small town and I cannot drive..and y'all are treating me like an addict for being on my computer online all the time?? seriously?"

we moved a lot since i was young because of where my dad's job took him. and i often had my stress levels spike - which in turn made my OCD symptoms really bad for a time.

but things are better now for the most part. Though since a bad HR manager forced me out of my job last May... well looking for a job has been rough and I have dealt with OCD anxiety centering around my whole family just deciding I'm too much trouble to deal with (obviously this isn't something they've made me feel like but OCD esp when severe is a bitch about things that it knows are your worst fear.. so augh)

Restless Leg Syndrome

[(Anonymous)]

Anyone else deal with this? I have throughout my life but it wasn't every night or anything. I'm on a new medication and one of the side effects is RLS and now every night I wake up with my legs driving me nuts. I have a follow up with my dr and I'm going to mention it but until then, I suffer.