[ SECRET POST #2696 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2696 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 023 secrets from Secret Submission Post #385.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

Spit 'em out!

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

I'm really afraid that I have depression and I don't know what to do about it.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[sarillia]

I was in that boat a few years ago. It's not a fun place to be. Can you talk to a doctor about it?

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

talk to a mental health professional

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

Go see a doctor. I know it can seem like the scariest thing, but they will be able to help you figure out what's going on with you and what the best course of action is, because that's a decision you can't and shouldn't make by yourself. Get someone you trust to go with you, if that helps - not necessarily into the actual appointment, just to make sure you have that extra push behind you, and help you get home if needs be. Or try a helpline if you want to talk things through with someone neutral. I've used them several times throughout my life and they're incredibly helpful for that.

I hope things work out for you! *hugs*

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

I spent years pretending that what I was experiencing weren't depressive episodes. Spoiler alert: that's exactly what they were.

I could have been getting help a long time ago if I'd swallowed my stupid pride and admitted I needed help.

(On affording it: check your options carefully. The ACA has changed the game for a lot of Americans in terms of being able to afford help.)

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

I've been there. Don't do what I did and spend 8 months lying on the floor waiting to feel better; it might not work. I'm glad you came here and asked FS instead; that's already a good first step. Talk to someone. Contact that therapist whose page you've been looking at and see what she has to say. Even if this one is too expensive, you might be able to find others who have sliding scale pay rates, or she might know about some free options for you.

I hope you have better days ahead.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[diet_poison]

Everyone else has already given good advice, so...best of luck, anon. It sucks but it does get better, so much better, with some time and treatment.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

Anon, the important thing is to keep doing something that makes some small positive change in your life. Don't let fandom or gaming or work or whatever become your life. I was very lonely for a while and stuck in a location where I couldn't even leave the house without a great deal of effort (I can't drive and the nearest supermarket was half an hour away). I'm not kidding when I say I buried myself in fandom/fic and nearly failed my course as a result.

Surround yourself with people who can help and don't let yourself be bogged down by the tricks your mind's playing on you. And fwiw I'm not being holier than thug: I know how much effort it takes. Be kind to yourself and take small (but productive) step, OP!

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

Anon, the important thing is to keep doing something that makes some small positive change in your life. Don't let fandom or gaming or work or whatever become your life. I was very lonely for a while and stuck in a location where I couldn't even leave the house without a great deal of effort (I can't drive and the nearest supermarket was half an hour away). I'm not kidding when I say I buried myself in fandom/fic and nearly failed my course as a result.

Surround yourself with people who can help and don't let yourself be bogged down by the tricks your mind's playing on you. And fwiw I'm not being holier than thou: I know how much effort it takes. Be kind to yourself and take small (but productive) step, OP!

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

Well, one thing that might help you ease into it, is go to the doctor and get some blood tests done if you can (for iron deficiency, thyroid problems, etc.) to rule out other sources of depression-like symptoms?

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

My family thinks I've been a vegetarian for over a decade but I started eating meat again around six months ago. I keep up the facade because I'm a stubborn dumbass and I know they'd tease me if they found out (not in a mean way or anything, it's just what we do)

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

I tell everyone I hated high school, but sometimes I wonder if I would've liked it better had I not been so busy convincing myself I didn't really need friends anyway.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

Buzzfeed recently did a post quoting Whisper confessions from men with eating disorders, and I caught myself feeling like some of them were not from cismen. I also get this feeling most of the time when "Blah blah, I'm a guy by the way" comes out.

And I feel bad about it, because a transman is still a man, so what does it matter? But at the same time, the life experience of someone who hasn't been always perceived as male is going to be different from someone who has. But I'm still not sure what it matters. IDK, maybe it's leftover annoyance from all the tumblr snowflakes bleeding over?

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

I am so sick of the people from my high school. Moving on from the bullying from peers and teachers for me meant having no contact with anyone. However, they are planning a reunion for next year, and I keep getting emails about it. I finally sent a strongly worded email asking to be taken off the list, but that has been ignored.

At least I finally stopped getting funding requests from the high school. That took a strongly worded letter from my mother.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

The end of a relationship for some reason rekindled my pegging kink (not for angry reasons, it's just...there again)

I shared this with a guy friend, mostly because I thought it was funny.

Apparently said guy friend has apparently really wanted to try this for awhile?

So at some point this summer, depending on how things go, I might end up putting on a strapon and reaming some guy. That's a heck of a transition.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

When I was younger, I made my grandmother promise if she died she would back as a ghost or an angel or something. I was dead serious. (I was deep as a kid.)

I don't know what scares me more - that she will or that she won't.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

The only thing that bothers me about potentially not having kids is that I'll be forgotten about.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

Recently I was hit on by a creep at my bus stop who wouldn't listen to me when I said, as politely as I could, that I was unavailable. After that I wanted to tell him to fuck off and leave me alone, but I kept being polite. The only reason I did was because he was black and I didn't want him to think I was racist. I don't know if that was the right decision.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

I haven't had sex and haven't really been in a serious relationship for a very long time and it makes me feel like I am worth less than other people

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[silvereriena]

I like putting sriracha sauce on chocolate chip cookies. The faces people have made when I've told them.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

I get spazzy when people make posts in tech support forums that don't provide any information up front. I used to work in a tech support capacity and have come to appreciate people who can at least provide a couple pertinent details. SInce I'm no longer being paid to do this and help out on a volunteer basis, I'm going to pass over your query if you don't provide even one shred of useful info. Yes, I'm a bitch. I'm well aware of that fact. I stopped caring a while ago.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

I have commitment issues.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

I'm over 30 and feel like I still don't know how to make friends.

I play online stuff from time to time, and participate in fandom forums, but it just isn't the same. But every time I even hear ANYBODY in real life discussing ANYTHING fandom related, I have to bite my tongue or try my damnedest to not explode into a fit of 12-year-old giggles and praises, out of fear they'll see me as a no-life idiot, a sad fraudulent fuck, or a stupid weeaboo.

Even when I do discuss things, I have to rein back the excitement and love I feel for a series (mostly video games and anime) and talk about it calmly. But then this might send the signal I'm not interested in discussing fandom either. I know fandom shouldn't be the only thing to connect over, and I do have other interests, but god damn I wish I had some awesome fandom friends IRL with whom I could get fucking retarded about fandom shit.

Re: Nonfandom Secrets/Confessions

[(Anonymous)]

for as long as I can remember, I can sleep better/ breathe better when lying down if I stretch my arms over my head.

This means that for as long as I can remember I've been falling asleep to bondage fantasies,